And whats with the big booty lesbians?I have been going with him for almost 4 yrs. Should I take it personalt or just get over it? I have found it in his DVD player and on his computer. It makes me feel unattractive and lowers my self esteem. We only see each other on weekends so is that why he does it during the week? But I can tell when he has been watching it alot cause he will come over that weekend and not touch me! That really bothers me I feel he should want me cause its been all week but he already pleases hiself and it leaves me to fend for myself. I have talked to him about it but he always brushes it off. It does make me feel uncomfortable. Is it normal to feel this way or am I just being unconfident in myself?
2006-09-27 02:58:54 · 22 answers · asked by domonique3333 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Okay First off Men watch porn ...It has nothing to do with how they feel about you or they wish they had something better.....Men physically need to release/relieve themselves sexualy more than women (most women) there is nothing emotional behind it....look at it like this.....
men think very basically...for example..."I am hungry therefore I will eat" or "I need compainship I will call a friend" THAT'S IT!!!! now take that same situation and put a woman in it (most women) and you get five minutes of figuring out what we are craving...am I gonna gain weight ...is it gonna make me break out????? Damn it I wish I was thin like Anne she can eat anything that wench!!!! Hmm I'm kinda lonely should I give Jess a buzz ...oh no wait she pissed me off in Chem class last week.....
Do you see...We are by nature different. they (men) don't think too deeply or how it will effect others....If I were you I would not take it personal or think that he is comparing you to them (girls in the porn)....besides have you ever actually watched a porn film, they are some nasty looking women who look like three miles of BAD ROAD....even the plastic airbrushed ones....I would drop the whole porn thing....BUT I would address him not being there for you on the week-ends be honest about that ....tell him your concerns and that you don't feel your needs are being met...Maybe he genuinely does not realize he is doing anything wrong ....or that you want more than what he is giving you....Remember Men can not read our minds sometimes we need to come out and tell them what we want.....not think they will pick up our signals.....that is just setting them up for a big fall!!! and let's face it that really isn't fair.....GOOD LUCK
2006-09-27 03:24:45 · answer #1 · answered by Erin O. 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
2
2016-07-19 14:53:24 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it's normal
2014-06-07 00:32:34 · answer #3 · answered by Sara 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your man has a problem. You should be glad that he is watching porn and pleasing himself instead of having someone else do it.
I can not understand why he wouldn't touch when he watches it.
I think that when he doesn't touch you, that is when he didn't watch it. Maybe he just needs a little help getting turned on. Some people prefer to watch porn and that is ok.
Watch it with him and see what happens.
Don't let it bother your self esteem. If you realise that he is watching the porn to get turned on then you can find out ways to do it yourself so that you wouldn't feel the way you do.
2006-09-27 03:07:35 · answer #4 · answered by Osunwole Adeoyin 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, it is normal for you to feel that way. Unfortunately, it's also very normal for guys to watch porn. So to some extent this is a classic guy-girl argument.
The not normal part of the problem here is that he's pleasing himself and not being considerate of your feelings. He should not "brush you off" when you're talking about something that bothers you and about how he isn't satifying your desires in the relationship. I think you should get him to talk with you about this. Explain how important it is. If he's not willing to make some changes you might want to thing about moving on. The way I deal with the porn thing is this - he can watch or look all he wants, but *I* don't want to see it. So the DVD or whatever needs to be put away when I come over. (Porn doesn't make me feel inferior but I don't like to see it.) And if he wasn't satisfying me... well, that's just lame.
2006-09-27 03:06:06 · answer #5 · answered by pamgissa 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
First off, if the problem is just that he likes watching porn, then no you should not be offended, or feel like there is something wrong with you. Try watching with him or show him that you are interested in having your own fun with him. I know it sounds way out there but if your relationship is solid and you trust him then he'll appreciate you even more for making the effort for him. HOWEVER, it is a much more serious problem if he prefers watching to being with you!!! You need to sit and discuss with him openly and honestly. If you care and respect about eachother you need to work it out . Every relationship is a give and take process and even your physical relationship is like that. You both need to try things out for eachother and respect eachother in the things you prefer to do and not do. Talk to eachother about everything. And enjoy eachother...with all you quirks, preferences, and tastes. If you can't then you are not meant to be together.
2006-09-27 03:12:19 · answer #6 · answered by G S 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have the same prob. My fiance has a few questionable DVDs. I took like he liked the women on them better than me. So I confronted him on it and talked it over. He said the only reason he watched them was for fantasy sake. He says it's hard to achieve orgasms on his own with out visualizations. So the next time I went over there, I checked out where he shut it off and what he was watching up until that point. It turned out that the parts that he got off to were just the genitalia, no faces, no full body, nothing that I was thinking. Now I go and buy him porn, with that type of content. He says it turns him on even more because I've picked it out. Good luck and don't take it personally.
2006-09-27 03:09:12 · answer #7 · answered by barbara_taylor17 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
To be blunt, I think you deserve better. I mean, if he's going to do that kind of thing, he can at least be discreet about it. However, it sounds like he is really hung up on that stuff like it's a very important part of his life, instead of an occasional diversion.
It's not a good sign for the future of your relationship. Go out a find a better man who is healthier, and you will feel better about yourself.
Oh, and "Big Booty Lesbians" . . . sheesh. Sounds like he has some issues. Is that supposed to be sexy or something?
2006-09-27 03:04:26 · answer #8 · answered by mike_answ 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
All men look at porn..lol...my man got hundreds of pornos. It shouldnt make your man love you any less. Unless of course hes a porn addict then you maybe should be worried. Men are just very visual. Dont matter if you live with your man or not..like i do....They still look at porn and still please themselves as much as they can. Dont worry about it hon. If you really feel hes not giving you any attention on the weekends maybe its for some other reason than porn. Maybe you should find another man if this bothers you so much.
2006-09-27 03:04:39 · answer #9 · answered by michelle 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First of all, NO your not being unconfident. There are a lot of good looking women, including yours truly, that do not agree with porn. I dumped my fiance for watching that sh*t. What you need to do is order some PlayGirl or anything with naked hunks, just make sure they are not gay, and have them laying around in the house. See how his reaction is. He might act like its no big deal at first but it will bother him. There are going to be plenty of answers that are going to say 'get over it and get some confidence'. Dont listen to them. Those are the one's who dont care what their man does., they're just happy to have one! Talk to him about it and tell him it bothers you. If he has respect for you, he will get rid of it. If not, then you deserve someone that is going to make you feel like your the best thing ever. Good luck!!
2006-09-27 03:05:56 · answer #10 · answered by Ash 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋