Okay, so I have been dating this guy for awhile now good kissing and sex is important to me.
Well he's not a very good kisser and not too bad in bed, and i have been trying slowly to help him out a little with the kissing and i tried to mention something one night and he looked really worried and asked me if he was good at kissing, and i didnt have the heart to say it so i just kinda said yeah and changed the subject. He is a sweet guy and I like him, but sexually an kissing he is just not picking up the hints... I try to throw out jokingly that i like it rough and being tossed around a lil bit... and he wants to know why I never "BIG O" but I dont want to crush his "man ego" or intimidate him too drastically.
I don't want to just come out and say let me teach you how to kiss, or I want you to pull my hair and talk dirty to me in bed and maybe work on some other things...
So how do you approach that conversation with a guy?
2006-09-27 08:10:38 · 12 answers · asked by BeachLvr2006 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I TOO DATED A GUY WHO COULDN'T KISS.....WHAT I DID WHEN HE STARTED TO KISS ME I SAID LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHING AND I TOOK CONTROL.....ONE THING YOU MUST HAVE IN A RELATIONSHIP IS COMMUNICATION...TELL HIM WHAT YOU LIKE WHAT YOU DON'T LIKE ETC. IF HE DOESN'T KNOW HE'LL KEEP ON DOING IT THE SAME WAY...WHEN I FIRST MET MY HUSBAND HE USED TO STICK HIS TONGUE IN MY EAR THAT'S A MAJOR NO,NO...SO I HAD TO TELL HIM THAT I DIDN'T LIKE THAT EVEN THOUGH IT MIGHT HAVE HURT HIS FEELINGS IT WAS SOMETHING THAT WAS NOT ENJOYABLE TO ME....SO JUST TRY THIS AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS..........
2006-09-27 08:21:05 · answer #1 · answered by diamond girl36 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try describing it as a fantasy you have been having. That way you don't have to "come out and say it" to him and break his heart but you do get the satisfaction of telling him what you want.
I think a "let's try it like this" approach might help out a lot as he sounds pretty insecure about his abilities.
And then if he does buy into the "fantasy" setting, you can then tell him how much you enjoyed it and incorporate it into your relationship more often.
Maybe some sort of role-play situation would be the correct fantasy to set it all up. I would try to keep in mind what he is into or what might appeal to him. Cater to what he likes and I'm pretty sure that you can have your way with him.
Kissing sounds like it would be a harder situation to deal with. Where is he lacking in that department?
2006-09-27 15:23:33 · answer #2 · answered by malkpennington 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men may seem to be bothered by suggestions but really do appreciate them. If you cant get him to follow your lead then just flat out say lets try it this way. For all you know he might be more wild then you know. I used to be hesitant until an older woman just said this is what I want.
2006-09-27 15:16:41 · answer #3 · answered by ronniep17 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If ur close enough to a guy to be sexually/physically intimate with him, u should be close enough to tell him the honest truth, cuz really ur suffering cuz of it, and so is he cuz he has no idea. Or if you wanna be nice, you can say, 'let's try this...' and you demonstrate. Then you can say 'wow...i really like kissing like this. We should kiss like this from now on' ^_^
2006-09-27 15:20:34 · answer #4 · answered by thedaybear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be like, "you know what i like?? when you kiss me like this..." and start kissing him the way you want to...and if he continues to do it wrong, be like "no..no..(playfully of course, so its not offensive) and be like, "just follow me"...and tell him when he does something right. they love that. hahaha
and in bed. you pick him up and throw him around or do to him what you want HIM to do to YOU. usually he'll follow your lead. maybe he just needs to get more into it--doing that will get him more excited. tell him he doesn't have to be so easy--that he can do whatever he wants! maybe he'll take the hint!
2006-09-27 15:17:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say..."kiss me like this"...and kiss him the way you like it.
as for sex, he needs to be more experimental with u apparently. Maybe he's shy, but should get over that.
2006-09-27 15:14:14 · answer #6 · answered by annastasia1955ca 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't talk, just show him how its done and how you like it. It can be a positive, learning experience for both of you. I'm sure he will enjoy it!
2006-09-27 15:15:20 · answer #7 · answered by ike 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you wanna swap with me, you sould like the kinda girl I like.
2006-09-27 15:15:07 · answer #8 · answered by VeeateU 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just tell him that you think he's an awesome guy and you know he wants to do everything possible to make him happy, then show him or tell him what will make you happy, I'm sure he'll be willing to please you.
2006-09-27 15:36:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good kissers are born, not made.
2006-09-27 15:21:19 · answer #10 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋