i was hooking up with this guy and it turns out he was just using me for sex.i got pregnant and 3 months later he got another girl pregnent.hes still with that girl and hes trying to get rights to see my son. i dont like his girlfriend and i dont want my son around her so i never let his dad see him unless he comes to my house and she doesnt let him come over so he never sees his son. what are the chances the coutrs will give him rights?is there anything i can do so my son is never in the same room as har?
2006-09-24 13:10:56 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
do you think he has a good chance of getting rights if he takes it to court?
2006-09-24 13:15:30 · update #1
he wasnt really using me we would just hook up at parties when we saw eachother i knew we didnt really have anything between us but sex
2006-09-24 13:20:51 · update #2
What you're doing is really immature. Just because you don't like his girlfriend , you won't let him see his son? Grow up. Your son deserves to have both of his parents in his life. He didn't ask to be born. There's not much you can do to keep his girlfriend from being around your son unless she's violent. So odds are you're going to have to get used to the fact that she's going to be a part of his life.
Also don't forget that she has/will be having your sons little brother or sister. He deserves to have a bond with them too.
It's time you stop putting your pride ahead of your son. To me, it seems you hate this other women more than you love your son if this is how you're going to act. It's not fair to use him as a weapon to get your own way. So stop it before you do emotional damage to him.
Legally since you weren't married he'll have to petition the court for visitation, he will be awarded visitation based on his (the childs) age. As he gets older he will be able to spend more time with his father. The baby isn't yours alone. He's a part of BOTH of you. Your ex has a right, legally and morally, to see his son.
2006-09-24 13:20:36 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would assume that he has every legal right to see his child, unless of course you can prove that he's been abusive in the past. A judge would look at it differently then. Has the new girlfriend been mean or abusive to your son? If not, I'm not sure if there's much you can do. Why exactly do you not like her? If it's purely because she's with your baby's father, that's not really a good argument for you not wanting your son to be in the same room with her, at least from a legal stand point. Basically, if you were to go to a judge and say "I want my son to see his father, but I don't want my son in the same room with his father's new girlfriend because I don't like her", the judge is going to ask you what the problem is. Sorry to say, unless you can prove some form of abuse, be it through the girlfriend or your ex, I'm not sure there's much you can do as far as being able to have your ex not see his son. Even if they gave you custody he could possibly still get visitation rights. Again, it all depends on any possible underlying situations you haven't shared.
To Add: First you said he just used you for sex, then you said you knew it was just sex that you had between you and nothing more. You made it sound like he was the bad guy by using you, but you knew what was going on, Sounds like you're just as bad as he is. Keep it in your pants if you can't deal with potential consequences.
2006-09-24 13:18:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
OK so you don't like her, because of that you are punishing your baby, not the father but the baby
girl if you want custody of your child you better not tell the judge that you don't like the girlfriend
be an adult and let that child see his father
you can refuse only if you think that he or she will hurt him
as o f now you don't have that excuse
do you know how many man out there that have babies and don't want to take of them, this one does so give him a chance
but your feeling aside for your baby
Good Luck , Keep Strong
By the way Necat is correct moving away that is one way of dealing with this
2006-09-24 13:24:33 · answer #3 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ooohhh that's a touchy one. Why don't you like the girlfriend? Is the father and his girlfriend fit (by law) to spend time with the child?
The courts are going to look at those things. Like what kind of environment your son would be exposed to. If the father wouldn't pose a threat to the child, the courts may allow him visitation.
Good Luck.
2006-09-24 13:15:16 · answer #4 · answered by curious51867 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a real jerk!! He must not care to much about seeing his son, just because she won't let him come over to your house! As far as the court goes there is probably nothing you can do to keep him from having visitation with your son, unless you can prove it wouldnt be in your sons best intrest.
Good Luck
2006-09-24 13:16:02 · answer #5 · answered by ?rukkaloca24? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not punish your child because your child's father is a less than stellar human being. Unless she is abusive to your child, I would not let that be an issue. And yes, unless he is unfit, he will get visitation, partial custody, etc....I don't mean to sound mean, but it seems as if you are using your son as a weapon against his father. If that is the case, you are the one who will pay the price in the end. I also think you are basing your decisions on jealousy, not the best interest of your child.
2006-09-24 13:16:40 · answer #6 · answered by Vee 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why do so many women allow themselves to get into these jams? You said yourself you knew it was only hooking up for meaningless sex. Why didn't you take better precautions and protect yourself? Wouldn't you rather conceive a child with a reliable, honorable, mature man who will step up to the plate of fatherhood? Choose better men. Make better choices. And start soon so you can raise that child to have better judgement, too.
2006-09-24 13:31:59 · answer #7 · answered by DivaDynamite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope. Courts dont care who you like. If he get rights he can take the son home with him. I doubt he will fight too hard since he isnt too into you either. He might just be yankin your chain. Act like you don't care and you want him to come around and pay child support and give you the weekend off. He'll run like a scared rabbit. m
2006-09-24 13:15:43 · answer #8 · answered by Mache 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first let me say i am a single dad with custody. The courts will allow the father visitation of the child. If you can prove his girlfriend is not treatting the child right( not beatting himETC) Then you may get his rights modified. Basically you can do nothing..
2006-09-24 13:16:26 · answer #9 · answered by richard a 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you where not married, he has no rights unless you give them to him by getting support. I understand that your mad at him, but, he got you pregnant, so it is only right he be made to support the child. You can, however, get supervised visitation, that way he can only come there to see him/her, and he is not allowed to bring her. Another point, you sound young, If you are under 17 and he is over 18, Most states will charge him with rape, even if you don't want to, if you apply for state aid. I would talk to a lawyer no matter what. They will give you the best advice. Good luck from a single dad raising my boys myself. (their mom is worthless too)
2006-09-24 13:18:17 · answer #10 · answered by Common Sense 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋