My husband and I just got married last month. He wants me change my last name to his last name only and not my name hyphen his name. Before we got married he did say that he would want my last name to be changed. However, I also told him that I wanted my correct last name and hyphenated his last name. He even gave me an ultimatum on our marriage concerning this. What should I do?
2006-09-27 11:53:22 · 5 answers · asked by shortyred7998 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
that doesnt sound nice of him! why would he give you an ultimatum over such a trivial thing, it's your name it was your name before he came along, so you should be able to keep it. I know I'll keep mine and have my name and his hyphenated. he sounds quite possessive, it has been argued by feminists that when a woman take on a man's name, it's like she belongs to him, well i dont argree with that as i believe we are all equal. i think you should convey that message to him that we are all equal as individuals and within a marital relationship, unless he thinks otherwise. is it part of his culture to want you to do that otherwise he may not feel like he has a woman for him? or for prestige or something due to culture or just old fashioned way of thinking? also tell him or ask him whether he loves you or not otherwise why did you both get married in the first place? also ask him just because of him not respecting your wishes he's prepared to throw your marriage away because of something so trivial? unless it was not a serious threat. ask him why does it matter so much to him that he is making it an issue, as at the end of the day both your love for each other won't change or die because of a name. i wish you the best of luck!
2006-09-27 12:06:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For one I know your not going to let something as little as last names break up your marriage!You got married because you love him and he loves you.You and him need to sit down and figure this out for real.If the both of you can't then its seems like a big problem.I know they say its problems in ever relationship but come on now some things can be solved if you want them to be.You knew how he felt about this before you got married,seems like you guys should of got that taken care of before being married.
2006-09-27 19:17:47 · answer #2 · answered by Stephanie P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what was the ultimatum? change it or I'll divorce you? If so, he's not good enough for you, and you can expect even bigger problems down the line. Be true to yourself. Good luck!
2006-09-27 19:00:48 · answer #3 · answered by mimi22 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you both work it out. he is giving you an ultimatum already...good luck
2006-09-27 19:08:44 · answer #4 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that either he want u to hyphen it and take it or not!
2006-09-27 19:03:34 · answer #5 · answered by tear drop 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋