Just curious how to handle it. Some children are new friends from school and I wouldn't expect them to bring a gift at all.
2006-09-27 03:21:24 · 20 answers · asked by Molly 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Problem is there was a set of invitations already given out where nothing was said. Should it just be up to that kid's parents to make the decision?
2006-09-27 03:25:19 · update #1
It is NEVER ok to put "No Gifts" on ANY invitation, because it is presumptuous.
If someone directly asks about gifts, then you can respond saying that you're really not interested in gifts, you really just want to see them there...
2006-09-28 07:08:38 · answer #1 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone feels obligated to take a gift. Some of the "new" people as you put it may be insulted that you think they don't have money. Just as some of the "old people" may be in a pickle because they don't. My biggest problem has been getting invites in between paydays. In the future get to know the people you want to invite. Have a cut off date, on which the guest list must be done. Also have the invites sent/given in enough time to find a gift. Give the invites to the parents,NOT the kids. It's very impersonal, and the invites can get lost. This way of you know someone does not have the funds for a gift, you can approch them in a less embarssing way. For example" Susy, I really want you to bring Jimmy to the party. Jason and Jimmy are such good friends, and that is enough of a gift. The party won't be the same with out all of you there."
2006-09-27 03:43:34 · answer #2 · answered by HH6 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Overall, I don't think it's rude to request "no gifts" on an invitation, but that doesn't seem to be the real question here.
As there have already been previous invitations sent, without a request that there be "no gifts," it may seem to those who received earlier invitations that they are expected to bring gifts while others aren't. Also, if it means that many may be arriving at the party with gifts, those who do not bring a gift may be embarassed by having not brought a gift.
Additionally, it could be confusing to your child why some people bring gifts to the party and others don't.
For future parties, there would be nothing rude about requesting "no gifts." However, if invitations have already been sent for this particular party without that request, making that change now would definitely be impolite.
2006-09-27 05:06:55 · answer #3 · answered by JenV 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you sent out invitations already you should not change the format or information on the second set of invitations. Everyone should be invited in the same way with all the same information. Just use this as a learning experience for your next party!
2006-09-27 03:54:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
In our culture, it is customary to bring a gift of sorts to a birthday party. As adults, when we say, "No gifts," we are seen as being modest, and people bring them anyway; indeed, some will still expect gifts even after saying "No gifts." Therfore, some will see the "No gifts" on the invitation as modesty, and your plan may backfire, with one or two kids bringing a gift anyway, which will cause feelings of alienation. I would say the best thing to do is to simply not worry about it. Leave the invitations as is, and let people decide for themselves to do what is customary for them.
2006-09-27 03:51:07 · answer #5 · answered by digitalquirk 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
When a kid goes to a birthday party they should know it is polite to bring a gift. Don't deny them the learning experience to enrich their social behavior. Their parents will send them with a gift, even if you say that. It's just what's proper.
2006-09-27 03:25:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
It's not impolite, but no one would listen anyway. Who wants to go to a kid's party without a gift? People will spend a small amount if they can't spend a lot. Don't worry.
2006-09-27 03:29:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Saying "no gifts " for an adult or even a teenager is fine, but younger kids LOVE birthday parties and presents! It makes them feel extra special. Why deny them this?
2006-09-27 04:10:53 · answer #8 · answered by zigsmom95 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Often, parents will ask when they rsvp, esp if it is a new friend. In the future, consider saying, "My child is interested in..." and naming a few things.
However, to answer your actual question, I think it is just fine. Many parents would probably be relieved not to have to worry about it. Just make sure your child understands what is going on.
2006-09-27 03:59:18 · answer #9 · answered by Jensenfan 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes it is and then it might be a relief to some parents that really would not know what to get your child. just put on the invitation no gifts please just come and enjoy the party or something to that effect.
2006-09-27 03:24:51 · answer #10 · answered by snoopdizzal 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋