My ex wants to stay friends and "like to call late at night, and ask if he can come over" plus he says he still likes me but i called him and heard some girls in the back. this guy i am dating well we were suppose to go out tonight he shows up on the phone with his windows rolled up and lip saying hold on i stand there for a minute and then well he's still busy i turn around go sit on my porch 10 mins roll by then i go inside he calls me 30mins later i dont answer
Well every guy i seem to date... is already involved and i find out later... it really sucks... i think dating is horrible... but i cant seem to find a boyfriend who is faithful and a good person....
2006-09-27 18:37:55 · 21 answers · asked by thought 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Now that porch scene was really bad. Kick his butt to the curb. But having said that, finding a decent guy shouldnt be a problem provided you keep few things in mind:
1) Always date more than one guy at a time in the initial stages.
2) Never act desperate around a guy.
3) If you dont like something abt something he has done, go ahead and create a huge scene. Dont try to act all "understanding and sweet".
4)Be considerate of your needs as well.
5) Always act emotionally secure by giving attention but not dropping everything to just be with him.
Try these, and once you have attracted the right person, remember you must always come first. Love him, care for him but never compromise on your needs to satisfy him.
2006-09-27 18:49:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
a lot of it has to do with who you are dating. not that fact of dating itself. you just need to find an unattached guy that has the same view on dating and expectations as you do. Don't say you want a relationship right off the bat unless you want to. At least it would get rid of any guys who aren't serious enough for that. But just say you'd like to date someone with the possibility of something more. And someone who isn't on the rebound. Find that stuff out on the first date. It's important. I know most people don't talk about serious stuff the first date, but that's a major reason why so many relationships don't work out because people just have fun and then sooner or later you find out they are seeing someone else or they don't want a relationship, and many other things. It's better in the long rong if you put everything on the table. You won't get heart as much. People just see this as a stupid idea. But I actually think it's very smart. Why get into a relationship that isn't right for either of you and end up realizing it a year or more down the road.
2006-09-28 01:43:14 · answer #2 · answered by Mel 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No--it isn't you at all...there are a lot of awful men out there...I met a whole lot of men on a chatline and these were the ones I thought were the cream of the crop, I talked to them a long time before meeting most of them and rejected many due to things they said or clues I got...even so, the men I picked as good ones ---they invariably turned out to be liars, players, game-players, attached, etc. I guess they were just adept at lying.
I'd say only 1-2% or less were really decent people--the only truly sweet, nice, and considerate one I met died a year after I met him. He was a gem!
This experience that went on several years really changed my perception of men...I personally just quit dating and don't miss it at all (except for kissing and cuddling maybe).
But then again, I was married 17 years and already had my kids which is --I now believe --the main reason I needed men...I hate to say this and I feel bad for the decent guys who get hurt by the awful men ruining the women, but ..now when I hear stuff from men, I think..yeah, I heard that before and think it's a line.
It's too bad as I have so many good traits and am a really decent woman with a beautiful personality who is told that all the time and hundreds of people had said to me that I am nice, funny, sweet, easy to talk to, down to earth and interesting.
I am faithful, spiritual, educated, smart, sensuous, creative, tenderhearted, thoughtful, easy to be around, etc..and many other good traits (and some bad ones too of course)..but no man will ever benefit from them as I am off the market for good due to over 100 bad experiences.
There are good men but they are hard to find and getting harder to find now than ever before...don't even waste your time with those like the ones you mention...as time is precious and we can't get it back..
It's hard to be lonely, alone, or leave people but the more you do it, the easier it gets..and putting up with a bunch of jerks is hard too.
Work on yourself, put meaning into your life, find some causes and forget about men for a while.
Develop yourself to be the best you can be, become close to God, pray for a good man and be patient.
Maybe try to go for men who are geeks or unattractive or not that lucky with girls or poor as you may find a man worth having here.
2006-09-28 01:59:48 · answer #3 · answered by shaney j 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should try a different type of guy than you usually go for. Dating can be good and not all guys are like that.
Maybe I have just been lucky but I never had problems like that with any of my dates but if I did there wouldn't have been a 2nd date.
Dumb all these guys and go out and find yourself a new and improved bunch. They're out there, you just have to look.
2006-09-28 01:44:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive had the same type of problems with the girls that Ive been dating. Im about to give up myself. cant find a good girl that isnt taken or who has had so many problem guys in the past that they just wont give me a chance to prove myself. Ive always been a gentelmen, they think that Im faking it, and always seem to think that Im after only one thing, sex. I'll admit that is important, but not the only thing in a relationship. I'm looking for a long term lasting loving relationship, with good sex. I dont think there is anything wront with that. What do we do next..I've been thinking of joining one of those on line dating sites just to see if that is where the good girls might be hiding out. What do you think we should do....
2006-09-28 01:44:54 · answer #5 · answered by wizzard 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well that guy was definitely a jacka$$ who you are better off without.
And yeah, dating is hurtful and deceptive, because there are so many people playing games out there. The best thing to do is to 'give up' looking, and just live your life. They seem to come out of the woodwork when you aren't looking. Better luck to ya sweetie.
2006-09-28 01:42:41 · answer #6 · answered by smallweed 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love is the answer to everything. All you ever need is love,
communication and understanding. That's what I figured out so
far. If you are down, you need to get up and start doing something with
your life. Don't need to be shy, be straight forward and allways say what
you want and expect from the others.
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2006-09-28 01:52:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
All relationships can be hurtful some times people try so hard they scar them off or the other person knows that they can do anything to you and you will put up with it.It is best to keep guide lines to relationships with EX s .
2006-09-28 01:49:39 · answer #8 · answered by janelle p 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps your problem is that you choose to be friends with popular guys who easily make friends with girls and who don't value their girlfriends too much.
Make friends with a shy guy who has some difficulty meeting girls. And you won't have any problem with him cheating on you with other girls.
A shy guy can be just as good of a friend as any other guy, once he gets to know you well. Shy people are shy only with strangers. Once a shy guy gets to know you well, then he will begin to behave normally with you.
2006-09-28 01:54:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not take any BS from any guy. If he really likes you and wants to be your BF they will not stand you up. If you already ended up with a boyfriend that is it, do not let him use you or abuse you you are better that that. Have dignity and just forget about him. there are plenty of fish in the water.
2006-09-28 01:42:36 · answer #10 · answered by mazinger4 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋