Gay>Bisexual<Striaght was is a choice???

Question

I deem my self and african american bisexual teenage boy and I when it comes down 2 it i dont really know if i had a choice or not i mean its a choice to call my self bisexual but on the inside i dont feel like it was my choice cause i an remember being attracted to boys since the time before i started school so i wanna know at yall are thinking bout this issue tell me please?

Answer 1

The American Medical Association (AMA) does NOT believe
that it is a choice - most doctors and researchers believe that it
is a function of pre-natal (genetic) or gestational events, not
something that happens after birth.

There are lots of interesting studies having to do with the
subtle physiological differences between hetero- and homo-
sexual men.

As of yet, we have found no physiological differences between
hetero- and homo-sexual women.

Of course, neurology is not, by any stretch, a complete
science. We know less than we don't know...

Answer 2

Your sexual preferences are never a choice, the choice is whether or not to act on them. If you are, in fact, bi-sexual then nature has dealt you a rough hand, straights and gays alike will revile and denigrate you, just look at the answers your question has received. They keep saying you have to make a choice, but not one of them that I've seen has ever come up with a single reason WHY you must a choice. They say you have to pick a label, and that they alone have the right to decide what your options are, because none of them can deal with the idea that you are simply being you, and that they have no control over that. They will also tell you that if you are Bi you can never have a happy monogamous relationship. This is a bald faced lie since I am bi and after a number of relationships, both casual and long term, I finally found the right person and settled down. The gender of the right person was, quite simply, not an issue. They also don't address the question of why you should even have to be content with one person, a Bi lady friend of mine has achieved a perfectly happy long term relationship with a man and a woman. She refers to them as her wife and husband. They are all perfectly happy in a situation that works for all concerned. Don't ever let someone else dictate what "should" make you happy, it is for you to determine for yourself what does make you happy, and then work to achieve it. Mutually enjoyable activities between consenting adults in the privacy of their own home are nobody elses business, and if other people don't like, be damned to the lot of them.

Answer 3

Dear M_M

I am really glad that you have come to this conclusion so early on in life. It took me far longer. I don't think you really have much choice about this. It's more important to learn how to accept it.
Being bisexual is not an easy route to take. You can never be truly sexually satisfied by one person. A lot of people will diss you for this, even here.
What you do now is up to you. But don't ignore what your nature requires. You'll end up deceiving yourself and deceiving others.

Answer 4

Stop worrying about how you got there. Even if it was a choice, you can't go back in time and change it. Adopt the mentality that you are who you are. Accepting it makes your life a lot less stressful. Just work on figuring out who you want to be with. That's what's important.

Answer 5

My attractions were NEVER a choice, my actions are!
My actions do NOT define my sexuality, my attractions do.

I identify as a lesbian leaning bisexul female who's very much in touch with her feminine side, but who appreciates men and women who indentify as they see fit.
I love people who are honest, caring, creative and compassionate.
I do not have time to tollerage dispassionate or hateful people in my life.

I am a mother, first and foremost. I know that what I do, shows my child throw example. If I love the people in my life, my son will learn to love.
If I spend more time hating those who are different from me, I will only teach my son to hate. If I do not love myself, I teach my son to not have self esteam. If I do not care about the people in my life, I teach my son to not have compassion.
If I show patience and truly listen as well as help when and where I can, I teach my son patience, compassion, and how to be a good listener.

My son has been the greatest joy in my life. To dishonor that gift would be a digrace I could not bare.

Answer 6

Does it really matter how we came to love, as long as we do it?

Since you're in your teens, your hormones, identity, and attractions will be in flux, and that's okay. But I'm not going to say your identity is any more messed-up than that of your straight classmates. They're believed; you should be, too.

If you also like girls that way, you're bi. If not, you're gay. And that's fine, whichever way you end up.

Oh, and for many people, bisexuality is NOT a "purgatory" or way station. I've been 50/50 bi ever since I was five; I'm 32 now.

Answer 7

I think a lot of the attraction a person feels for whichever gender(s) ends up being hardwired in at an early time in life. Don't know if it's biological, social, or something else though.

Reason I suspect this is that gay behaviors continue even in times and places were they are lethally unpopular.

Answer 8

You are born this way how you identify your self is a choice. Doesn't change who you are though.

And for the Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve idiot .

God made Adam and Eve and Steve and Joyce and Jane and everyone else and God made some of us straight and some of us homosexual and some of us bisexual. Get over yourself please. Stop trying to question the will of God. You need to stop telling me to that you love me and hate what I do. Jesus did not command you to love me on your terms he commands you to love me as you found me. so don't say you love the sinner and hate the sin. Because that means you do not love me as I am but as you want me to be. Get a life people and stop judging us. Why would we insist that God made us this way if it was not true how could we stand having to put up with your hatred of us if it was not true.

Answer 9

My personal belief and experience, and in accordance with everything i have read that makes logical and scientific sense is that we are all born with a percentage of attraction to the same sex. This can be as everything else is, from 0-100%. Everything else in this world, from shades of skin color to the different foods we like, is at different levels of intensity, i.e., some are extremely religious all the way to non-religious.

The sex you are attracted to just like the food you are attracted to is not a choice. The choice is whether you choose to live your life being, as everyone tells you to be in every other area, honest with yourself and being who you truly are.

Nature isn't evil. And before something can be called unnatural, it has to not exist in nature. And homosexuality does. Religion has been used for centuries to separate peoples and to hold down races and sexes.

I have run into so many scenarios in my life. What we choose to call ourselves or what others choose to call us, isn't what makes us who or what we are.

The taboo status that homosexuality has is what has talk people to hide, taught people to lie to society, themselves and their partners and family.

This lying and hiding has also contributed to the AIDS epidemic. If just the "straight" and "bi-sexual" men were able to be open and honest, we could of saved a lot of deaths.

Honesty is taught by the bible. and by just about every parent in the world. by pursacuting people who have attraction of the same sex, each participant is judging others and this too is not supposed to be our roles in this life.

I am 38 years old. I have memories of attraction to both sexes as early as 5. I still have the same attractions but i am in a gay relationship and i am monogamous with my partner. I do live mostly in the gay world when it comes to friends and activities. But my activities doesn't take away my like for the other sex. I believe that because of society i have chosen to live more of the gay life, but if society was different and i was more accepted, i would interact with both sexes sexually.

A man can be gay and never touch a man. A man can be straight and never touch a woman. gay isn't just what you do, it's what is in your mind. i went to a batsmitsfa once, but i am not jewish.

Answer 10

When you are a teenager your hormones go nuts. You will need to wait a while before you know which way you are going. Either way it is your choice and it will be a choice that you will have to live with. Bisexual is like pergatory you are just waiting to see what your destiny is.
Good Luck!