how do i gain confidence?

Question

i am really shy when it comes to people i cant really talk to them and feel they are talking about me. i seem to be fine when i had a drink but still dont really give eye contact how do i gain the confidence i need?

Answer 1

Start chatting in front of small groups at some sort of organised community event.

Make some tough choices in your own private life or with friends that you've been putting off. Even if you make the wrong choice, you'll feel empowered for having done so.

You've already identified your problem and are probably smart enough to know that if you don't speak up now, life will pass you by. You will be a sad lonely person unless you shape up.

Answer 2

i was like that really about a year ago u cant tell what a year can do to you confidence is a big word i tell u that confidence is a mood some times u r some times ur not even the most famus persons if the r honest they will tell u that. but u can improve ur confidence mood by some means like:
act normally be ur self dont over react or make up feelings u dont feel always be calm if u get confused just take a deep brith it will really help calming u down tell u have a grip upon ur self and finally resbonsibility find any thing that u would be resbonsible of it a jop a pit any thing fill ur time workout all that help improving confidence ....... hope i was able 2 help.

Answer 3

I use to be very shy and not say a word hardly to anyone, never made eye contact either because I felt I was staring at them. I was blessed with a good mother whom taught me that you have to look at people other wise they think you are a snob. You need to gain your confidence in little bits, confidence just can not be grown overnight. Lets take looking at people for example, I first started to lift my head up and look at forcus on something behind the person, then the next week I set myself the new task of looking at the persons third eye in the middle of their forhead, week after that I started looking at their face changing my eyes line from their eyes to their mouth and from their I started to look into people eyes. Second of all believe in yourself, I spent too much time worrying about what to say to people and how they will react, if the people are strangers then they do not know your anything about you, they are more interested with their own lives and you have got a good thing going for you, you a a good listerner, all quite people are and this will make people like you as you are not interupting them in conversation,. What I did when I met new people at college, work courses etc where I did not know anybody is just pick out someone, don't spend much time thinking who and what you are going to say, just go up and smile and say hello the person chance to say hello back, you can not lose with a smile and hello and you don't even need to think about a whole converstation just go with the flow after that. I know what you are thinking, what if the person just says hello back, I am stuck aren't I what do I say after that, I always try to compliment a person it works wonders, for example Hi I just noticed how nice your jacket was can you tell me where you brought it from. You'll find it is the perfect ice breaker. I know it iis hard to go up to people whom you don't know and say hello, I know how you get butterflies in your tummy, my words use to come out all in a muddle and back to front when I first started, but I made a joke about it saying sorry fogot to put my teeth in today. A wise friend said to me strangers are just friends we do not know yet, there is only one of you in the world whom has lived your life, the art of conversation is just to share your life experience. Just remember to be yourself and don't get to hung up on what to say, once you break the ice it will be a lot easier and you will be suprised how the conversation flows. Once you start talking to strangers it will become more and more natural and then it will not bother you so much anymore.

I hope this helps good luck.

Answer 4

The best way I've found when dealing with people who might intimidate you a little is to imagine them in a compromising position. for example, imagine them sitting on the toilet and they never seem as intimidating again.

You should also check out the book "The magic of thinking big" by David J Schwartz.

Answer 5

you are just as good as anyone else ,people can only intimidate you if you let them (said that already this morning) also smile at people most people will smile back at you, maybe giving you the opportunity to say hi, this will make you feel good and you will start feeling more confident

Answer 6

Start off with just being open with people. Talk about things of interest to you, and share stories and experiences. When people see the friendliness they will open up to you and relate to what you're talking about. Good luck from there!

Answer 7

Become an alcoholic. Shy people lose their shyness after a few drinks.

Answer 8

Kickboxing..That Way You Wont Feel Intimidated When You Face Someone ;) I Teach It........LoL

Answer 9

Practice. Face your demons. I can stare you in the eyes and bold face lie! One of my sons can do the same but the other is like his mother and can't lie worth a damn!

Answer 10

Just stop caring what people thing, if their ur friends they will just joke around if u say something stupid and if its someone random well f**k them as you will probably never see them again.