I'm divorced/single. I have a 20 yr. old daughter. Ever since she was about 14 yrs. old, she has been going back and forth (living) with me and her Father. I know in my heart that this is not going to work between her and her Father/Step Mom (again). Mom's the one who will have to pick up the pieces. I love my daughter dearly. She needs stability and direction. She needs her Father in her life, but at who's and what expense? What to say?
2006-09-26 04:11:23 · 11 answers · asked by sissycowgirl_64 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I went through the exact same thing and when I was living with my dad/stepmom they would always have fights which although they didn't think affected me it did. You need to tell your ex that he needs to keep his fights or the fact that they are not getting along private...he can't put your daughter through the same thing again!
2006-09-26 04:15:32 · answer #1 · answered by dana0086 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i bounced between my moms home an my fathers from about 7 yrs opld on i hated it when we[my sister an my brother] asked our mom to stay home we all sat down an talked an it was decided the 2 girls chose to stay with our mom an go to his house when we felt up to it an my little brother chose to live there you may have you your daughter your ex-husband the step mom all sit down an talk an let her decide what she wants its its uncomfortable for her there shell never be happy there we werent an your ex should if he cares acknowledge this an act upon her feelings if worst comes to worst as long as shes over 13 yrs old you can take her with you to court shell talk to the judge alone an explain her feelings awnser some questions an from what ive seen the judge usually always rules in the childs favor good luck
2006-09-26 04:19:29 · answer #2 · answered by misty w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
continue being Mom, picking up the pieces. Support her decision and express your thoughts and give some advise on what you think will make this a success's. Let her know that if something comes up, you are there and will offer advise when asked. Then talk with the ex and the step about your concerns and give a few suggestions.
2006-09-26 04:19:53 · answer #3 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter is matured enough to decide on her won. As an Indian, I feel the responsibility of female children are primraily with the mother because girls need the solce and guidance of their mother during various stages of growth. You need not worry about the stepmother as your daughter will decide on the matter. At whose expenses?? I really do not know...all I know is that if I were you, i wont look at that angle and shall look after her!!!
2006-09-26 04:16:58 · answer #4 · answered by THE WORRIER 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's 20 years old. Time for her to move out on her own instead of bouncing between both of you. She goes to where the going is good for a time, when it isn't working, she moves back to the other parent. She is using both of you. Probably punishing you both for not being together. You are doing her no favor in allowing her to continue in this behavior. Quit feeling guilty and allowing her to do this to you.
2006-09-26 04:15:05 · answer #5 · answered by Chloe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your only responsible for your actions. As mom the only thing you can do is be there for your daughter when and if the bottom falls out. I have found no matter what a parent does they will be forgiven sooner or latter.
2006-09-26 04:19:22 · answer #6 · answered by rollerbabe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is there to say...technically your daughter is an adult and her relationship (good or bad) with her father is whatever the 2 of them make of it. I would stay out of it and just make sure me and my daughters relationship was fine.
2006-09-26 04:28:51 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is 20, how about you talk to her about it and let her decide what she wants to do? You need to give her room to grow and she needs to start moving out and on...
2006-09-26 04:19:19 · answer #8 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun, at twenty your daughter can make her own desisons. Its tough to let go, but you're going to have to in the end.
2006-09-26 04:46:47 · answer #9 · answered by I think... 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter is an adult and can legally and ethically make such decisions on her own.
2006-09-26 04:14:27 · answer #10 · answered by finaldx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋