My ex has just called me for the 5th time in the last 6 months after his weekend with the kids is up with excuses why he can't drive the 40 miles to bring them home like he's supposed to. The divorce clearly states that transportation is to be provided by the defendant, which is him. He is a scum, has had several oui's in the last couple years and has spent more time in jail than he has with his kids. He's in the process of attempting to get residency changed along with his child support payments (which is all he's concerned with, $$$) and just being a threatening jerk. Should I have the county Sheriff meet me at his house if I have to get the kids myself tonight? I feel like if I don't have a "witness" there he could get nasty and even violent. Opinions????
2006-09-24 11:38:46 · 23 answers · asked by Amangela 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I did have the sheriff meet me there, thank god. He even tried to start crap with him standing behind me, but it's less than if I hadn't had him there. He all but had my oldest who is 13 convinced that he wanted to stay there and wasn't going to let him talk to me... but the cop standing there convinced him to "allow" it. What a piece of work. I am filing my own motion to modify his visitation and child support along with a motion for contempt. He needs to be stopped. I wish I could get a protection order against him, I fear that he may try to kidnap the kids, but unless I have proof that he might it won't fly with the courts here.
2006-09-25 00:22:34 · update #1
don`t go alone .. I think this is obvious
2006-09-24 11:44:09 · answer #1 · answered by Ayman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, call the Sheriff and take a copy of your court order with you to prove that he indeed is obligated to provide transportation.
Next to this childsupport thing: if he is trying to get residency in another county because of the child support you need to find out from the cops what you can do about that---however, I can tell you already this much: UNLESS YOU LIVE IN SOUTH CAROLINA WHERE WAGES CANNOT BE GARNISHED, should you be able to have the courts garnish his wages for child support. It works differently in each state, so call the family court to find out how you can make sure that he pays---and also request a protection order, because if he drinks it will not be a very safe environment for the children...Good Luck
2006-09-24 18:46:56 · answer #2 · answered by What Will The Spill Kill? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I would definitely call the sheriff and explain the situation and be prepared to have your divorce decree in hand so they know what your rights are....then, go there with the sheriff's deputy and get your children and then the first business day afterwards, I would go to the courts and request that your visitation policy be changed, and request only supervised visits for him in your own town..with a trusted adult who is not involved. State all your reasons for asking for such a change, and be prepared to have times and dates written down where you can prove your accusations.
But, above all, do not drag your children into the middle of this!! They are not a party to the actions between you and your ex-spouse, and should not be made to feel that they are in any way to blame for a feud between the two of you. That can carry through with them into their adult life, and do you really want to be responsible for what could happen in their lives?
Good luck, and I hope and pray that your children will sleep safe in their own beds at your home tonite.
2006-09-24 18:55:01 · answer #3 · answered by lildragonlexi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to agree with most of the others. I think you should have someone there with you, preferably an officer of the law. You certainly don't want any confrontations with him around your children. Give the local police station a call, explain the situation and that he has violated the ruling of the courts. Let them know that you are hoping there will not be any problems but that you would appreciate it if you could at least have a police cruiser visible when you arrive. Hopefully, they will accomodate you for the sake of the children.
2006-09-24 18:51:47 · answer #4 · answered by Gemma S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, by all means. Just explain the situation to the dispatcher when you call and tell them theres a good chance he will be hostile and you fear for yourself and children. Contact the courts ans ask for supervised visitation for him as your afraid something will happen. He should have lost his drivers license somewhere along here so that will help younout but go get your kids and good luck. Please feel free to email me back if you need some advice or if I can help
2006-09-24 18:51:01 · answer #5 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, do it and have it documented every time you have to pick the children up - then take it back to court. I would say refuse him seeing the children but the court, sadly, would see you wrong in that case. He's trying to make you mad, hurt you, financially. Just play fair on your end. Every single time have a sheriff meet you to file a report that is filed in the court house and is on paper.
God Bless.
2006-09-24 18:58:29 · answer #6 · answered by skevans 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you must think of the children.How will they react to the present of police officers maybe taking dad to jail.If they don't have school then I say wait till he can find tranportation for them home.If they have school then my advise is to take someone with you..The police should always be the last to call...Remember your children see all of this....Good luck Wait a minute..I see everyone saying call the cops..NOT!!!!!!!! Cops are not the answer...They will make it better for a short while but then you have to deal with the after affects on the children.Try to get along with the father..It will be the best thing you could do for your children.
2006-09-24 18:46:56 · answer #7 · answered by sweet_thing_kay04 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if you can get a police escort that would be great. It might be hard to convince the police to send an officer if there is not an immenent crime. You might need to get a couple friends to go with you.
Also, if you are plagued by a hostile threat, you should not take the passive soft approach...that's all I will say on that topic.
2006-09-24 18:44:24 · answer #8 · answered by martin h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not do this alone. You need someone with you in case things turn violent. If not the sheriff, get someone. If no one is available, meet him at McDonald's or a public place. Always air on the side of safety.
2006-09-24 18:41:16 · answer #9 · answered by Yoda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would definately have someone with you and if you really feel unsafe it never hurts to have law enforcement with you. Why don't you both meet half-way at a designated place where there are plenty of people around for future visitations. That would help both of you out and probably be a lot safer situation.
2006-09-24 18:47:48 · answer #10 · answered by bigmossy077 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have proof with you i'm sure you could get a sheriff to go with you but if you cant get a cop to go with have a friend go with you and take a video recorder and record the whole encounter so if he does do something stupided to violate his court order take him to court and get his privilages restricted
2006-09-24 18:44:25 · answer #11 · answered by tlalteutli 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋