English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

my husband is very male chauvinist ans i dont know how to deal with it. Its either his way orhe will hit me and i told him one more time and Im gone but I love him to much to leave. what should I do? im scared he will end up really hurting me one day

2006-09-28 02:43:53 · 14 answers · asked by vegasgirl182005 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

14 answers

A man's love for you should never be based on Fear or Intimidation.

Love is not fear, it is faith.
Love is not dominance, it is working together.
Love is not denial, it is acceptance.
Love is not ugly, it is Grace and beauty!
Love is not War and Hate, it is Peace!
Love is not imprisonment, it is Freedom!

Abusive relationships never get better on their own. The abuse only escalates!

2006-09-28 03:23:19 · answer #1 · answered by ? 1 · 1 0

First of all, your husband may be a male chauvinist, but he is also a wife abuser. I pray that you do not have children with this man, but if you do, you need to get out not only for yourself, but for them. You have something that most abused women have, a co-dependent need to stay with that person even though they hurt you. This isn't love, this is fear of being alone. Most likely by this point, you've also been emotionally abused to the point where you have begun to rationalize every time he hits you. You need to leave now and then please, PLEASE get some therapy to work on why you would allow someone to treat you this way. You may also need to file a restraining order to keep him away. I will say a prayer for you and I hope you will listen to this advice. This situation is not going to get better, abuse usually escalates.

2006-09-28 03:03:56 · answer #2 · answered by Kelly S 3 · 0 0

u love a man that treats u like crap and hits u???? now does that make sense to u??? NO! the reason u "THINK" u love him is because he tricked u into loving him so he could control u and abuse you.. and he has u so screwed up mentally that u "THINK" u love him..How do i know this? cause i use to be in an mentally/physically abusive relationship.. He is going to hurt u, he already has.. wake up.. i know ur smarter then this.. Time to get ur life back, i know i know, u want him to get better, u think one day he's going to miraculously just wake up and realize what he's doing to u.. WELL HE"S NOT TILL U SHOW HIM WHAT HES GOING TO LOSE IF EVEN THEN.. u need to file a "family order of protection" this is a restraining order against him they will force him to get therapy to try and solve his issues.. and u need therapy to resolve ur issues of thinking being treated like a punching bag emotionally and physically is LOVE.. its NOT!!!!!!!..hes not going to change.. and even if he does it wont be untill u force his hand into it.. as long as he can continue to treat u like dirt he's going to.. why?????? because u dont scare him, and all he has to do is be sweet after and say he's sorry and ur right back letting him do it again.. so why should he change he gets to have the power trip , the ego gradification, and hes so miserable about himself.. that he gets to beat u up emotionally and physically to make him feel better about himself....So u have 2 choices.. SHUT UP AND PUT UP.. or DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.. sorry its harsh, but its a harsh situation ur in.. and u cant make him change unless u get someone or something to back u up.. that means the family protection order, he will have to leave the house for so many months till he gets his act together and if he comes with in so many ft of u , u call the cops.. and they will arrest him.. i know u dont want that to happen , BUT HE NEEDS HELP.. and they will MAKE HIM GET HELP.. and u need some time away from him to get ur act together before u actually start believing this is a "GOOD LIFE" ITS NOT..

2006-09-28 02:53:58 · answer #3 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0 0

Was he like this before you married him? I hate male chauvinist. You should of saw this before you married him. It seems like he needs some angry management classes. Just leave him for a couple of days and see what he does. When you come back and if he beats you then you better pack up and go for good. Nobody deserves this kind of treatment!! I feel for you. If a man ever laid a hand on me it would be the last time that's for sure! Good luck and God bless!

2006-09-28 02:52:13 · answer #4 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 0 1

ok you say you love him or is this a habbit cuz its familiar or because your scared what lies ahead if you leave him !!
listen what do you love about him when he hits you in the face or socks you in the belly !! how can you love a man like that ..what aboout him do you love or is it the dream and imagination of a beautyful marriage ? its all a illusion!! all of it ! its what you wish for or how you remember your first months to be !1
but this is not love ! he loves himself !! and not you and even if he did love you then he has a severe problem and only by you leaving him untill he gets help will it help !! if you dont hell keep doing it cuz he knows your there ! he does not fear!
and if he threatens if you leave then he is truly a selfish self loving man that does not care about you ..because if he cared he would be ascared of hurting you ..so you need to leave now and get out of the situation !! if you want tell him youll wait for him to get help and promise him you wont see anyone !!
but you need to i repeat get out ..men who hit woman are mad at themselves or someone else and not man enough to handle things emotionally.. i have been in the situation and all the sorry's in the world will not change him he WILL do it again and while time goes by and he feels more secure you wont leave by tellin you hell beat you the beatings will get worse ..
and i dont even want to think if you have kids

OH NO WAY FOR NO REASON EVER SHOULD A MAN HIT A WOMAN ..I DONT CARE IF YOUR IN BED WITH THE MILK MAN .. A REAL MAN WILL WALK AWAY AND DEAL WITH IT !!!! NEVER LET HIM HIT YOU AGAIN BE WOMAN ENOUGH LOVE YOUR SELF AND RESPECT YOUR SELF ENOUGH TO TELL HIM I DONT THINK SO AND DONT SAY 'ONE MORE TIME " CUZ THEYLL ALWAYS BE ANOTHER ..PLEASE LEAVE NOW THIS IS NOT LOVE OR HAPPINESS!! ask your self again
now in the present what do you love about him NO LOVED PAST TENSE ITS GONE ! now ~!!! because hes good in bed **** alot of men can do that .but it takes a real man to love and respect a woman as he would himself
it says so in the bible too love your wife as one as your queen !! and i dont think ppl beat queens !! mm think on it honey ok !! love your self !!! leave !!

2006-09-28 02:54:29 · answer #5 · answered by Brandy 2 · 0 0

If you fear for your life then you must leave. There are many shealters for abused women, hotlines and special homes. If you have family let them know what is happening also social sevrvices. Use your network of friends, coworkers and family to help you get out of this.

Too often a woman will stay out of fear, the sad fact is that most women are killed by their partners. Please get home soon.

2006-09-28 02:48:43 · answer #6 · answered by DutchApplePie 4 · 0 0

http://wedirectyou.com/womennmr/women.htm

The above link is a directory for battered womens shelters and support groups. Don't wait for him to hit you again, leave while you still can. You could wind up dead or seriously injured, he has a problem, and at current you do as well. You need to get help, and its nothing to be ashamed of, I don't know if you have children but if you do it is dangerous for them as well. Contact thes shelter and they will help you and you can get better. Dont fear him just get out.

2006-09-28 02:54:48 · answer #7 · answered by Harley 3 · 0 0

i know you don't wanna leave him... but you will have to do it just once.. even if for a day or 2... coz unless you do, he wont stop and you'll end up losing him or your own life forever.. what's the point of such love if you won't be alive to feel it? not much, is there? you need to speak to someone close to you about it and get some help.... and drag him for some counselling

2006-09-28 02:46:52 · answer #8 · answered by conspicuous 5 · 0 0

Don't walk.....RUN if he hits you. Your story is the same as most abused women. BUT I LOVE HIM........
Love does not hurt. If he loved you he would not ever lay a hand on you. There is someone out there that would treat you right.

2006-09-28 02:47:51 · answer #9 · answered by saved_by_grace 7 · 1 0

If you let someone hit you then you do whatever you want. WHY would you let someone do that and claim you love them????? Makes no sense and neither does this question...if you really don't know what to do then nothing you learn here will help

2006-09-28 02:47:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

fedest.com, questions and answers