I am a young African American. Why is it that because I speak "proper" English, most blacks say I am white?

Question

I was rasied in a great home, & my parents rasied me well. I am now 18 going to college, and I still get hit with this all the time. I speak english like everyone else. I don't understand just because I don't speak "ebonics" I am also cateorgized as being white or a white girl. I am not overtly trying to at all just doing what I was tought it school and at home. I think it is so sad that so many African Americans these days are like that. When they complain about oh the "white man" this or that I go crazy! They expect to have all these things and to get so far in life by talking aye yo cuz, or any other crap they are speaking. And when they don't they go and blame the white man! I don't see why they can not just change there mentalitly, & maybe they could get somewhere in life. When I hear associates of mine saying yeah I didn't get that job. I die inside(HELLO MAYBE U SHOULD HAVE PULLED YOUR PANTS UP!). Maybe it is just me and I am running my mouth about nothing, but what do U think?

Answer 1

I think you answered your own question. You don't fit the "mold" of the typical black lady, so they put you into the "white person" mold. You are one of "them" so therefore a threat. But I agree with you 100%! Pull your pants up when you come in for a job, don't wear your flashy "bling," and don't speak to an employer as if he/she were your friend back home.

Answer 2

I wish you would write Tyra Banks about this situation. According to her life history, as she speaks of on her shows, she has been through the same thing.
Me? I am a white female, and I work with alot of AA at work. I have asked them the same thing , such as why do they say, where i stay' instead of 'where i live', the younger ones esp. get offended-but they know i love a debate. I also have asked why do they feel since I am white that i am somehow responisble for the slave issue that happened so many years ago. I was not there, and I had nothing to do with it. They also have told me they feel they do not get advancements because of being AA. I debate back that they could go to school and get a education to be eligible for advancement-but they still seem to feel they are being mistreated somehow. I just can not get it, and probably never will. In 30 more years the minorities, the AA and the Latinos will be the majority in the US, this is a fact. Will the tables turn then to the minority of the caucasians, doubtfully. Another thing that irritates me is the strong connection they seem to share to their motherland, their roots, and not the first one can tell you how their government works, who are the leaders or any thing about Africa. I have been officially dubbed with the title of mixed-since I love to debate with them and since my ancestors were a mix of spanish hugeonots and english and french, I have olive skin......

Answer 3

Hi Alexci,

There are alot of statistics out there that state blacks feel more comfortable around their peers who act and speak as they do. I grew up in NYC and hung with a racially mixed crowd. Asians, Italians, Blacks, Indians all feel the same way you do but overcame their frustration by not caring what their so-called peers said. Any race who feels inferior and resents their own for being raised in an open minded home is just jealous and frustrated themselves. They are relying on what other people think of them rather than what they feel and know is right. My suggestion is to find a better class of people to associate with. They are the ones that won't ask you why you speak they way you do, or any other questions you may find offensive. I know for a fact they are out there. Maybe it's time to change your environment. I did and nobody asks me anymore (very few and definitely not anyone I would consider a friend) why I don't talk the way they would expect me to considering my background. I hope you continue to analyse the intent behind the question. You will find out more than you realize. If you feel like checking out this site, it says it more eloquently than I. I welcome any correspondence from you.

Respectfully,
Otter
http://www.blackprof.com/archives/2006/07/black_on_black_violence_as_a_h.html

Answer 4

No; I think you're right. That doesn't happen to me often, but I HATE that mentality. It just shows how ignorant a person is when he categorizes the right way to speak English as "white." As if you could assign a color to using proper grammar! I'm also fed up with this "ebonics" garbage. Slang is not a separate language, and it shouldn't be treated as such. Some of the people who speak slang don't do it out of convenience, but because they think they're cool or rebelling from the "white man," who is supposedly keeping them back from doing whatever they want to do. Hello? Civil rights movement? Racial equality? Idiots. The only reason their minds appear to be stuck in the postslavery era is because they want an excuse for their laziness. That's what doesn't get them anywhere. They attempt to excuse their inexcusable indolence.
That stupid way of thinking makes me angry. As for me, I love grammar and proper English, and I'm going to keep writing and speaking both.

Answer 5

Unfortunately there is a tendancy for people to conflate language and culture. What I believe you are referencing is the phenomenon known as the "accent bar", the invisible judgement made relating to a person's inherently developed form of pronunciation.

In academic writing this is often referenced as being "top down", in that some minority accents are often a bar to well paying jobs and lifestyles. But this situation is more "bottom up". This is not meant to downplay the relevance of ebonics or other minority language structures, but in the strata of accents the scale is slanted towards the white upper-class, wherever you are on Earth.

There are many documented cases of such a situation in India and other places of ex-colonial Asia, where 'educated' people native to that area were shunned from both their peers, who viewed them as sell-outs, and the ruling white class who didn't seem them as being "one of us".

The role of language is as a means of communication, and accent is fruitful variation to be celebrated.

Be proud of how you speak: it is one instant expression of who you are as a person. It at once gives the listener a wealth of information about your background and personality. Some people try to hide how they naturally want to speak, and many accents can be "put on" by those wishing to join a particualr language community.

Respect the way you speak, and use it to your advantage. While it is sad but true, a "proper" accent will open more doors for you than it will close.

Answer 6

Be proud of your education and your speech. At least I would understand you I would assume if we had a conversation together. Another thing I do not get. Why is every Black person in this country African American? 99% of the Black people have never been to Africa let alone have decendents from there. I have Indian blood in me, but do not call myself Native American. I also have Irish in me, but am not Irish. I'm just a poor white boy. You go girl.

Answer 7

That is too bad that you take such criticism for speaking proper english. It is only their immaturity talking, nothing more. I remember when I was in my 20's and kind of a rebel. I didn't want to conform to some set of standards, and I had a lot of trouble succeeding in life or having people respect me. I thought I was owed respect because I was smart.

That is immaturity.

Mature people realize that to succeed, to be taken seriously, there are certain things everyone has to conform to. Speaking proper english is one of these things. I eventually figured out that how I spoke and carried myself DO matter.

The reason you get criticized is because these people are immature and refuse to compromise and conform to the standards of professionalism and maturity that is called for if you want respect and success. These people who criticize are also too lazy to put in the work it takes to change. They will never be successful and will always blame it on the white man because it is easier to do that than take the blame themselves.

Good luck, you sound like a really smart, confident woman!

Answer 8

I don't see anything wrong with you speaking proper english. I'm not black, but i will say this. Just ignore them. You have a job and going to college. You'll be better off in the long run. Besides you don't have to prove your blackness by talking or acting a certain way. I'm pretty sure anybody that looks at you will know your black. Soo keep on keeping it real and do what's best for yourself.

Answer 9

My daughter has the same issue with people saying the same thing to her. Because I pride myself on the way she talks and you should to. We do not have to sound ghetto all the time and it should not be expected from your peers. Keep doing and talking like you are and I betcha you get that great job and rewards that you are looking for and remember life is too short to think about whats other AA thinks is right or wrong...just know within yourself that you are born to succeed and you will no matter how you sound. Good grammar is never overlooked by those that respect what you are doing and being yourself. You go girl!!!

Answer 10

I'm African-American and know how you feel. The thing is, you should find new friends. I haven't experienced people labeling me something else in a long time because I only surround myself around people who fit or understand my personality, values, interests, and insights. Whomever you surround yourself around is whom you will develop into. The way they view things is so low-minded that the last time I thought that way was in Elementary school. There is a whole new world of friends and I believe you are holding yourself back by hanging with people whom you have outgrown. You are hanging with the wrong group, I go to a predominately white college so I know you want to hang with people like you, but their are more people who are probably more like you then the people you are with now. You will find a new friends, but if you don't let go of these you may always feel out of place and abnormal. Its time to move on, I don't even speak to or look at people who think that way.

On the other hand, sometimes people tease to show affection
and acceptance. they also tease and point out an attribute of yours to help you find yourself.

If you feel comfortable and feel you belong stay with the group.
If you feel like you don't belong and you have nothing in common with them, its time to move on to spare yourself the lost of spirituality and growth.