Me and my husband are really not ready for kids right now(im on birth control). So theres always the percentage that you could get pregnant. He always says,"Well if you get pregnant then it will work out somehow". But i dont see it happening with our jobs and bills.
Did both of u have a GOOD PAYING JOB when u found out u were having a baby???? If not how did everthing work out?? If so, did everything flow smoothly??
2006-09-25 10:17:16 · 25 answers · asked by **What??** 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think your husband is right if you happen to do get pregnant everything will work out some how. I don't think anyone is ever financially ready to have a baby. Dont worry everything will be fine. Good luck.
2006-09-25 10:44:22 · answer #1 · answered by BadAssGirlINWV 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me start by saying that if you and hubby want to wait until you have a decent income etc before you have children .. well you'll be waiting a long time.
Everyone needs to learn that you're never going to be 100% ready to have a child. Granted having a good paying job and a decent home helps but bringing a child into the world is more than just that. Financially .. it's bloody expensive no matter how you look at it.
We were not ready at all when I found out I was pregnant the first time. He was the only one working and was heavily in debt at the time. I was very young, well so was he and we didn't know what to do .. didn't know if we could make it.
I'll admit, there were times it was very tough, not only financially but mentally/emotionally too. There are days when you feel like giving up and you think you're doing everything wrong for your child .. but there are days when everything just seems to work.
We started out on a rough road but managed to pull it together, not only for us but for our children (we have two kids now). We started out with a crappy apartment and not a lot of money but have managed to buy a house and get our finances in order.
Life is good - it just takes some work, some days more than others.
Your hubby has the right frame of mind - you will work it all out somehow .. even if you hit a rough patch .. as long as you work together things should turn out ok.
2006-09-25 17:30:33 · answer #2 · answered by bluesie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We had been married about 2 months when my wife got pregnant. We were definitely not ready, financially or emotionally. We were using birth control but nothing is 100%. We discussed abortion and while I don't believe it's my right to tell someone else what decision to make, we didn't think it was the right thing to do. My daughter is now 22 and although it was difficult, we made it work. I do honestly believe that if you wait until you're both "ready", you'll never have kids, because you will also spend to what you make and being a parent involves tremendous sacrafice by both parents. I'm in my late 40's and my kids are chronologically adults. I have two sisters who are within 4 years in age of me and their 4 kids (each has 2) are 9, 7, 4 and 2. There are pros and cons to having them at a younger age versus having them at a later date. Hopefully, your husband is someone who will help out and be involved.
Good luck to you.
2006-09-25 17:27:15 · answer #3 · answered by Phillip B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I got pregnant in late 2004, my husband had a good paying job, I did not. Money was an issue, but everything did work out. My son is now 2 years old and we have both gotten great jobs, making more money, and the struggle we had was sometimes hard, but worth it. I was always told, by anyone, whenever I said we needed more money before we had a baby that "you will never have enough money". It will work out somehow. Every married couple needs a baby and God will provide you with what you need. Good luck and just imagine the fun you'll have trying to get pregnant! :)
God Bless!
2006-09-25 17:23:27 · answer #4 · answered by brandiwhine 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl, me and my husband had our baby before we were married. but, to answer your question, no we didn't have good paying jobs. I was working at a fast food place and he was working at a grocery store. This worked out because after you have your child you suddenly realize that you need to get on the ball for your child to have a secure future. So, I went to a tech. school for 8 months and worked also, now I have a great job with great pay and great hours in a Dr's office, and he got a second job and well, the bills are paid, the family is happy and, because I got a good job my husband can take off whenever he feels like he needs a rest, so if it happens just go with the flow, you'll be okay.
2006-09-25 21:40:20 · answer #5 · answered by Dominique F 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, we were ready to have a baby. No we both didn't have good paying jobs. But we got by and we are doing fine. We now have two kids. There is no possible way you can ever truly afford to have kids no matter how good of a job you have. But you find a way to make it work. You don't want to be on the verge of loosing everything and being kicked out on the streets. But I beleive you have to be financially stable. Unexpected things do and will come up. You cannot avoid that. Thank heaven for insurance!! We are not wealthy by any means. I am a stay at home mom. We do not have a lot of nice things or spend lots of money on whatever. We do have to bugdet things and be careful with our money. We are doing fine. We are about to build a house and things are great. But my kids are first priority. We had to make lots of sacrifices for our children's sake, but I wouldn't change it for the world.
If you are not ready to have children, don't!! You both should be ready. Of course, there are those little "oops" but deal with that if it happens. Until then, enjoy your life. If you want to play and go out, do so before the kids, cause it gets a lot harder after theiy're here.
You do what you have to do for your family.
Good luck!!
2006-09-25 17:27:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have personally never known anyone who got pregnant and was financially ready. If you can eat and pay your bills, then you don't have anything to worry about. If you're having a hard time, there are always options.
If you have too many bills, you can either get a 2nd job for a little bit and pay a couple of things off, cut the cable down... etc. You can also consolidate student loans and credit cards, as well a refinance cars and houses and stuff.
There's no reason you CAN'T work it out. There are LOTS of kids out there and most belong to people who weren't financially ready.
Remember that your kids will come before bills anyhow so there's no reason y'all can't eat or whatever. You will truely be fine.
2006-09-25 17:21:42 · answer #7 · answered by Mama R 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No one is ever ready for a baby no matter how ready they think they are. My husband and I both had crappy jobs when I got pregnant. Financially we struggled for the next 5 years. I always had a job, but my husband worked intermittently. As of two years ago we are a single income at my house and while we are not independently wealthy we get by. I work 50 hours a week, and my husband is a stay at home dad. We are not rich, but we are all happy.
2006-09-25 17:40:58 · answer #8 · answered by OrianasMom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As youll see by the other answers to the question the common theme is rarely are you ever financially ready for another member of the family. I have 3...twins coming the 2nd time. It was a huge surprise to have twins and we worry about money more often than id like to admit. Somehow things work out every time though....and our credit scores are over 800. Best of luck and remember...if you wait until you think you are ready youll never have children. Best of luck and go for it when youre ready for it responsibility wise, not financially.
2006-09-25 17:34:13 · answer #9 · answered by Johnny 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are mature enough to be married you are ready to have kids. We had our first child while I was a sophomore at college earning $6.36/hr. We made it just fine and I finished my graduate degree 6 years ago. It is not peaches and cream but it sure makes you grow up fast. It is well-worth the sacrifice. We've never been to Hawaii or on a cruise but we know the joy of counting pennies to go on our weekly dates when we were young. We are so much more in love now because we were not selfish from the beginning. Good luck!
2006-09-25 23:21:19 · answer #10 · answered by Professor 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋