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I found a name with an e-mail address in my husband's address book, I sent this women an e-mail message and she told me that he was trying to get with her because him and I are apart, not devoriced yet. we've been married for 11 year's and it hurt's that he is doing this to me and his 8 year old daughter. He don't even call to talk with his daughter. I don't beleave in cheatting and he made a promise to me and GOD when we got married. He's never here for me and his daughter or his step children, all he does is call us name's and make's us look bad in front of every one, My mother inlaw even put's her own grandchild down, never got her a thing for her birthday or xmas, Please tell me what i can do to take this hurt away. Oh! he alway's tell's peaple that i stop him from wanting to visit or call with his daughter, And to let everyone know that is not true. I told him that i would never stop him from visiting or calling her. HE IS A BIG TIME ALCOHOLIC. i will not let her go with him alone

2006-09-25 02:36:27 · 29 answers · asked by loubell 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

29 answers

He's not interested in you or the kid so cut him (and his family) loose and move on!

2006-09-25 02:44:17 · answer #1 · answered by DialM4Speed 6 · 0 0

If he is an alcoholic, then seeing his child may not be in your child's best interests. Also, how much of his b.s. is the alcohol talking? As far as him telling others lies, don't worry about it. As long as you and your children know the truth, that is all that matters. Your mother-in-law is obviously moronic. If she is putting her own blood down and being nasty, then I would suggest you tell her that if she values her teeth, then she needs to shut her mouth. she is damaging your child's self-esteem and you shouldn't let anyone do that. Also, if you two are separated and in the process of getting a divorce, then the other woman shouldn't matter. In fact, it is almost like a blessing. He will be someone else's problem soon enough. And, remember, all of his lies will be revealed eventually and it sounds like a lot of people will be owing you an apology. Until then, concentrate on what is best for you and your child and let the rest of the crap "roll off". Enjoy your daughter and to hell with him!

2006-09-25 02:45:54 · answer #2 · answered by blackwidow 3 · 0 0

Forget about the seperation and go straight to divorce.Its obvious he has no love or respect for you.Hes trying to get with other girls and lying on you and not being there for his child not to mention he has an alcohol problem.Get rid of him now he will only cause more pain.For the pain you alreadsy have there is no little pill you can take to cure that pain,thats something that would sell like hot cakes.The only thing that is going to cure that is time.As for the mother in law i would tell her exactly how you feel about the ratty ***** for downing her grandchild like that.Whatever problem she has with you or her son should not be her grandchilds fault.Your child dosent need to be around that and if i were you i would do everything in my power to keep the child away from that.I wish you the best of luck

2006-09-25 02:48:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

k, now this is a hard one. what should u do about your cheating husband? u said u have a 8yr old daughter. u know, divorce does not sound like a real option, because it will also ruin ur daugther's life.
what i think u should do, get in shape and make ur husband love u like he did when u got married. but who am i to tell u what to do?
remember that u too made a promise to God and that u have a child to take care of. my grandpa was a big time alcoholic and my family literaly forced him to go to a center for curing alcoholics. he didn't like that, but he's not an alcoholic anymore! he's together with his wife and takes care of family business.
take care.
(btw, my grandma ain't respecting him to much and many times they fight with words. the truth is that he teases her all the time. now i don't know how u can fix that without becoming a true christian, one that reads AND applies the Bible principles no mather now hard it is in this evil world(2Chr4:4) )

2006-09-25 02:57:14 · answer #4 · answered by James Blond 4 · 0 0

"HE IS A BIG TIME ALCOHOLIC"...you should have said that first and saved your breath on the rest of the story. The man needs treatment. You should move him out, or move out yourself until he stops drinking and gets clean. Alcoholics will take everyone down with them. They are selfish and you will never change his behavior on your own. You are damaging your kids by staying with this drunk. So move out...or have him leave..let him to to his new girlfriends house...whatever!!! Just get away from him until he stops drinking. This is not a good environment for anyone to be put into. And you can join Alnon for families. Godloveya.

2006-09-25 02:40:44 · answer #5 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0 0

Send him to a Divine Retritement Center....

See mam, i heard lots of these kinds of things since i was young. According to me, he might have lost his way a little bit. What you have to do is to keep on chasing him till you suceed in getting what you decerved. You have to keep on contacting him, tell about her daughter's good things, b in mind... dont say bad things which makes him blame you for that too.. love him a lot and lot and lot.... after that tell him to come with you to the Devine Counsellor or a Priest for single time. Talk to him abt this often. If GOD wishes that to live together, then you will suceed for sure.... GOD is with you. This, if you are willing to continue this relation..

If you are not willing to, then give the same taste as you are getting.. Go..... search for someone else...

2006-09-25 02:49:18 · answer #6 · answered by Ranjith 1 · 0 0

Your best bet.. see a counselor. My sister is currently in a relationship with a man who is the same and I'll tell you the same thing.. relationships like this become an addiction, you get used to the "abuse" and don't know how to form real bonds with people. Get out completely if not for you for your children. Remember what you do leads the way to what they do in their own lives. good luck and God bless

2006-09-25 02:41:42 · answer #7 · answered by Gidgy 2 · 0 0

He doesn't sound like he has much going for himself so you need to pick up the pieces and move on. Always save a small piece of your heart for yourself so when/if things fall apart you still have some pride and love for yourself. I commend you on not letting your daughter go with him it is your responsibility to keep your children safe as a mother,

2006-09-25 02:45:35 · answer #8 · answered by savy1rose 1 · 0 0

leave him what are you thinking, you need to get the children away from him and so what if he doesn't call go on with you re life and take care of what you need to take care of, if you don't leave this alone its only going to do damage to the kids and if you have girls then they are going to grow up in life thinking this is the way relationships go and that's not true. Leave him and get some counseling for you and you're kids to get through this, and believe me you will good luck

2006-09-25 02:43:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Guess what?!? You and your children are sooooooo much better off without this loser. Don't let it hurt you he is out of your life and that's a good thing..... Your daughter doesn't need his or his family's influence in her life. Move on and get over it. Don't E-Mail anyone about him again, that only brings you down, concentrate on going forward... Good luck!!!

2006-09-25 02:45:39 · answer #10 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0 0

You ALREADY know the answer to your question!
You know you need to move on but can you?
You know you need to stop letting his family hurt you, but will you?
If you love yourself and your family first then you will do what is best. What if your sister or best female friend asked this question you would know what to do. So put all the hope of change aside and do what you know is right for you and your daughter.

2006-09-25 02:39:33 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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