My 17 year old daughter is hung up on a "bad boy" what can I do to stop her?

Answer 1

Your house your rules. The boy needs to come to the door to pick her up and not honk. Invite the boy over for dinner and get to know him. Kill this boy with kindness unless he disrespects you openly.

Do not leave them alone in your daughter's room, etc. Do talk to your daughter about the future - college etc. and keep communication open.

If you tell your daughter not to date him, she will do it in secret. Keeping communication open and positive will help your daughter see the truth in this boy and that her mother loves her.

Good luck.

Answer 2

I hate to say this, but their is nothing you can do, I have seen a similar predicament like ur in a very close friend about the same age years ago, and the ultimate disaster was, leaving home, getting pregnant, being a victim of violence and eventually having strained realtions with the family. Im only hoping it does not happen to your daughter, and if you lay down the law she may end up rebelling, and if you dont the freedom she gets may get her involved in things beyond ur imagination, i would try and get a close friend to confide in her and give her advise or take it from a point where u explain to her in a loving way that what it can do. Talk to her, tell her how you feel, but in a relaxed mood! shouting or arguing will only make it worse!

Good Luck!

Answer 3

Recognize that the boy is not the problem - it's your daughter's issue. Her self-esteem is suffering terribly or she wouldn't be drawn to this guy. On some level, she knows she's better than he is, and she's validating her own insecure feelings by latching on to someone beneath her. If you can get her to do it, have her read the book "Codependent No More". She'll see herself over and over again in that book and it may help her to break a very destructive cycle - especially before she becomes an "adult" - which is a misnomer. Recent research has shown that the human brain is not fully developed until around age 22 - especially the frontal lobe where impulse control and empathy originate from. It's terrifying to realize that our government has announced that kids can have adult rights at 18 when they are not fully capable of adult decisions until about age 22. No wonder there are so many alarming issues in society these days!

Answer 4

tell her that you warned her

that she'll regret it and say " Mom, why didn't I listen to you."

tell her that he's just going to be some loser that when your older wish you had nothing to do with.

tell her that it's very immature and boys just put on acts to get recognized.

That he will probably be calus and mean to her once he knows he can have your daughter and that he is fake.

say " I'm older then you and I'm your Mother, I've been in school and seen the games and acts played. And I've also seen what they later ( bad boys) become and from what I've learned is that they are not what you think they are."

and that any friends that you had growing up were always greatly dissapointed and realized how stupid they were for falling into the most common trap.

spice it up and put some spin into it.. but maybe I gave you some ideas>


hope everything works out for you and your daughter

Answer 5

A lot of that depends upon your relationship with your daughter. If you are very close then just knowing that you don't approve can be enough. If that isn't enough then you have to take a more tactful approach. Telling her that she can't see him or forcing her to not see him will only drive her more to him. Instead you have to start by inviting this boy over to your house for supper and get him involved in doing things with you and your family. If he really is such a "bad boy" then he will refuse or make a fool of himself at these events. This is the start of showing your daughter that he isn't good for her future and not what she really is looking for in life. This way it isn't you telling her he is wrong, it is her seeing it in action. Who knows, it could turn out that your daughter has made a good choice and he really isn't so bad. Ok, wishful thinking but it does happen. :)

Answer 6

Not a thing. The best way to teach a kid not to stick a screwdriver into an electrical outlet is to let them do it once. After thet recover from the shock, they usually won't make the same mistake again.

Give her some condoms and money for a motel room and let the little miscreant have his way. After he discards her like a used tissue, I bet she will be wiser in her selection of men. Better to learn that young than at 40 with a mess a kids.

Answer 7

You can't stop her. If you try to forbid it or stop her she will only want it more. It is a rebellious thing she is going through. The best thing you can do is keep the lines of communication open and try to be there for her as much as you can and pick up the pieces when it falls apart. She will learn in time that this isn't the best decision for her and she will fix it on her own. Just have faith that you have raised her right and she will snap out of it.

Answer 8

Ya.. I know it's not the brightest idea to tell you to let this happen unchallenged, but fact is (depending on what kinda teenager she is) if you try and stop her, it'll motivate her more. To the point where she may find herself staying with him just to spite you and to rebel, but not because she likes him that much. She's not an adult yet, but she's at the point where she's going to start making her own 'adult choices' and there's not a whole lot you can really do for her except give little pieces of advice here and there. Suggestions are often welcome when it comes to a teenager, demands are often met with a great deal of resistence.. Keep that in mind when you sit her down to talk to her.

Answer 9

Don't try to stop her, at least directly, she'll like him more. Invite him over for dinner, or a Friday night family movie with popcorn and sodas. act as though you want to get to know him also and play it of very well. if he pulls up to pick her up invite him in for a few minutes and don't take no or any excuses for an answer.

it'll mess with her mind and eventually cause her to back away slowly or you'll learn he may not be such a bad boy after all!

Answer 10

It's hard to do I know cause I am a mother too. I also know the more you try to keep her from him the more she's gonna run to him. And you want to save your daughter from all the hurt, pain, and down falls of being with a "Bad Boy" , but you just have to go to a higher power and be there for her when he crash and burn. God Bless!