How can I get my 2 1/2 yr old to go to bed with out it being a 2 hour project.?

Question

At nite my daughter gives me and my husband so many problems. She has an excuse for everything. She wants a bottle, shes hungry, she wants to read a book, she wants the light on, she needs a diaper change, and on and on and on. It takes us almost everynite at least 2-2.5 hours to put her to bed. I dont like to spank her but. And I hate to hear her cry, especially if she says shes hungry.. I give in every time-because id never want her to go to bed hungry. She always has a snack before bed, I just still feel bad. My daughter is very smart, and my finance says that shes got me rapped around her finger. How far do I go? How long should this process be? She just moved from her crib to a toddler bed about 1mo ago. Am I too nice? Is that possible? HELP ME?????!!!!!!!!

Answer 1

As long as you give in she will always push you into giving in more. This is normal behavior for children. It is there job to push the boundaries and it is our job as parents to gently enforce the boundaries.

She shouldn't be hungry if she ate dinner. Eating before bed time is a bad habit to start and can lead to weight issues at any age.

Children will use any excuse to procrastinate going to bed. They think they are going to miss out on something when they are asleep. Make sure you keep the noise level down in the house once she lays down. If she hears things happening she will want o know what it is.

If she likes having a story read to her then make time for this before you lay her down.

Children work better with schedules. Schedules let them know what is expected of them.

We had a similar problem with my first born. We used a wind up alarm clock to signal to him that it was time for bed. It really worked. We put the clock on the TV in the main room so he can see it and he knew that when it went off it was time to go to bed.

Set a schedule that works and start early enough to make sure her needs are met in time to get her to bed at the time you want her in bed.

Good Luck!

Answer 2

Sometimes children need to wind down a little. Make sure you do not give them any caffeine close to bedtime. Even juice that is high in sugar can make it more difficult for them to go to bed. Obviously, your child is used to this "2 hour project," and now is a great time to break the habit. Try reading a story to your daughter or putting on some music. Explain to her that it is bedtime and she needs to get her rest. Give her an ultimatum. Maybe if she goes to bed on time every night for a week, you'll take her to the park. Try winding down with her so she doesn't feel like she doesn't want to sleep. Before bed, give her a little snack and a drink, change her diaper, and do all the thing like a half an hour before bed so there are no more excuses. It will work out. Try putting her on a strict bedtime schedule and things will get better. Children like having a routine to stick by, so they know whats next. If you decide to have more kids, try putting them on a schedule early on in life. Good luck to you.

Answer 3

Right now your 2 year old is just testing the waters and seeing just how far she can get with mom and dad. Unfortunately your fiance is right about you being wrapped around her finger (trust me I have 4 kids and have had this experience), but you must show her your mom and this is how it has to be and it can be fun too. Make a chart using a poster board and buy some stickers for her to put on it when she goes to bed like a good girl. It's important to make sure you let her know it's almost time for bed and this is the time to have a snack because we all know eating right before bedtime is NOT ok for our bodies. Make it a game read to her in her bed and offer to lie down with her for a short time. Reading to her in her bed is definitely the better plan. Also you may want to spend a little more time in her room playing games that she can play. You may want to offer to let her pick out something she would like in her room - we let our daughter choose new bedding and if you can do this she may want to stay in there more often. I hope this helps out. Good Luck!!

Answer 4

You need to be consistant about bedtime. You daughter isn't going to go hungry if you have fed her a meal before she goes to be. Set a routine and stick with it. If the gets out of bed take her by the hand and put her back in bed and tell her the first time you do this its time for bed. The next time she gets out of bed do the same thing. The third time and there after when she gets out of bed just take her to her bed and don't say anything. Keep doing this until she goes to sleep.

Answer 5

Just quit giving into her. Just know that anything she says after she hears the words "time for bed" is an excuse. Every little thing she gets you to do is another minute she gets to stay awake. Just give her a bath, put her pajamas on, lay her down, hugs and kisses, and turn the light off. If she gets out of bed just put her right back in it. She's walking all over you and it's only gonna get worse if you don't stop it now.

Answer 6

Ok, everyone else has already touted the routine factor. Now the approach for the demanding manipulative child.

My daughter is also 2 1/2 as of last week. Also got a toddler bed last month. She kept wanting to sleep with us. We would have to let her fall asleep with us then move her to her bed. She would wake up and come back to ours, and so on...

No more! 2 weeks ago pediatricial suggested the following;
Did they usual routine..
Snack, brush teeth, story

Then put her in her bed, gave her a hug, told her I loved her very much and would be there when the sun came up. Then put up a baby gate in the open doorway and let her scream for 15 minutes.
Went in, gave her another hug, tucked her in. 10 more minutes of screaming.
Went in again, gave her another hug, 5 minutes of fussing and she was asleep.
It has gotten easier and the screaming has lessened in the last 2 weeks. She is now either fussing/playing quietly until she falls asleep or screaming for 10 minutes then passing out.

Good luck!

Answer 7

chill mum, chill.

All your daughter is doing is pushing to see how far she will go.
Don't give her too much, NEVER put the light on, always change her and then do the following.

1) when she first gets out, bring her back to bed and give her a kiss and a cuddle and say "good night".
2) when she gets out again, bring her back to bed, say nothing, just tuck her in.
3) keep on repeating number 2.

You have to do this and unfortunately after a week or so, the message gets in.
I know it sounds horrible and tiresome but it seriously works. Now my daughter is 3 and we still get the odd time but nothing like it used to be.

Also, it may be worth introducing a small walk before bed, after dinner. The fresh air sometimes makes them more tired.

Good Luck!

Answer 8

Start sticking to a routine, and invest in a night-light for her room.

An hour before bed, give her the snack. Then a bath and into pajamas. Brush teeth. Let her choose a book, check/change diaper, read her the book, tuck her into bed.

Do this EVERY night.

Also, read the "No Cry Sleep Solution" - you can find it at almost any bookstore.

Answer 9

I don't want to be mean, but yes you are being too nice if it takes over two hours to get your toddler to sleep at night. When my son and I moved into our new home, I started staying with him in his room until he fell asleep. We did this for about a week. Then I moved to my room (right next to his) so he knew I was there. By the third week I tucked him in and he was good to go. Now he goes up on his own after a hug and a kiss (but of course I follow minutes later to tuck him in.) You have to put your foot down, plain and simple. Tell her that once she goes to bed, that's it. Potty before laying down, no drinks (could cause bed wetting) and only one story. May take a week or so, but STICK with it. Once a child is tucked in bed they should be out in 1/2 hour tops. Watch her naps in the afternoon, she may be sleeping too much.

Answer 10

What your child is doing is learn-ed behaviour, My intention is not to make you feel bad as I have been there. Who else in your life do you allow to walk over you, whether you realize it or not. Children mimic what they see. Sadly when things get to a point that we are reaching out things have gone to far. Be firm, and show her how you would like to be treated. Kindness goes along with courtesy. If she would like to have a story before bed than she will have to finish half her dinner. One way to ensure she eats is cut away the bottle. It only fills her up. And for your own sack ask yourself why she still has one. The bottle is a great babysitter. It keeps her quiet. Perhaps, you are in need of the babying. How much integral support do you receive in dealing with the beddiebye horror. It may be necessary to let her father put her to bed, allow for yourself to receive help. Sometimes, Mommy feel they are the only ones who can make their children feel secure. Dad needs to stop telling you that you are doing wrong by your actions and get involved. As your daughter ages she will divide the house hold. Mom against Dad. Who's fault is it going to be then. MOM and DAD's. The communication between parents is far more important than ever as you are building the foundations for tomorrow. Begin how you mean to finish.