I just graduated from college and am home for a while taking care of my parents and our house and my teenage sister. Now that I'm home I see just how babied she has been as the youngest of four, and I'm so frustrated with her lack of responsibilities! She does not clean her room or do her laundry even if she is down to one outfit and has to wear it dirty for a week she will not bring herself to get off the computer and do some laundry! I did 5 loads for her and washed two more and said all she had to do was hang up those two loads, it has been a month and those clothes (clean) are now all over her floor, never having made it to the closet. I said I would get her new clothes (she needs them desperatley, all those clothes we washed are way too small for her now) once she proves to me she can take care of them, aka, do her laundry and hang them up.
I am not allowed to take away priveledges or discipline her, what more can I do?! I want the best for her!
2006-09-27 15:16:58 · 7 answers · asked by jlsherma1213 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Bless your heart, I totally understand what you are going through. I have a 16-year-old sister, and my mom was disabled 5 years ago. My step-dad refuses to discipline my little sister because he is used to always being her buddy.
A lot of not wanting to do laundry, etc., is normal teenage behavior. As a mom, as hard as it is to follow through, I feel like the only thing that works as far as discipline goes is letting them experience the consequences of their behavior (as long as the result isn't physically dangerous). It seems like a lot of her "neglectful" behavior stems from computer use, so I would seriously try to persuade your parents to see the connection between distractions (i.e. computer use) and not doing her chores. Then, it will be easier to say if you don't do your chores, the computer will be unplugged. Normally, I'd say let her see what happens when no one is around to wash her clohtes, but she seems to not care (just like my sister!). The only other thing I can think of is confiscating any dirty clothes left on the floor and not washed (after warning her that this will be the consequence), and either giving them away or putting them away until she can earn them back with more responsible behavior.
Has something happened that is preventing your parents from taking care of your younger sister? That can be a very stressful situation for the whole family. What are your sister's grades like? Are these also being neglected for other pursuits? You somehow have to make your parents see that teaching your sister to take responsibility for her own actions and holding her to a standard of behavior is the only way to prepare her to live in and be successful in the real world (one of the main goals of parenting). Best of luck to you!!!
2006-09-27 17:50:48 · answer #1 · answered by cutiemamaof3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a spoilt bro just like ur sis. He is not only the youngest, but the laziest n most rebellious of us all. We always end up quarrelling if i complaint y he dun tidy his room, y play game all night n y he take bath once every few days etc... Teribble huh?
Well, i feel quite tired of being the big sister n busy with my own life, so just let him have his way...
Now he is 21 n after went to boarding college, i felt he changed for the better n became more mature n hygienic. He still loves games but when assignments comes, he would finish up n even brags to everyone when he sometimes get good results.
I guess ur sis will figure out how to live her life the best. You n other family members just watch over her from a not-so-far distance n only bug her when she involve herself in dangerous things like smoking, drugs, skip classes etc. I guess tat would make life better for u n her. Cheers to being big sister ;)
2006-09-27 22:44:22 · answer #2 · answered by fify 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep in mind that teenagers will be teenagers. Since you are showing her on how to be a responsible adult, continue to do that. You could also talk to your parents about her as well. Although you might not even know it, she already looks up to you. Continue to be a positive role model. Talk to your sister. Tell her how you really feel- your frustration on not keeping her room clean, doing her own laundry, etc. Be her big sister and since she might not appreciate it now, she will thank you later.
2006-09-28 00:33:19 · answer #3 · answered by Lady S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a teenage sister myself and my best advice to you is step in as second in comand. Let your parents know that she needs to be more responsible for her share of the house work, and if your parents don't agree or don't want to hear you at all remember that they're the parents and they are responsible for her. You're not.
2006-09-27 23:07:37 · answer #4 · answered by sexylips 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
see u are doing whats best for her she just doesn`t want any help see do it like this give her something she really wants tell her to keep up with it if she loes it she not resonsible or talk to mom and dad in private a see if the can punish her :)
2006-09-27 23:08:42 · answer #5 · answered by rainbows_r_for_eva 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't teach her, show her, by setting the example.. Although it sounds like your already doing this.
2006-09-27 22:57:02 · answer #6 · answered by Little_Lilth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your not her mother. Let her be a teenager .
2006-09-27 22:20:00 · answer #7 · answered by jassy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋