I've been seeing a guy younger than me for months now. We agreed while the chemestry is great between us a full on relationship would not work. The trouble is I have fallen for him. One part of me wants to walk away and stop fooling myself and part of me wants to hold on to what we've got for as long as possible even though I know i will eventually get hurt. He is 24 I am 32. He wants to go to Australia next year for a year and feels with my comitments morgage etc that it would be too complicated. He says he only wants fun but sometimes it seems he is fighting true feelings. Someone please tell me of a pill I can take to forget him
2006-09-24 09:11:04 · 22 answers · asked by Bettyboo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's tough to end an otherwise good relationship but you've got to end this one in order to find Mr. Right. You've said yourself that there is no future here so why drag it out? If he does truly love you he'll let you go or make a more serious attempt to try and find a way to make your relationship work on a permanent basis.
2006-09-24 09:15:50 · answer #1 · answered by janisko 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's always hard to end a relationship but you know in you heart of hearts this is going nowhere and that it will end with you being hurt but at least you know where you stand with him, he has already told you that he doesn't want to get committed to you and that he intends to go to Australia for a year. I think also the age gap maybe concerning him even though you haven't mentioned that and that's why he is treating this as a bit of fun. Break it off now and it will make it easier, do it on your terms if you can at least then you can get out there when you feel ready and find that someone that you are destined to be with rather than clinging onto a false hope that when he gets back that you will resume where you left off as you know that it just won't happen. Good luck.
2006-09-24 16:27:45 · answer #2 · answered by GaryUKB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You should walk away. Can you? I have been there. Not as easily said then done. It's a f$%cking sh!tty place to be. It can waste your life away and sometimes you need a situation, like his leaving to Australia, to break it for you so you have a chance to find something better for yourself. I know it won't feel like it now, but one day you will look back with sadness and anger at how you allowed yourself to feel that much pain for the sake of love. Real love will care for you and make you feel great. It may only be available for you when he is out of the picture.
What answers you get here won't help a lot. Your brain pulls you one way and your heart the other. The heart often wins the tug of war and then it breaks a little more each time. You don't want the pain, but the total loss seems worse right now.
I sooo feel for you and wish you the same good fortune I had to get out of that situation. I am 41, he was 28. I am glad its over. Good luck to you. Email me if you want any support.
2006-09-24 16:27:19 · answer #3 · answered by Jacqueline 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no pill and no cure.....I would enjoy it and take the risk---the fact that he was talking about the complicated mortgage thing of yours is an indication that he does think more than sex, but then the fact that he is going to Australia is making things difficult. I'm sorry, but there is never good advice for this kind of situation because no matter what you decide, you will feel hurt in the end....
2006-09-24 16:17:18 · answer #4 · answered by MARIANNE G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No pill sorry...and the age difference isn't so great that it need be an issue, unless y'all make it one...bottom line though if you knew from the get go that he wanted to relocate, and you weren't at liberty to do so (with him) then why'd you get involved?
Part of becoming involved with people is risk of being hurt emotionally...of allowing ourselves to feel pain when the situation doesn't go as we desire...
Enjoy it for what it is until he leaves, and then cherish the memory of a good time with someone you really dug, and move on...make it a pleasant and positive experience to have had, not one with regrets...
2006-09-24 16:14:30 · answer #5 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love affairs like that is tough. Especially the more one stays around someone the more a persons gets attached.
My suggestion is to cut back on seeing him; perhaps. Don't quit seeing him, but being open to other friendships could help.
And believe it or not seeing a good psychologist or qualified counselor could help you get through the feelings, and thoughts on what to do.
I hope for the best for you through this.
From:
A Man Of Faith
2006-09-24 16:19:09 · answer #6 · answered by Flathead B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the relationship for what it is and go with it. He may be unaware of your true feelings and maybe if you tell him, then he would feel confident to open up as well about how deep his feelings truly are for you. If he doesn't reciprocate the same feelings, try to keep yours in check and enjoy the time you have left with him.
2006-09-24 16:18:58 · answer #7 · answered by spitonapit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it looks like he wont commit to you and has made it clear. If you walk away now and he comes running then you will know how he truly feels about you. If he doesnt chase you then you have to move on with your life and forget him.
Dont worry about the age gap if you decide to make a go of things
2006-09-24 16:15:15 · answer #8 · answered by jess w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is telling you, that he wants to walk away. The age is the major factor. So try to forget him and search the ocean for a new sea trout. He doesn't want commitment right now.
2006-09-24 16:15:10 · answer #9 · answered by Norskeyenta 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a ''truth pill'' ... and stop lying 2 yourself. Or take a pill called ''another guy'' ... that should make you 4get him.
He probably wants to just have fun .. like he said, and the only one fighting with their feelings ..is you.
2006-09-24 16:16:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋