I was with someone for four years. Then she cheated with someone at my work. She left me to date him for three months and then came back, asking to try again. It was the worst time of my life, and now, even though we're trying, I still have so many bad memories - thoughts of them together and the lies. I want to make this work in the present, so how do I put the past out of my mind?
2006-09-24 08:08:07 · 9 answers · asked by ja3po 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You need to make sure that her behavior towards you is in check - does she really own the fact that she cheated on you and left you heartbroken? She should be on her best behavior at all times - being kind and patient and helping nuture the relationship at the pace YOU want it to go.
2006-09-24 08:18:28 · answer #1 · answered by rrmorris45 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I forgave my husband five years ago for cheating. He told me at the time that he was not happy but then he realized it was me he wanted and we began to work things out. Six months ago he started saying the same thing - I am not happy. I found out he was having an affiar with a co-worker. We are now divorced.
You need to figure out why she cheated in the first place before you can move on. If she cheated once there is a very good chance she will do it again. If you are having so much difficulty forgetting everthing that happened maybe you need to ask yourself if she is truly what you want.
You deserve better.
2006-09-24 08:19:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well people change if u can wait because it might take time.If u cant get over the past and move on maybe u want.If u cant trust then u have nothing.I been there before and I got over it because no one is perfect.The only thing I couldn't see working threw is my spouse having a baby with someone.If u love her then u should believe u can work out anything because love will always win if that's what it is.
2006-09-24 08:17:20 · answer #3 · answered by ray ray 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married to my husband for 5 years total, 3 years into our marriage he cheated on me. I tried to forgive him and thought that I had, but then he left for Basic Training and while he was gone, I realized how much happier I was without him, without the worry that he would do it with her again. He works with her and it was so hard to trust him. I divorced him and I am much happier. I feel that even if you want to forgive, you cant forget.
2006-09-24 08:16:28 · answer #4 · answered by elastagirl27 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every guy I've ever dated (excluding my husband) has cheated on me, and NOT ONCE did I stay or go back to them. Why? Well, because I respect myself more than that, and knew that if I did stay with them it would be me constantly wondering where they are, who they're with, etc. Life's too short to live like that. I forgave them, but didn't feel the need to relive it all.
2006-09-24 08:21:33 · answer #5 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget it bro, those who dont learn from the past are doomed to repeat it. She only came back to you because it didnt work out with the other guy, so she's using you to keep herself with someone until the next "big" thing comes by. Dump her, its not worth the stress
2006-09-24 08:20:12 · answer #6 · answered by You_dumb_bastard 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no one saidyou have to trust her again atleast not yet but you can forgive her if you want to try and make the relationship work if you love her give her another chance dont hold her cheating over her head if you are going to forgive her dont bring her cheating up in future fights or then its not worth trying to get back together again it depends if you love her or you think she really loves her
2006-09-24 08:13:22 · answer #7 · answered by jerry k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude if you can't you can't, don't force it either because you'll only drive yourself crazy with worry or concern whether she'll do it again.
2006-09-24 08:14:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would NEVER!! histrory always repeats itself!!
2006-09-24 08:10:10 · answer #9 · answered by LIZARD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋