We broke up for a stupid reason (something insignificant in the whole scheme of life but he is too stupid and can't get past it). I would still be with him - however this is his decision (and he knows this). We have always had a lot of fun together - that never changed. We attempted to stay friends b/c we have to see each other at work. But I ended up cutting things off completely (outside for when I have to talk to him b/c of work) b/c he is not letting me move on. Meaning I actually said "I am done with everything." Everytime I became distant and/or un-friendly, he would confront me or start drama to get him back into my head. We broke up almost 4 months ago (and only dated for 3) and he is still doing this. I am so fed up with this and have just gone into non-responsive mode with him - but since I have to see him there is nothing I can do if he corners me. Does anyone have advice as to how I can deal with this differently that will make him FINALLY let me move on with my life?
2006-09-26 10:38:28 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It is not my boss. And my company is not big enough that there is a place for me to move to where I won't have to see/work with the ex.
2006-09-26 10:43:34 · update #1
I won't tell you to look for another job because that doesn't make any sense...you probably like your job. I am in the same situation as you, but he is the one that ended things because he decided to work things out with his live-in girlfriend. But yet he wants to stay friends with me and act as if nothing happened (like hurting me). He expects me to be friendly and smile at him when I just want to smack him. I have to see him every day and it is hard. I don't know how to act around him. He wants to be with her, yet he wants me still around and still flirts and says he has feelings.
We should both just end it and find ways to avoid him. Make new lunch friends. Avoid his e-mails. Walk a different route around the office. Send flowers to yourself. Tell him it's over for good, you had your chance, and you blew it. Tell him he's the one you let get away and tell him to learn from it for the next time. Move on and forget him. Once this happens, he will feels the vibes and get the hint. Now I just have to do the same for myself.
2006-09-26 10:46:29 · answer #1 · answered by Xerxes32 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's tough! I wish I could have a right answer for you but I can just tell you what I would do. I would ignore him and it sounds like that is what you are trying to do. Tell him again...guys don't usually understand it the first few times. Tell him that it is hurting your friendship and that you will never be with him again and you just want him to leave you alone.
It sounds like you have tried that already. Just let him know AGAIN...seeing how some guys just DON'T GET IT...and if that doesn't work try a new job. I know that you shouldn't have to change that much because of him, but if he is bothering you that much then that seems like the only idea. Good luck...Hopefully I was some help to you : )
2006-09-26 10:49:59 · answer #2 · answered by Jess07~* 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move to another part of the Company and fast. Working together isn't going to rid this guy....Good Luck. Break up is just that Break up, if he can't figure this out better that you rid yourself from him. Good Luck
2006-09-26 10:42:16 · answer #3 · answered by Dimples 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Report to your boss what is going on. Have your boss mediate and hold a meeting between you and your ex to resolve your issues. If he does not abide by your resolutions, file a complaint against him. Good luck.
2006-09-26 10:46:11 · answer #4 · answered by sam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore him. Don't feed into what he says. Don't feed into the drama. Thats his way of holding on. There is no need to be extra friendly or go out of your way to make sure he is comfortable. Just be civil. You can do it. One day it won't even other you anymore.
2006-09-26 10:42:36 · answer #5 · answered by britt333 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That;s why you don't bang people at work - it gets too complicated.
He needs to leave you alone if he values his job, because you can blow the whistle on him if you have clearly told him that you are no longer interested in him.
2006-09-26 10:42:27 · answer #6 · answered by drsteve362005 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He shouldn't be discussing this on company time. Report him.
2006-09-26 10:42:55 · answer #7 · answered by dances_away_from_you 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your boss he is sexually harrassing you.
2006-09-26 10:40:27 · answer #8 · answered by shepardman1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋