This weekend my husband did something low and stupid and lied to me about it. I knew in my heart he was lying, yet he turned it around and made me start doubting myself. Finally he told me the truth after a day of lying like a dog about it. It really hurt me and now I feel I can't trust him. If this sounds familar, how did you deal with it? Every time I think about it, I get enraged. Any stories or advice?
2006-09-25 03:53:22 · 12 answers · asked by limeallure 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband did the same thing - something stupid and then lied and made me think I was being paranoid until he finally told the truth 2 days later and all along I was right (no, he didn't cheat it was something else). And it seriously broke my trust in him.
All I can say is, in time it starts to get a little easier but it's going to bother you inside for a long time. It's been almost 2 years for me and I still have problems with it sometimes. But I haven't caught (nor have I suspected) him lying since so hopefully he learned his lesson. Again, time will tell...
Good luck to you :)
2006-09-25 04:00:23 · answer #1 · answered by Avid 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People lie, even to their spouses. And most men will tell big ole lies just to avoid their wifes going off about something. I know this because I have worked in alot of bars and restaurants. I overhear cell phone calls all the time..."I'll be right home, I'm still at work", etc... I also know that my Dad used to lie to my Mom about similar stuff. I also hear the guys I work with at the office telling their wives little lies about stuff.....How late they were here, etc..
It's a shame, because it does wind up hurting a relationship eventually. But, as long as you haven't had any other problems, maybe you want to consider letting it go. Or have a long talk about why it is so important to be honest with eachother. Nobody likes to be lied to.
2006-09-25 11:00:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it really depends on how big the lie was, i mean if it was a little fib, like maybe you have done to him> then i would try to forgive & forget, but if it was something that truly you cant get over you have to discuss it with him b/c if it will end up ruining your marriage if you keep it in, everytime you think about it you'll get mad, you wil end up acting mean & mad at him & he will have no clue what he did wrong b/c he thought you already got over this, so it wouldnt even occur to him, then he will get angry thinking your being nasty to him for what he thinks is no reason.. so aslong as it was something you eventually can get over & isnt a reason to not be w/him the best way is to talk it out til you know everything you need to feel at ease ----good luck!
2006-09-25 10:59:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a male and My wife told me to be honest with her and I told her even if I am honest you will be mad and she said no I won't i will be hurt but I will get over it since you being honest. and I learned so much Being so honest with her from the day I met her and married to her for 9 years. smiling. and I was lucky to have a wife like that not get mad at me for being honest. and I am glad. smiling. I do lie but not in bad way but like i hide the money and she found out and she said you have money she smiled and I said yeah I have money and she said why didn't you do that. I was try to save money so I can give you the money to have your teeth fixed. because you wasn't very happy about yoru teeth. she smile you did a good job. smilin
2006-09-25 12:24:22 · answer #4 · answered by greenbaypackers1920 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He will continue to do so... You have to change your ways... in your own words you are a "free spirit", you find life humorous and you see things with an open mind... All these things leave the door wide open for him to do whatever he likes...
2006-09-25 11:13:38 · answer #5 · answered by deakjone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he told you the truth after one day its OK that means he is a nice guy cause there are some guys ho never tell the truth
2006-09-25 11:08:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Of course he has and I've not told him everything all the time either.
Just as you probably have not been completely honest either.
forgive him and move on.
2006-09-25 10:56:13 · answer #7 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well as you know nobody is perfect what was the lie about was it so drastic that you cannot trust him anymore or was it it little white lye think about we all lye at one point or another
2006-09-25 10:58:31 · answer #8 · answered by reddiwhip2004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
*Yes, I know how you feel.
*Don't get upset.
*That's human nature.
*Human love is of selfish nature.
*Divine love is unconditional.
*Always put your trust in God.
*He will never ,never let you down
*Jesus loves you with an everlasting and unconditional love inspite of our evil and rebellous nature.
*Put your sole trust in Him alone.
*God bless you !
.
2006-09-25 11:11:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never lie to my wife, I tell her everything she wants to hear!!!
2006-09-25 10:59:59 · answer #10 · answered by Married Male 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋