my son is two and he doesn't listen to anything that i say he will do whatever his dad tells him to do but not me he thinks that when i get after him that it is funny i also have an 8 week old and it is hard trying to tame my two year old while holding my other son. what can i do to make him listen to me??????? PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-27 10:30:01 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Give your eight week old to your husband when you are talking with the two year old, and one thing you must do is always talk at the same level as your child, I do not mean in gibberish or baby talk, I mean eye to eye, don't stand over him and talk down to him, stand level or squat to be level and talk with (WITH) him and you will see better results, it may take a few days but you will be happy with the results.
2006-09-27 10:33:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
It's the same way with my 2 1/2 year old daughter...she'll listen to whatever "daddy says"...no fits or anything, but for me...well, she'll listen...but not all the time. I don't believe in spanking, so instead if she doesn't want to listen she gets a "timeout"...yes, it sounds silly or even stupid, but it's actually been working really well for me!!! At first she didn't want to sit in the timeout, but after being consistent and setting her back down every time she got up, she got the point. So, now when she doesn't want to listen, into a timeout she goes....when i put her in a timeout, i'll tell her why i'm putting her there (whether she's crying or not)...I only make her sit there for about 2 minutes (or until she calms down)...then when the time's up...i'll let her get up...after that she normally listens...
just an idea....
i thought about "sending her to her room"...but I didn't want her to hate going in there...lol I saw the "timeout method" on Nanny 911, laughed at first, then said to myself "hey if it works for her, maybe i can get it to work for me..." and it has!!
2006-09-27 20:18:25 · answer #2 · answered by BeautifulGirl79 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your 2-year old is obviously jealous of the new baby. I am experiencing the same thing. My daughter will be 2 on Friday and I have a 4 month old son. The daughter does things intentionally to gain attention.
They also learn if they do something wrong, sometimes they get more attention than if they are being good and listening to mommy.
Best of luck.
2006-09-27 17:39:16 · answer #3 · answered by stocks4allseasons 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he listens to your husband then do exactly what he's doing????????
Never shout and if your busy with a new baby then maybe your up and about all the time where as eight weeks a ago you may have been physically more on the same level as your two year old a suddenly your up and out of reach,,,, he may be trying to get your attention.
It'll all work out.
All the best.
2006-09-27 17:38:22 · answer #4 · answered by pixilated 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh for God's Sake.
Can't believe what people are writing here about hitting your kid.
Don't bloody do it. Look at the kind of the kid that you have. He sounds like a clever little thing. Mummy is bogged down with new babba, daddy isnt, mummy is more stressed, daddy doesnt have the same kind of stress maybe? ..therefore 'play mummy up'.
Look - just take a long hard look at your son's personality and review what has worked in the past. My 2 yr old adores 'opposites' at the moment. If I tell her 'you dont want to wear your coat today. No its too warm' she will do it. Its not about creating a spoiled brat - no way am I going to whack her until she agrees to wear her coat. Its all about me getting to know what makes her tick and what makes both of our lives easier.
Believe me, both me and my hubbie are hard-assed when it comes to bringing up kids who are respectful and not spoiled. What you need to do RIGHT NOW - is this; sit down with your hubbie - be frank about how your little one is trying to play you off against one another (I know - it hurts! But he is a clever little thing and so clearly sees both of your vulnerabilities!)
And then. Decide a strategy. It has to be something that you both agree on. i.e. what kind of behaviour will lead to 'time out' or the 'naughty step' (not hitting him, he is clearly way too smart to use that one on!!!) and what kind of behaviour WONT lead to those measures.
And also - how can you teach him to build more respect for you. this sounds silly - but look at the QUALITY of the time you are spending with him. Are you really getting onto his level and listening to him - even for just 15 mins a day? If you are distracted with the new babba, at the age of 2 he will automatically be feeling very insecure and need his mummy or daddy (or another care giver) to be constantly reassuring him that he is alway always wonderful and the centre of the universe and that you arent always trying to blag him off with a DVD or video.
Good luck - 2 yr olds can really get under your skin, bless em! lots of love too
2006-09-27 19:00:14 · answer #5 · answered by zuffin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've noticed a few things that work with my two year old.
1. get down to her level.
2. Use a deeper "stern" tone
3. make sure she (he in your case) is looking at you
4. have her repeat it.
and most important
Don't make threats make promises, in other words always do what you say you're going to do and be as consitant as possible.
My 2 1/2 year old doesn't listen all the time but when I follow those steps it works pretty well.
Good luck, stay strong.
2006-09-27 17:40:14 · answer #6 · answered by Dane_62 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
take control NOW!!! in just 11 years he will be a teen and then the REAL problems begin DO NOT try to talk to him while you are holding the baby ( which by the way he may resent you for since he now has to share you) while the baby is napping let your 2 year old know that this is you're time together also try making him you're "Helper" kids do like feeling they can be trusted with responsibility good luck
2006-09-27 17:44:25 · answer #7 · answered by frogger 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe Dad follows through with punishments and Threats. Maybe your son realizes that you are all talk and no action. Listen to yourself when you are actually talking to your son. I work in retail. I heard a woman coming closer and closer to the isle I was working, saying "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU......" she said it over and over. She finally go to my isle. There was a child in the basket, old enough to know how to behave. She got close enough to where I was standing and said her famous line again...I turned to her and said "How many times HAVE you told him?" She looked at me with a blank stare and quickly walked away. I don't think she actually realized how she sounded, until I brought it to her attention. The child had probably gotten numb to it. He knew there were no consequences.
2006-09-27 18:30:54 · answer #8 · answered by janice 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait for the child to reach 30. Other than that I favor the swat on the behind technique. Make sure that when you tell him to do something that you follow up on it. If he learns that by ignoring you he can cause you to give up the idea then he really DOESN"T have to mind you, does he:?
2006-09-27 17:46:12 · answer #9 · answered by Witchyluck 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
time outs and stick to them, 1 minute for each year old, place in quite time space (you pick) keep there until quiet and time is up then remind him what got him there. also make sure dad plays by the same rules, work together.
time outs also help you recuperate from stress.
2006-09-27 17:44:40 · answer #10 · answered by hazegrey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋