Do I have a problem? Whenever I'm alone I feel sad and cry.
2006-09-24 15:08:20 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
After looking at your previous questions, I feel very sorry for you. I truly hope you have a good friend or a mother or someone else in your life who you can talk to and trust. You are going through a very hard time, please dont let any guy take advantage of that, especially your boss!
If you do not have anyone who you can talk to, try an online free counceling organization. Link is below
2006-09-25 08:23:08 · answer #1 · answered by Wilson Wilson 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lonely, dependent, probably low self-esteem. I have the same problems, but they manifest with this philosophy:
If I can't function without someone in my life, then I certainly can't function with someone in my life. That need, it signifies how uncomfortable you are with your independence because you can't function either way...alone or with someone. But, you must learn to function alone...because no matter what great relationships you have everything will all come back to you...and you will be alone again, at some point, even if it's for a moment. You must learn to depend and find comfort within yourself if you're ever going to be happy in life, and especially be part of an intimate relationship. Merging is great, to be the 'other half' of someone, but you'll find that by losing your own self you are slowly dying...as your identity is so dependent on that guy that you're lost and no one when he isn't around.
I know how this feels. I don't trust myself with relationships and prefer to be alone and crying than in that compromising situation of losing my identity whenever I'm with someone else.
I guess I'm saying we probably have a similar problem, mine is just flipped around from yours. I'm afraid I'll do exactly what you're doing if I let myself get too close to someone.
Therapy...self-esteem is key to feeling complete when you're completely alone. It's possible you could be co-dependent or have a relationship addiction.
I have much compassion for you...I know how confusing this can be.
2006-09-24 23:10:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is only a problem if you believe its a problem, and if you think its impeading on your quality of life. It makes no matter what anyone else thinks, because it is your life and only you can choose what to do with it and how to live it. I know exactly what you are talking about because I am the same way. I can not function without a girl being in my life. I generally describe myself as only being half a person. I have so many missing pieces and defects that I need to replace them with pieces of other peoples lives. I need them to complete who I am, but then I am no longer me. See where i am going with this? You are sad and alone when you dont have someone with you because you dont know who you are without them. You feel that part of you is missing, and when you find out what that part is you wont need anyone else to complete you. I know this is hard, I still have not been able to do it myself, but at least I am aware of why I feel the way I do.
2006-09-25 14:59:14 · answer #3 · answered by Robert s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I have the same problem and I have been working on it for years now... they tell me I have to learn to love myself and have my own self worth before I can feel complete without a man...
Easier said than done... I still havent gotten to the point where being single and lonely is comfortable for me, but since I have gotten on certain medications and worked on loving myself by realizing personally how lucky I really am compared to ALOT of people in the world I do feel better... I wont just deal with the bull$hit b/c i dont want to be alone... its a very slow but possible process.
Just look at yourself and realize what you see and think of all the good things and what you could have to deal with... and if your like me you know what I am talking about... you look at yourself in the mirror and see the pretty but you dont feel it... so take a second and imagine how bad it COULD be and how LUCKY you are, if only in the physical aspect its a step in the right direction =)
2006-09-24 22:25:26 · answer #4 · answered by BeachLvr2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is that you don't know how to go out without trying to at least see who is interested. If you constantly need your good looks validated then when will you work on your mind. You need to set some small goals and go on without all these distractions. You look like you won't have a problem meeting any guys even if you take a vacation from them. And get away from girls who only talk about guys. Like the other people said, "go to school" meet someone female who is all about success and studying and try to scale back on the guys, but to be honest, I don't think you will.
2006-09-24 22:48:20 · answer #5 · answered by dingbat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What makes you think "a guy" is what you need? A guy could just make your situation even worse. Why not take the time to inquire into what it really is that you're lacking. Don't make the mistake of assuming it's a guy, a girl, or another person. Everybody has problems and if you get entangled with another person, you take on their problems, too. Beware!
2006-09-24 22:14:21 · answer #6 · answered by lidlolady 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Develop your own self first and then you will be more confident in dealings with the opposite sex. Go to school and really become expert in something. This will give you a lot of confidence and make you feel better about yourself.
No easy fixes--just work on yourself
Good luck
2006-09-24 22:29:59 · answer #7 · answered by Michael D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, you need some interests other than men. And everybody feels that way sometimes. but if you can't function, ya you have a problem. Maybe some couseling.
2006-09-24 22:34:18 · answer #8 · answered by rere 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do have a problem and you are looking for another person to make you feel good about yourself...to validate you. You sound depressed to me and would do well to talk to a doctor about your symptoms. You need to like yourself and feel good in your own company.
2006-09-24 23:20:21 · answer #9 · answered by tigerlily_catmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the reason why some people "love" another person and can't live without them is because they don't know how to make themselves happy. Find out what makes you happy and don't rely on someone else to do it for you.
2006-09-24 22:32:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋