We have been dating for 4 years, and I recently realized that I have never really had romantic feelings for him. I have been too practical. There are nice reasons for us to be together, for example, we are both musicians, we share a similar sense of humor which can make things really fun, etc. But I have never had those feelings that people get with their partner like butterflys in my stomach, or my heart skipping a beat. And my mom recently said to me, "you know, I know that I am still in love with your dad because everytime he comes in the room, my heart skips a beat." And I heard another woman I know who has been married for 30 years say the same thing!!! And my heart has NEVER skipped a beat for him. Up until my heart DID skip a beat for a really great guy I met recently, and until my mom said that, I didnt know that that kind of relationship could be possible. Now I do, but I dont really want to leave a nice guy just because of something stupid like petty romance. Or is it petty??
2006-09-26 14:46:57 · 17 answers · asked by Sam S 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it sounds like you need to take a break from him... Then after some time away see if your heart skips a beat the next time you meet. If not, it never will and you need to terminate the relationship for good. I have a huge crush on a girl at work and my heart pounds like crazy everytime we are in the same room together. And yes I have had my heart crushed like you couldn't imagine so if you break this dudes heart don't feel bad because I am proof that he will be able to have warm feelings for a woman again some day.
2006-09-26 14:54:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lessen the meetings with your boyfriend or maybe you might want to take a break. Sometime we take things for granted. When I was in a long term relationship like 8 years, I felt the same way too. And when we met after months, I felt that my heart skipped a beat for him but ... I'm already in a new relationship with someone I adore.
If I had not given the new relationship a chance, I think the part will do us good. I do not regret being in another new relationship however for your case, I'd think its better to not move into another .. at least you'll have a chance to decide whether you still want want him or its time to move on.
Being together for long, there's definitely something between the two. Ironically, we'll probably only figure out when we are apart.
2006-09-26 22:11:09 · answer #2 · answered by Laetishaa 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to ask yourself what your reaction would be if he wasnt to come home one day, or if he sat you down and said that he thought the relationship was going no where and wanted to end it. How you would feel to that question should tell you if you should be with this person or not. I have been married for 25 years (was married young) and I still cannot go the day without at least 3 telephone conversations with my hubby. They keep me going till he gets home. Yes at times he is annoying and I think I may want to choke him, but if he never came home, my life would be over. If you dont feel that way, maybe you do need to re think your relationship, but only you can make that decision. IT is what is in your heart that will tell you.
2006-09-26 22:11:42 · answer #3 · answered by auburn 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Romance does not come to you. You have to build it yourself. Write a love note to him and encourage him to do the same. Um, or you could just drop hints that women like roses or something. I heard a story from Stephen Covey once[1] that said the feelings could come from performing the "action" of loving.
Why not add, in fact, that, at least the way I see it, practical is better than empty (I think) romances. Just a thought.
2006-09-26 22:04:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
why are you out meeting other guys ? you kow after 4 years you cant just leave your b/f i mean u can but your gonna miss him dearly...and he might find someone else that really loves him and then you will lose out....find out what it means when a heart skips a beat... and dont go on misleading your b/f ..tell him how you feel so he can go on with his life and find another while you go with ur skip a beat guy u met....tell your b/f to email me i will talk to him and be his friend
2006-09-26 21:51:50 · answer #5 · answered by liltexas36 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that feeling lasted always, with everyone, do you realy believe that the divorce rate would be what it is? The feeling changes as we change. Sometines you get lucky and it lasts forever, but most of the time it doesn't. Do what you feel is best for you, but be aware of the facts. I don't many people that live happily ever after. Go with what feels right, but remember that those feelings may change one day and if they do what are you left with.
2006-09-26 21:52:59 · answer #6 · answered by sleepingbeauty123 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...4 years are a lot of years put into a relationship...practically, is it worth giving it up?...does he gie you all the loving that you want?...well if it were me...i probably wouldnt leave the person until i find someone else...but if you cant decide you could always flip a coin...good luck
2006-09-26 21:56:34 · answer #7 · answered by narfanator 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u have no romatic fealings 4 the guy than why date him when there are other fish oi the sea who r will 2 devote them selves 4 u AND you will actually like the person.
2006-09-26 21:50:25 · answer #8 · answered by Strawberry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, love can be selfish, and this is now. Whether you should stay with him depends on what you want. Do you want someone to share your interests with or someone to love you and love you only, and in this case, you don't really know whether that guy loves you back.
2006-09-26 21:53:01 · answer #9 · answered by melomane 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, i think u should just be friends, because that is the way ur relationship sounds to me. it sounds like ur really good friends, but not like a b/f, g/f kind of relationship.
2006-09-26 21:50:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋