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30 answers

Good excuse to trade him in for a new model.

2006-09-28 06:36:45 · answer #1 · answered by Mr Glenn 5 · 0 0

i play a one-strike game

but, that's me


other rules, however,
don't make for a bad match


your husband cheating
was hurtful to your feelings

but, your husband lying!
was hurtful to your marriage


when you got married
you both knew what the other expected
in behavior

you SHOULD have agreed
on consequences before taking vows.
if you HAD
you'd now know, right off
what your next move is

when you were a loving couple
each of you would make decisions based on what's best for both of you
but, now
you have to make decisions based on what's best for you

so,
you have to think about what you want
out of a relationship.
how does a relationship help you?
what aspects of it, help make you a better person?

describe the partner
that fits your ideal

now, think about your husband
as he is right now
does he fit the description of your ideal partner?

are you willing to compromise
about those aspects of him that are less than your ideal?
--a "yes" here isn't an automatic "wrong" answer. but, you don't want to devalue yourself by "settling". if YOU can be a certain decent way, why shouldn't your adult partner behave as well?


it sounds like he regrets the cheating and the lying.
he wants you to "forgive" him
to keep on with the marriage
but,
why does he think you should?
what's in it for you?

he doesn't have self control
he doesn't respect your feelings
he allows others to disrespect you (the girlfriend)
he thinks so little of you that he lied to your face
(perhaps he's given you a disease)

what does he like about you anyway?
about YOU, not about the financial benefits of marriage


it's common for people to change in marriage
they don't keep the spark up
they allow themselves to deteriorate in looks, intellect, allure, laughter
all of that should be corrected
and, most times, people get back on track, especially when their spouse lovingly encourages them to

but, no matter how much a person
"lets her/himself go"
s/he still doesn't go so far as to cross the line of infidelity

once that happens
you have to start over
as if you are strangers
which you are, really
'cause you don't know him
and he doesn't know you

so, just like in the beginning
you talk with yourself and decide what you want for your life
he talks with himself and decides what he wants for his life

and you talk with each other
and see if you both want the same thing

or, at least
enough of the same things
to stay together


g'luck

2006-09-28 08:20:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Every situation is different, just as people are different. and you are the only one that knows your particular situation. Is he willing to go to counseling with you? Are you the type of person that in time, will be able to forgive him? Is he truly sorry for what he did? These are questions that only you and your husband can answer. If you answered yes to all these questions and you truly feel the marriage is worth saving, then I would give counseling a shot. If not, then you need to give careful consideration to what your alternatives are. Best of luck to you.

2006-09-28 06:44:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

i comprehend you reported that divorce on your u . s . isn't commonly used, yet this isn't a reliable situation you're in. initially he's not straightforward with you. it truly is large. in case you could not trust the fellow you're with you do not have any further something. trust is what a courting prospers on. once you've merely been married for some months yet have dated for style of a three hundred and sixty 5 days and 1/2 his father and mom do not have an project with the marriage. further better in the adventure that they did, does it truly remember if he loves you? you've each and every of the information you want authentic in the front of you. do not enable your love for him blind you to the very genuine betrayals that are taking position. If he loves you want he says he does he does no longer below any circumstances take in with those different lady no matter if it truly is merely by e mail/textual content or seeing them in man or woman. Take this example heavily and look at how your existence is going to play out in years yet to go back. contained in the couple of minutes period you'd be able to inform your self that you'll get via it and that is going to artwork. you could not do all of it your self. there would should be one hundred% attempt on both ends and from what you've reported apparently like he has already bailed out on you. I choose you the finest of success!

2016-12-06 07:53:11 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

You need to weight the good and the bad. If its a repeated the scale weighs more to the leave him side but if the he's been a good father to his kids or it was a night out type situation where he lost control, well you need to do some talking over and maybe seek advice from a prof. Weigh him up and if the bad outweighs the good, drop him: )

2006-09-28 06:37:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

This happened to me and I felt like the world had ended. However I pulled myself together, got a divorce and I have never looked back.

I met a wonderful man 9 years ago and we have a great relationship with two wonderful children.

So my answer to your question is get rid of him, dust yourself off and start all over again, your soul mate is still waiting.

2006-09-28 06:38:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

It is very difficult to answer this question, something only a counselor could answer, we don't know your past in the relationship, we don't know what kind of cheating and lieing, was it wiht money another girl? We don't know him as a person, we don't know what you contributed to the situation, my advice, get counseling

2006-09-28 06:37:16 · answer #7 · answered by Barbara C 6 · 0 0

Counseling

2006-09-28 06:35:11 · answer #8 · answered by Pimp E 3 · 0 0

only you can answer that.i knew my ex-husband had been up to something but wasn,t sure how far he,d gone,so i rubbed itching powder inside the button bit of his boxers and waited for him to ask me if i,d changed the washing powder,he didn,t say a word but a noticed him having a sly itch,i stayed with him but split up a year later because i couldn,t deal with it,i kept checking his pockets and his phone can,t live like that ,it does your head in.

2006-09-28 06:49:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

i wouldn't put up with that, my dad did that to my mom and she was extremly misserable for years cause of what happend. if i were in your situation ya i know i married the guy i thought i'd spend the rest of my life with but if he wants to go out with someother whore then thats his choice. your too good for that and you can have someone tons better.

2006-09-28 06:40:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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