I have 2 step daughters that drive me crazy .I have tried to be a good step father but it dosnt make a differents what i say or do they do a 360 on me. help what should i do ?
2006-09-26 15:20:47 · 18 answers · asked by Angel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Maybe they are testing you to see if you really love them , the best choice to found out is to take them out in at least one day trip somewhere in the mountains with plenty fresh air and magnificent view,there away of the usual tense-days they would can see you are also an human being not only an authoritarian parent , a person who can smile and laugh,who don't get mad if someone makes a joke about him , a person who loves to live in peace and harmony such all the natural elements around all of us , they will see as one of them who are not there for punishment or restraining but for take care of them till they will take care by themselves.
2006-09-26 15:44:31 · answer #1 · answered by Paul Alexandru Cazacliu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your children have experienced too much instability. They have had their needs sacrificed for the wants of both parents. They have learned that there is no reason to respect their parents because their parents have never respected them.
You both need to become a mother and a father. Focus for awhile on doing what parents do for children. Help them with homework, drive them to the football game, keep a roof over their heads and food in the house.
Make sure they get shoes and clothing when they outgrow the other things. Take the kids to the movies, or rent a family movie and pop popcorn. Your children depend on you for nothing. They only survive. Any way they can. They are going to cope in the only way they know how....by taking to the streets. It's time for your family to move. Look for subsidized housing and have a job in place that you can start as soon as you arrive. Plan the date and run. Start over. Give the kids a second chance. Be the parent you wish you had had.
2006-09-26 22:41:53 · answer #2 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about it in their situation. They're mother is now with another man, not with their by blood father. It will just take some time. And make sure you don't try to suck up to them or act all strict, just act cool, just act like yourself around them. And they'll soon begin to accept the fact that they have a new father in their life
2006-09-26 22:25:27 · answer #3 · answered by exxohh<3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, your wife needs to know how you feel and the two of you need to come to an agreement on how to raise and handle the kids. Don't let her say "Do what you thinks is best" cause how would you know where to start. These kids have been w/ her for their whole life and they haven't been in yours for all that long (assuming might it be). Good luck, and don't let them rule your world. And if you have to be the bad guy, I have sympathy with you.
2006-09-26 22:35:14 · answer #4 · answered by clover_t21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They feel like you are trying to take the place of their father. Be sure that you don't tell them things like,"i am not trying to take the place of your father" because that will make them feel aucward. Take them places, have family game nights, have fun and don't push the FATHER thing. You could always tell them that you just want to be palls. they will like that alot. well good luck with your step daughters!
2006-09-26 22:25:36 · answer #5 · answered by megmotox 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you a step father or stepmom? coz your avater shows you're a woman. well anyways, i think your step kids dont like you at all. what you can do is discuss this with their real parent and maybe he/she can do something. dont get tired of being good to them coz someday you'll earn what you have sown.
goodluck to you
2006-09-26 22:24:31 · answer #6 · answered by snoopy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had a step dad that i hated. not b/c he did anything 2 me but b/c i wanted my mom and my dad together. what worked for us was he didnt treat me like his kid. he let all discipline to my mother. he treated me w/ respect and i did the same to him. we compromised on any issues. it's a relationship u have to build. just doesnt happen. never yell at them or try to punish them. talk it out with what they did and choose what mommy must know to punish and what can be "slipped" on by.
2006-09-26 22:35:30 · answer #7 · answered by clueless_idiot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk with their mother and set some ground rules that you and she mutually agree on and follow through. There should be consequences based on their ages if they don't want to follow the rules.
2006-09-26 22:25:51 · answer #8 · answered by Laura Renee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe there just having some trouble adjusting.Try talking to them about how they feel about you an their mothers relationship. They probably are trying to tell there mother that they aren't comfortable with change.
2006-09-26 22:28:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TALK TO YOUR WIFE ABOUT THEM ..AND HAVE A MEETING WITH THEM AND YOUR WIFE ...KIDS NOW A DAYS WONT LISTEN UNLESS MOM STEPS IN AND SETS RULES..JUST DONT DO ANYTHING FOR THEM LIKE GIVE THEM MONEY AND STUFF UNTIL THEY RESPECT YOU...FAIR IS FAIR
2006-09-26 22:23:28 · answer #10 · answered by liltexas36 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋