any formal committment. She goes back & forth between the exg/f and me. I felt she was at her limit 2 weeks ago as to how much more B.S. her ex could load on top of her. We had a long talk & she disclosed her deep feelings for me & stated that none of this was fair & she knew she was the one that needed to make a decision. She was ready to tell the ex to take a hike--the e gf is very malnipulative, coniving and a real button pusher. They have a child together but my friend is the mother. Obviously she has fallen for another line. After she made the statement to me last Friday that she guesses she and the ex were meant to be (the look on her face said even she didnt believe she was saying that) I walked off &left her standing there &havent called her since. She called me 2x on Sunday and then last last nite. I know my behavior has caused this to drag on in some ways. I feel its on the edge of breaking. Do you think me not making contact w/ her will make a difference?
2006-09-27 09:26:01 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There is a very deep and obvious connection between us and it would be very hard to break away from that. Our lives are very intertwined. I do get a great deal of enjoyment from the relationship.
What would you do if you truly loved someone like that?
2006-09-27 09:27:22 · update #1
In reference to the question on how they have a child.......Gay woman can indeed give birth. Sperm donars are a wonderful thing as is artificial insemination. The child knows her father and he is a intergal part of her life.
2006-09-27 09:31:29 · update #2
I would stand my ground and fight for what's mine. Don't let anyone stand in your way!!!
2006-09-27 09:30:17 · answer #1 · answered by Not Me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think two years is plenty of time for your partner to make up her mind about who she wants to be with.
Although you state that your partner's ex is "very malnipulative, coniving and a real button pusher" it doesn't sound like your girlfriend is very far behind. How awful it must be to wonder where you stand with the person you give your love to. It sounds like you love her but love isn't enough is it?
You had a two year "on-again, off-again" relationship with this person. Out of respect, you ought to tell her outright that you no longer want to have a relationship with her. If she tries to contact you afterwards, be friendly but firm: It's over. Good luck!
In reference to your additional notes, I am sure it is very difficult for you to break away from this relationship in light of all the positive things that you and your girlfriend have shared. It would puzzle me if you stayed with a person that you did not regard in a mostly favorable light. However, I still stand behind my opinion that enough is enough. Children do complicate things - no doubt that you have grown to love this child as well as your partner. If it is unbearable to part from this woman completely, perhaps you can maintain a close, friendly relationship with her and her child. After all, no one can have too many friends.
2006-09-27 16:33:57 · answer #2 · answered by happibun8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems like she cares more for the ex than u and it is obvious thatshe will keep going back and forth as long as u let it be that way...like when she calls u still talking to her...stop answering her calls and ignore her then maybe u will give her time to make a decision ...if she misses you and loves you she will be back and stay with you, but u have to put ur foot down and let her know that you dont want any headgames ..in the mean time go out and met others you never know u might find someone that wants what u want in a relationship,,,good luck
2006-09-27 16:33:34 · answer #3 · answered by liltexas36 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in a tough situation all the way around. The trouble is that you cannot control any of it. All you can do is be YOURSELF and let the chips fall where they may. If all goes well, it will be in your favor and you will be happy. If not, you must learn from this and carry on. Granted you will hurt, but it's not the end of the world, just a new chapter. Good luck to ya!! GaryT
2006-09-27 16:31:04 · answer #4 · answered by gary t 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't call her. Talk breifly with her if she calls only long enough to find out if she's made a decision. She needs a clean break with the ex in order for you to take her back.
2006-09-27 16:31:35 · answer #5 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make a difference, yes. But probably not a good, "we've reached a resolution," difference. Sometimes you need to walk completely away from the extra baggage. If she follows then yay. If not, you are better off.
2006-09-27 16:30:17 · answer #6 · answered by Muffin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her alone until she makes up her mind. She is playing you whether you want to believe it or not. She has a back bone and chooses not to use it. That's her problem not yours. Find someone else who is going to love you and only you.
2006-09-27 16:30:57 · answer #7 · answered by WENDY G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keep the conversations on the phone and simple. She has to make the decision of who she wants to be with and stick with it.
2006-09-27 16:29:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
got no clue about your relationship, but was wondering how her and her same sex ex had a child together....did they adopt?
2006-09-27 16:28:58 · answer #9 · answered by lovesyourdiamond 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your girlfriend sounds flakey. Do you want that kind of relationship?
2006-09-27 16:28:26 · answer #10 · answered by sheeny 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋