how can you get your self esteem back when you've been played like a fiddle by someone I thought really loved me. HE REALLY FOOLED ME.
2006-09-27 16:54:56 · 29 answers · asked by Joyous Dawn in the morning 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I'd like to thank each and everyone of you that supported me with your answers, they are all great, supporting, and caring its amazing as to how people will come to your aid when your down and out. My feeling on mankind has been restored by your supportive answers, thank you again.
2006-09-27 17:35:06 · update #1
nah ur not dumb some of us men are just assholes is all
2006-09-27 16:56:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Look at the calender and mark off a day towards the end of the week. Three days away from today max.
Allow yourself the time between now and that day to be angry and bitter and get it all out of your system. Find one or two good friends to share your thoughts with. Don't use this time to run around slandering the guy though. He'll get his when his time comes.
Towards the end of that "anger time" youll have come to some realizations about what you should have seen but didn't, things you should have asked about... remember them, and use those things next time.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm 33 and it still happens from time to time.
2006-09-27 17:00:37 · answer #2 · answered by The Jeep Pilot 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey it's going to be okay. It's happened to so many people--you're not the only one. What is good about the situation is that you can move on to a winner, and not another jerk. You deserve to be with someone who truly cares about you. Sometimes boys mess with girls because they are not mature enough to handle a relationship or they do it because they want physical things in a relationship.
Just know that you are a great girl and you deserve a great guy. Don't settle for anything less than the best! Chin up!
2006-09-27 19:10:15 · answer #3 · answered by Mimi Kitty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you must really down right now and that telling you that "it will pass" doesn't make you feel better but really it will. In the mean time do things that make you feel better about your self. Maybe you can volunteer at a preschool, hospital children's ward, library to read to kids or illiterate people or even your local dog shelter. Joining clubs that offer things you like book clubs (if you like reading. The idea is to get out, make friends, before you know it HE will be a distant memory, Good luck and have fun, you are worth it.
2006-09-27 17:12:42 · answer #4 · answered by yvonne t 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simple Solution... as in accordance with SunTzu Phylosophy of war......
Solution 1
Follow as Planned and put in your trick.
Results : End of the day, both of you will have no return
Solution 2
Silent is your best answer and companion
Results : You will gain respect in future, but in short time you won't be fooled by he / she
Solution 3
Avoid, remain silent and wait for oppurtunity to fool him/her back.
Results : You will regain your pride in 1 day and everybody will scare of you
Solution 4
Take Action and scold he/she.
Results : Public embarrasment
Solution 5
Influence he/her closest companion and spread words on he/she
Good luck. Well, again it is also depending your characteristic whether to choose which solution as suggested above. Well, i guess whatever you are doing right now, is fall back to the solution above
2006-09-27 17:13:43 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. Logic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think we've all been here. So be gentle with yourself. All I do is learn, learn, learn. Then I go get with people. I'm alone a lot to learn. Some people like to stay busy. Just remember, it was his Loss. He was the Fool. You know how good you are. Hold on to that. I like to think we build ourselves up, and build each other up. You can use this time for yourself. I'm selfish, and I relish time with myself. Society acts as if, to be alone were a disease. I don't have a problem with it. I like me. You can learn to love yourself you know. I don't complain about my X's because I learned something from all of them. So just learn from it. And let it go, move on to whatever else interest you. It doesn't have to be a guy either, it's a big world out there.
2006-09-27 17:06:21 · answer #6 · answered by noface 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you take the thoughts of him and flush them down the toilet. You must learn that you are wasting your time if you let other people affect how you feel about yourself. Remind yourself that atleast you don't have to put up with his crap anymore. It could have been worse. You're a beautiful person with a lot to offer. We all are beautiful with a lot to offer, you just have to believe in yourself. Appreciate what you have, appreciate your family, appreciate your true friends. Look deep inside and realize you have the strength to overcome anything and then ask yourself what do you really want out of life?? Find out what really makes you happy and go after it!!!!!!!!! If you need anymore motivation email me because I have tons of more for you to consider. Good Luck and you will be fine. I believe in you and I don't even know you...
2006-09-27 17:02:40 · answer #7 · answered by danny_austin4 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well, best way is to just let it go.
You can't control him, you can't control anyone but yourself. You can control how much you think about him. You can take the initiative and hang out with people you like. you can realize that you're young, and when you are young love isn't what you think it is- so while it hurts desperately, it's purely something you need to go through to mature into an adult. There will be many many more boys and guys and men in your life. He wasn't the only one and he obviously isn't the one for you. no matter how much you may have wanted him to be.
Believe me, I've been through the gamut of guys who have taken advantage of my good nature, and my openess- I've even been in a relationship with a man who was married and I have no idea he was married... think about how that must have felt- but how did I move past it or get back my self confidence? I realized that it wasn't me who was in the fault, but him for being dishonest. I got up and did things I wanted to do and things that made me feel better. One thing is to get out with friends or family and do activities you enjoy as not to dwell on thinking about what he did to you or how that made you feel.
You already know how it made you feel- so what purpose does it serve to go over and over it?
2006-09-27 17:00:57 · answer #8 · answered by Noelle 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well actually something inside you decided that you needed it to learn something from that. You should not dwell in the past. Just do your best in the present. See this site to help your self-esteem. He did not really fool you. You fooled yourself so you could learn from it. If you don't learn what you need to learn then you will need to repeat it again and again and again and again and again.
http://phifoundation.org/happiness.html
2006-09-27 17:23:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go read Gone With The Wind
2006-09-27 17:00:58 · answer #10 · answered by person 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to realize that he is just a guy and only you can allow someone to make you feel worthless. You always need to remain in control of the relationship. My father once told me that women are in control and women only let men think they are the boss to build a man's self-esteem.
2006-09-27 16:59:38 · answer #11 · answered by Miss. Tee98 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋