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Chris Rock (married 7 yrs to his high school sweetheart) once joked that "If you're married and never thought about this then your ain't in love.". He was talking about fleeing murderous thoughts towards a spouse LOL. Not obsessive, detailed ruminations. If you are having those SEEK HELP, ASAP! But upon them doing the same annoying thing for the 10.000th you have a brief fantasy about pushing them out of a skyscraper. Are these thoughts understandable, harmless and normal during a marriage of 5+ years or is this sick, bad, and something to be concerned about?

2006-09-25 16:18:18 · 17 answers · asked by Belle 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

17 answers

LOl honey Ive been married 14 yrs, and yes its normal

2006-09-25 16:36:11 · answer #1 · answered by wilowdreams 5 · 0 0

Honey, he said this in a joking manner because all of us, especially those that have been married for a long time, have had our spouses do some pretty annoying things. He said the "fleeing murderous thoughts" for crowd reaction. Sure, we all get annoyed and there are times we'll pull a Ralph Cramden ("one of these days Alice.....pow! Right in the kisser"), but I'm not quite sure we go to the lengths of declaring a murderous activity. I'll admit to times when I've said that I'm glad my husband is insured, but it was always done in a joking manner when he's doing something stupid. I can't ever recall wishing for his demise while I was angry. If you are getting so angry with each other to the point in which you think about murder, then it might be time to sit down and have a heart to heart before things escalate.

2006-09-25 16:27:33 · answer #2 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0 0

I think if it is just a fleeting thought in a joking manner then it is a way of release but if you are serious then get some help and get away from your spouse for a while, at least temporarily.

I feel from what you wrote that you love your spouse and just are still going thru the annoying and trying times. After a couple more years together it gets easier. You will look back and laugh about it then

I hope. Good Luck

2006-09-25 16:24:30 · answer #3 · answered by Kim M 2 · 0 0

I've been married for 2 1/2 years, so I don't have any of those thoughts (yet, lol). But my cousin has, and she says sometimes she wants to feed her man food that ain't cooked right or food that has been sitting in the fridge for weeks! She's too much. Well, he's still around, so I guess she hasn't given him salmonella or food poisoning yet! LOL

2006-09-25 16:29:13 · answer #4 · answered by MoMoney23 5 · 0 0

Not even thoughts but actual violent quarels are order of the day.Frankly they are necessary and add to strenghthning the bond.Loving couples do not stretch to next day.This has be OCCASSIONAL, if you continously think of killing your spouse take medical help ( i AM SERIOUS ).It can be 5+ yrs, 2+yrs or 20+yrs.

2006-09-25 16:49:19 · answer #5 · answered by shribharatpshubh 3 · 0 0

once in a life time it might be normal. More then that I would say seek counciling. I had a friend whose husband had those few violent thoughts about his wife. He eventually started to use those thoughts he beat her and in front of the children.
talk to a councilor about them

2006-09-25 16:43:11 · answer #6 · answered by mamayer6 5 · 0 0

We all have thoughts about something you wanna do, but when you try to act upon them that's when you know you have a problem.
If someone is serious about harming their spouses or significant others they need to seek help or leave them alone

2006-09-25 16:21:28 · answer #7 · answered by miss_lady6980 3 · 0 0

id sometimes fanatsize about pushing my father off a cliff, or poisoning him in his food, or hitting his birdbrain using his golfclubs. But that comes in once in a while, when i think him being a complete jerk

I think its pretty normal, as long as u dont think about it too often

2006-09-25 19:41:41 · answer #8 · answered by meikon80 1 · 0 0

Be concerned. If my husband had thoughts like that I would be single.

2006-09-25 16:21:37 · answer #9 · answered by Crazy Mary 2 · 0 0

I have had a few violent thoughts concerning my ex-husband...haha

2006-09-25 16:23:10 · answer #10 · answered by victorian.ivory 2 · 0 0

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