I have a sister who met up with an old boyfriend she had when she was about 18 (shes 51 now) He is promising her the world now. He is moving back here to be around her, taking on a tractor trailer job, and is promising her that he will pay off her mortgage, buy her a ranch with horses, buy her kids cars, give her all his paycheck etc etc...in exchange for staying at her house when he is home from driving the tractor trailer. Since she has been talking to him, she doesn't call me anymore or come around. Its like I just fell off the earth. The only times we talk is if I called her. Then she only talks about how she is going to have all this money...etc etc...Why doesn't she want to be bothered with me anymore?? Guess I am boring to her now?? I don't understand how someone could be like that! any advice? I'm feeling really bad about it.
2006-09-27 06:13:54 · 20 answers · asked by zoe 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I know how you feel about a sister not talking to you. I have 2 sisters who don't call. I really don't understand the reasons why they don't call. I have 2 brothers who I see and talk with all the time. The one sister lives out of state, but never calls me, I have to call her. Another sister that lives about less than 10 minutes away, only calls when she wants something. And when I called her, she was always too busy to talk. So, I quit calling both of them. I have my brothers who I have a closer relationship with than my sisters.
As old as your sister is, she won't listen to you or anyone else about this old boyfriend. He is going to use her in every way he can. He sounds like he will end up with everything she has by paying for it all. If you can talk some sense into her, urge her not to put anything in this guy's name. Nor should she have his name put on the mortgage. I have seen so many women fall for the "promise the world" thing, those men either stolen things to pawn off or abused the woman repeatedly. You may want to keep in touch with her to see how things are going. Try to protect her kids as much as you can. Be there for her when things won't work out with this guy. She doesn't realize that this guy is already planning her entire life. He is going to be very possessive of everything in her home. And in time, he may say it is all his and for her to get out.
Take care of yourself and your sister and her kids. Wish you the best of luck to get through this terrible situation.
2006-09-27 06:49:10 · answer #1 · answered by Dottie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there is many situations that could be occuring.
Is he keeping his promises to her about the things he is "going" to do? It seems as if a tractor job wont buy cars, and get her a ranch. Just from reading that, it sounds too good to be true. Maybe he just wants to stay somewhere and not pay rent and making promises and she is falling for it.
But, if its not that, she must be overwelmed by him, and too in love to not even call, or he must not like you and is trying to keep her from calling you.
I suggest you call her and meet up for lunch, and discuss what is really happening and a way for you to solve this, you are sisters, time to act like family.
2006-09-27 06:19:16 · answer #2 · answered by Jay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is caught up in her own world right now. It isn't personal, I'm sure. She loves you, but she isn't able to see past her "fantasy life" right now.
She will need you in her life. It sounds to me like this guy is feeding her a line of bull****, and chances are she will end up getting hurt. That is when you will hear from her again. Just be there for her!
You should tell her how you feel though. Let her know that you feel like she has forgotten about you. Let her know how important she is to you. You have a bond with her as her sister that can never be broken. Just hang in there and be patient. She will come back!
Good luck!!
2006-09-27 06:19:55 · answer #3 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boyfriends/husbands can often come and go, but sisters are sisters are forever. I think she needs to be reminded of this. And the sooner the better. You don't have to be mean about it, but you don't have to accept her ignoring you, either. If she doesn't call you, you call her. If she doesn't pay you a visit, then you pay her one. Call and invite her places.....lunch, a movie, whatever. She may think she has a "good thing going" with this ex, and she very well may. It could just as easily turn out that he is just a big flake. But blood is thicker than water.
2006-09-27 06:24:30 · answer #4 · answered by kj 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is her lose. She has not forgotten about you, just has something else to think about right now. When things calm down for her again, she will be back to calling you. Don't you remember doing the same thing when you first meet a guy. That is all you can think about is him, that is the only person you want to talk to, etc. Give her some time and she will come back to calling you. Be their for her when this guy is not what he says.
2006-09-27 06:21:46 · answer #5 · answered by dr's mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow those were some rude suggestions. I suggest you ask to meet up with her and give her a heart to heart. Tell her how you feel. It sounds like she may have the wool pulled over her eyes. Typically people who cut out relationships may be being abused, mistreated, or taken advantage of. I can't really say since I don't know you or your sister. Meet her somewhere neutral and really talk about whats going on. Plan out what you want to say to her and tell her you feel ignored. Communication is key. I hope your relationship works out! Good luck!
2006-09-27 06:18:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were you i'd stop calling for even as provide it per week per chance and word if he even bothers to call you lower back interior of that week. If he would not do not call him and if he does that likely nonetheless is fascinated in chit chatting with you. adult men are complicated and hard to describe often times in case you provide them a touch area they omit what they have had. mean even as save your self busy and definitely do not stay round waiting for him to call. if he calls ,he calls, if he would not it wont be the right of the global and also you wont be curious anymore as to him wanting you to call or no longer after that, the answer will be clean to you.
2016-12-02 04:33:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her sit there and live in her fantasy land for now. When the guy does not live up to all those expectations, she will come crawling back. But thats what friends/sisters are for, including taking each other back when we have been stupid and made mistakes.
2006-09-27 06:21:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you have 2 choices. You could call her and have a long talk with her and tell her how you feel or you could just stop calling and after awhile she MIGHT realize what she is missing and then IF she does, you could explain to her why you haven't called or whatever. Maybe she is just so happy she is forgetting what is most important.
2006-09-27 06:19:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people talk the talk, lets see if this guy walks the walk.
I would give it 6 months and she will start phoning you again , crying for forgiveness. Hang in there, she's family after all.
2006-09-27 06:19:41 · answer #10 · answered by bear4u 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋