Is 20 years too much of an age difference?

Question

I want to have another child but women my own age (46) aren't really up for it. Younger British women don't seem to be interested in men over 40 (judging from the upper age limit they put on thier internet personal ads) so I'm looking eastwards to the thousands of young Russians who want to marry a European man. So, is 20 years too much of an age difference to be realistic? What about 10yrs?

Answer 1

Ten years is a good age limit to work with. Any younger and you'll have to be changing diapers and babysitting. They may be younger and cutter but they require constant attention. It could be draining and destroy the relationship you work so hard to build. Theres plenty of older single attractive women who would be glad to meet you on an even intellectual level that will be so pleasing, you'll wonder why you wanted to be with someone so much younger than you in the first place

Answer 2

That is one of the beauties of being a guy, you can be pretty much any age to start a family. Now is it recommended well that depends on you. Basically if you are a nice guy and have a high paying job, you can find some 20 something year old to hook up with. Culturally speaking an american girl would suit you the best. A 30 something year old might be even be better.
BEWARE OF RUSSIAN WOMEN THAT YOU MAY FIND ON THE INTERNET! Most of them are scams and probably aren't even women. My suggestion would use a service someone else you know used. Mail order bride do work but most are really just after you citizenship.

Answer 3

Ideally, you should be looking for a woman who will make a good mother AND wife, and not just someone young and fertile enough to pop out babies on command. If you get a mail-order bride just to have a child, that kid is going to be very unhappy knowing his parents entered a marriage of convenience. That's not fair to anyone.
20 years is a considerable age difference - you are both at very different stages in your life. Age matters less the older you get, so 10 years might be a more healthy and workable difference.

Some ideas:
-focus on the kids you already have
-marry a woman near your own age that already has a kid.
-find a woman about 10 years younger who is eager to have a child
-adopt or foster a child

fyi, those "thousands of young Russians" don't want to marry a European man - they want a visa to get out of their poverty. Are you really comfortable with this sort of prostitution?

Answer 4

It's only too much for women that have no interest in a man your age. But fortunately, there are lots of women 10-15-20 yrs younger that would love to raise a family and who better than aman that wants a family and is financially secure.

I was engaged to a girl 28. She had a 9yr old daughter and wanted more children... She fell in love with me. I'm nearly 50. I was more than ready to be a dad again.... I was actually hoping to be a dad again... but she was just the wrong person for me... I didn't feel about her as she felt about me.... for me it didn't work out but at least you know there are women out there that won't give the age difference a second thought...

Go find that girl...she's out there.... but remember so many girls don't really know what they are looking for... so they waste time on guys with no future... by the time they find out they are 40 yrs old and have 5 kids and the hubby is filing for divorce so he can run off with some little tart he met... But there are girls out there that know exactly what they want...and it might just be you!!!

Answer 5

Do you want to have a child with someone you have 'bought'? What if you split (which you will if you are not in love) and she wants to return to Russia with the kids? Messy.

I think you should keep looking through personal ads. I don't like older men myself but I believe most women in their late 20's would happily consider a man in his 40's. And anyway, a woman your age can still have kids! Good luck.

Answer 6

the problem is, you are looking for a woman just to carry your child, British women don't want to be pigeonholed. I am 35 and I would be attracted to a man of your age if he was well preserved, not necessarily good lookin but with older men your lookin for them to adore you and treat you special and not just use you to procreate! This is a question of what you really want out of a relationship and what you are prepared to give.

It seems like your biological clock is ticking and You don't wanna get older! I actually really feel for you because men sometimes prioritise their jobs before their families and we give pity to the women who do this and forget that men sometimes have a nurturing and caring side. My advice is ignore the personals and find a woman who you really want to be with in your real life!

Answer 7

If all you want is reproduction...then it is OK to marry a younger woman regardless of her intellectual and emotional maturity. A young woman is likely to be a healthier mother, than a middle age woman. Now you want another child or a mature conversation partner?
If it's a child what you want...marry a young woman...if it is a good conversation, then forget about the child.
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Answer 8

jesus, please DONT look abroad, all they want is to get into our country, they will say and do anything! we have enough immigrants here already. why is it so important to have another child?
u should just concentrate on yourself and finding someone u love and who loves u. women are not baby machines!
i suggest u go get some therapy to find out why u are so desperate.
20 years difference is way too much, when shes 50, u will be an old guy of 70!
u dont seek someone for a baby, u seek someone for love!

Answer 9

20 years is to much of an age gap. 10 years is more realistic, think of the child - when the child is 20 you will be 66!! think of the burden as well..

Answer 10

i'm 29 and my partner is 46 so 17 years difference. Age is only a number its how you feel when you are together that counts