My boyfriend and I were friends for three years then started a relationship, 4 months later I moved in with him. we have been datng for over a year, just bought a house over the summer. We are talking about having kids, marriage, etc. This is the lan-but what is taking him so long to ask the question!?
2006-09-25 03:54:55 · 26 answers · asked by llisaisme80 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I suggest you don't wait for the question, for it might never come. There are guys who are afraid of commitment or who are waiting for a better girl to come around so he can dump you. I seriously suggest you start making arrangements for a wedding. Keep talking about it. You have to be very focussed on what you want. If you allow it, he will drag this relationship on without marrying you for another 4 yrs and then another 4 more til forever. Look out for yourself, act now.
Get your parents to help out by asking him what are his intentions since you have been going out for over a year. If you are in your mid-twenties, tell him you are not getting any younger and if you want children, you need to have them when you are young or else complications will come in such as mental retardation or Down Syndrome.
So forget about the proposal (since you are already living together) and jump right in to the wedding plans.
2006-09-25 15:58:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you two were friends for 3 years before dating, looks like the subject would have come up? I wouldn't bring children into the relationship until after a marriage of another couple of years. Spend a little time just enjoying the relationship that you have, and all else will fall in place.
2006-09-25 04:04:23 · answer #2 · answered by charlies mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's taking his time. He'll ask when he's ready.
You can always propose to him you know. There is no rule that says men must be the ones to do the asking.
Or just bring up the subject one evening. Talk to him seriously about how he sees the future going for the two of you. If he just gives generalized answers about it, like "Oh, one day we'll get married and have kids" then ask him "When?" Let him know that you are ready, and that you would like an honest answer from him about how he feels about it. You have to tell him that you are ready now, and you don't want to keep putting things off until a future date.
2006-09-25 04:03:01 · answer #3 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is not ready yet. Don't rush him. If he is not ready and you push him into it he will resent you. You probably should have waited on the house until you were married though. Maybe he feels pressured about marriage. Just let it go for a while and see what happens. If he forgets all about it then after a while bring it up again and tell him that's the way you want your life to go and see if that's still where its headed with the two of you. If he still isn't ready to commit tell him your thinking about moving on and finding someone who is looking for the same future as you. Good Luck
2006-09-25 04:01:30 · answer #4 · answered by smile4u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be a case of "let's not fix what ain't broke". Sounds like all is going well and most likely the thought hasn't crossed his mind to "rock the boat". It's a known statistic that long term relationships with co-habitation involved seem to fall apart if marriage is brought into the equation. It makes no sense but it does happen.
2006-09-25 03:57:56 · answer #5 · answered by jvano35 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He just wants to make sure it is going to work out. You 2 should take your time and just "feel the waters" don't just jump in. You guys may have done great as friends, but that doesn't mean you guys will be great together. im sure that is one thing going through his mind right now. Just keep in mind that if he does want to spend the rest of his life with you, when he is ready he will ask. Don't worry the time will come.
2006-09-25 03:58:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's probably ready but just waiting for the right time and right proposal.. or yet, he's having a hard time finding you the right ring. he just can't ask you in a way as simple as you think it should be. most mature men I know also plan and hope to make it the most memorable proposal there is.
as for you, don't expect and assume anything soon. the most unexpected proposal are always the sweetest. so just sit back, relax and enjoy the relationship. =)
2006-09-25 04:01:38 · answer #7 · answered by kamahalan_12 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to be the one to tell you, but if a man hasn't proposed to you after 6 months of dating, he doesn't think you're the one. He'll date you and be with you, but he won't commit and now that you're living with him, he's got everything he wants without having to buy a ring and attend the wedding. My husband asked me to go ring shopping after we dated for 1 month. He proposed 3 months later at a large charity event in huge of a front crowd to surprise me. We then saved up our money and had a wedding a year and a half later -- but the point is, I had the ring. The commitment was there. We've now been married a year and together for a total of 3. But in your case, no ring means no commitment.
It's clearly obvious that this guy is only with you until the woman of his dreams comes along. Be careful.
2006-09-25 04:07:31 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Maybe hes just comfortable with the situation the way it is. Or he feels he needs to be ready to make that kind of commitment. Be patient. You dont say how long you have been living together. He probably wants to make sure you are the One.
2006-09-25 03:57:45 · answer #9 · answered by JC 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I knew the guy replaced into too lots of a wuss to do it then sure, if no longer i could look ahead to him :) because of the fact i've got continuously needed the sensation of being proposed to, all the romance and that..
2016-12-12 14:42:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋