My boyfriend and I have lived together for 17 months now, I have a 15 yr old son in Freshman Football at his school. Tonight they are having a spagetti dinner fund raiser. Of course I planned for us to go. I just picked my b/f up from work and he got into the car and said "well we won't be having any fun tonight" and I said "why, you don't want to go to the dinner?" and he said "yeah it sucks"....I am PISSED OFF!! Aren't we supposed to be a family....he's known for a week and a half about going to this....am I wrong to think that he should be positive and supportive of me and my son and go and actually act like a family?? He talks about marrying me ect....well....doesn't that mean being willing to do these kinds of things...I don't mind he doesn't really like to go but atleast be positive about it and try to have fun. Am I wrong?
2006-09-26 09:44:16 · 7 answers · asked by Shae 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
also he said that he never said he wouldn't go....he is going to go....but why complain?
2006-09-26 09:45:25 · update #1
No, you are not wrong. I think he should have at least let you know earlier his feelings about attending the dinner instead of waiting until the last minute and he could have stated it in a more pleasant way. It seems now you are probably going to feel as though you are "walking on eggs" while you are at the dinner. But, you never know, he just might enjoy it more than he is thinking right now. That way you can relax and all of you have a decent time.
2006-09-26 10:00:25 · answer #1 · answered by Oenophile... (Lynn) 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, your not wrong. It sounds to me like maybe he isn't fully invested in this relationship the way he should be. A man who gets involved with a woman who has kids needs to realize that his life is going to change and that he is part of a family. I have to wonder if he can really keep being a part of this family and give you and your kids what they deserve. I don't blame him for not liking those things but come on we all go to these things and survive without complaining all the time. How many things do you and your kids do just because he wants to?
2006-09-26 16:50:12 · answer #2 · answered by rkrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is awful. Is he trying to ruin the evening for you and your son? You are not wrong to be upset. That is being part of a family. If he chose not to go that wouldn't be quite so bad (even though I think he should go) but to gripe and ruin your time is inexcusable.
2006-09-26 17:02:55 · answer #3 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's just in a sour mood. Yes, he should be supportive and he has known about this for some time. But if he has been supportive and this has been the only negative thing he has done, cut him some slack.
2006-09-26 16:47:22 · answer #4 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not a family, you tried to assemble one with a guy but he's just the boyfriend. A family includes a guy that considers himself a parent, which your boyfriend apparently does not.
2006-09-26 16:48:09 · answer #5 · answered by live2ride 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that was wrong of him. He should know that your kids come first and then him. If he doesn't like it, tell him that that's the way it is. The kids come with the package like it or not. If he can't deal with it you should move on and find somebody who is.
2006-09-26 16:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by Jad 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a husband is a "family member"
a son is a "family member"
a boy friend is NOT. so don't let this bf of yours come between your family!
2006-09-26 16:48:38 · answer #7 · answered by 1confused1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋