Ok I just my second son last week and my 2 year old is really not feeling me nor the baby. I try to tell him this is your baby and you gotta protect him and all that good stuff... But he is just like "NO Do want it" that's what he says.. What in the world can I do to help him get use to the new baby and he has to share mommy now?
2006-09-24 18:18:07 · 15 answers · asked by msp2k6 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
We just had our second child three months ago. Our four year old had a hard time adjusting at first. He wouldn't talk to me and did not want to even mess with the baby. My husband and I would take time to spend with just him. While he played with our youngest, I would play with our oldest and vice versa. I started letting our little boy have more responsibility and help with the baby. We also bought him a special big brother gift. Really talk up being a big brother. Don't worry, he will come around.
2006-09-24 18:27:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Try and make as much time for your 2 year old as you can. He needs to see that the baby is an addition to the family and not an invader trying to take it away from him. Encourage him to help with the baby and have family time together as well as seperate time doing things with your son. It'll soon pass as he's just a bit unsettled right now, a new baby is a big change to any family so it's only natural he's going to feel a bit put out. I've got it all to come as my second is due in january and my little girl will be 22 months! EEEK!
Good luck and congratulations on the new baby!
2006-09-24 22:36:38 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try telling him you need a helper. Kids his age will often go for that. Unfortunately, he is going to be upset and you can't really do anything but try and make it less upsetting for him. Try involving him, like asking him to get a diaper for the baby or a bottle for the baby or help with what the baby should wear, etc. If you can re-direct his attention he might be more accepting. And don't forget to make time just for him without the baby. Maybe while the baby is sleeping during the day, ya'll could read a story or make cookies or something like that. He'll get over it. Just make sure you NEVER leave him alone with the baby. I'm sure you knew that. Children that age often accidentally hurt their young siblings.
2006-09-24 18:28:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a common problem unfortunately. He will get used to having the baby around soon enough. For now, try spending some quality time with him when the baby is sleeping, just to let him know that he is not losing you completely. That is how he feels, like the baby gets you now and he is being pushed aside. It is nothing that you did, he is just too young to understand that you can love more than one person the same. You have to keep trying and keep involving him in everything that you do with the baby. Ask him to get diapers and such, let him know that he is important too. In his eyes, you don't have time for him anymore and someone else has taken his place. I know how hard it is when you have a newborn. It's almost like you don't have time for him, but you have to make time. It will get easier, maybe not right away, but it will. One thing that I do is get a sitter for a couple of hours every week and spend that time with my older daughter only. This helps her to feel important, and we both look forward to our time together. Good luck. I wish you the best.
2006-09-24 18:27:48 · answer #4 · answered by momoftwo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just have to show him that you love him as much as the new baby and when he feels that mommy hasnt deserted him for the new baby he will begin to bond with it.
2006-09-25 01:02:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its' definately kinda embarrassing saying this... but when i was 17 (i'm now 21) my parents had a 4th child (i have two other sis's 17/18 now) and we all were JEALOUS as hell. We LOVED knowing we had a baby brother... cuz we all loved babies... but it was the fact that they kinda pushed us aside, not purposely or "KNOWINGLY" ... but they did... and it felt awful! So we had to "INVOLVE" ourselves... by helping out and doing anything we could to kinda "GET IN THE WAY" lol... but that just proved that we all loved each other and wanted to be there for each other as a FAMILY! ... SO yeah I'm sure he's just feeling jealous that he's not getting ALL the attention he was used to... so definately involve him as much as you can, MULTI-TASKING with children is hard, but always MANAGEABLE! I babysit and DEFINATELY understand the childs needs of this multi-tasking... it always comes with kids... lol... but yeha...hope things go well ... GOOD LUCK!
2006-09-24 19:13:00 · answer #6 · answered by sweetsuezq4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's just too young to comprehend the good points of having a new brother. All he sees is everyone cooing and coddling the new-comer, and paying less attention to him. At his age there's not much you can do, short of spending more time with him.
2006-09-24 18:31:28 · answer #7 · answered by RazzleDazzle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The one big possibility is THE ELDER ONE IS FEELING NEGLECTED, in favour of the younger one.
Just look carefully, and avoid such actions which are likely to cause " a feeling " of being neglected. Include the elder child in taking care of the younger, giving a partnership in such actions, responsibilities, etc... It has to work !
2006-09-24 19:03:33 · answer #8 · answered by Spiritualseeker 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he'll catch on, sweetie. maybe explaining it a lil more realistically, like this is your baby brother, and he is going to want to be just like you! rather than it's "your" baby. he'll come'round, tho, and they will be close at heart, planning ways to get at you and sneaking cookies and all that good stuff!
2006-09-24 19:01:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just don't give too much attention to your new baby... Remember you got another son also...:) your son will get used to it somehow
:)
2006-09-24 23:38:51 · answer #10 · answered by bebe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋