I live with my bfr. for over a year, moved in under circumstances, cuz I don't believe in cohabitation. He is much older and has three children from his previous marriage. I realize he is nor right for me, but still this noncommital relationship is bothering me, even though I would never force him into marriage. I feel it's just degrading for the woman to do that. I have to attend school for another year and I don't want to break up. So, should I stay with him and finish my school or move on and not waste my time? How can I cope with his noncommitment, since I can't move out yet???
2006-09-26 05:21:59 · 7 answers · asked by Mistyfog 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you already realize he's not the one for you, you should not consider marrying him just because you live together. That is much more degrading for both of you than merely living together, not to mention that it would be much harder to get out of a marriage than a cohabited relationship. You probably should consider getting a job and going to school only part time and focus on moving out as soon as possible, say, a couple months. That would be the least degrading thing to do all the way around, unless you feel that you can talk with him honestly and tell him how you feel and arrange to be merely roommates until you graduate, but I doubt he'll go for it.
2006-09-26 05:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by Laura Renee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So he's using you while you use him? Uh...sounds like cohabitation to me. So you want marriage and he doesn't but you don't want to move out. This is very weird. If you don't want to cohabitate and he's not right for you, then move out. If you don't want to move out then don't. Understand though you are currently cohabitating. The whole thing sounds degrading.
2006-09-26 12:28:04 · answer #2 · answered by MickYahoo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you live with him primarily for the financial benefits, he obviously makes possible for you to attend school. And since you do not think that he is a right person for you, you should feel lucky that he does not want commitment from you. I think that you are kind of selfish in your relation with your boyfriend, but be warned, such relation often backfires, and when you will want and need him, he may turn around and abandon you.
2006-09-26 12:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you said you realize he is not right for you, he doesn't want to make a commitment, but you don't want to break up? why not, if it's not working between the two of you, move out, don't use him until you finish school just to have a place to live, that's not right.
2006-09-26 12:30:35 · answer #4 · answered by Texas T 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get a job and move out. Staying there just to use him isn't right.
2006-09-26 12:25:06 · answer #5 · answered by Your_Star 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
darling get out of there. life is too short to spend not enjoying yourself. u say u r still in school? u have your entire life to live dont waste it on someone that doesnt want to commit to u. u owe it to yourself to find someone that loves and does want to be with u
2006-09-26 12:25:50 · answer #6 · answered by snoopdogg_211 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should move out. Don't mislead him or use him. Find a job and get out on your own.
2006-09-26 12:27:05 · answer #7 · answered by Bubbles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋