my boyfriend and i have fights about the same thing every day him not cleaning after himself. how do i get him to realize that. that is his reponsibility not mine.
2006-09-24 07:26:11 · 14 answers · asked by chalebori 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Oh boy, oh boy....trust me, I have learned the hard way about this one! You can't get anyone to do anything that they don't want to do. At my house, I do the vast majority of the cleaning, because I'm the neat one who wants it clean. My boyfriend will occasionaly (once a week or so) do the dishes, and that's all I ask of him. In our bedroom, he really doesn't want to pick up his clothes, so we compromised on his clothing being confined to two laundry baskets and a pile on the floor, and he knows that if the dog chews up anything of his while she's sleeping with us, then he's to blame.
Either he will compromise, or you will have to accept that the majority of the household duties will fall on your shoulders. If he loves you and understands that it's important that the house stay clean, you should be able to get him to pick up his dirty socks and rinse out his dishes, but that's about it.
Hope this helps!
2006-09-24 07:31:47 · answer #1 · answered by rita_alabama 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All I can say is that I once had a boyfriend that was the same way. Yes I am sorry to say it didn't work out but this wasn't the reason why. Anyway, he was messy and to top things off I have two boys of ny own already which in my book I consider as men too. One thing I did learn was of ideas on how to make things easier for them. For example, I organized and made things easier for them to put up. Like I made a basket specifically made for white clothes, things like that etc.... It worked for awhile but it was back to the same thing. Always getting mad because I would come home from work to a mess. After awhile I just didn't say anything and started showing that I just didn't care anymore. You can try the silent treatment the but personally I don't think things end well with this treatment. My best advice to you is that you and your partner need to sit down and talk to where you both can work something out that would satisfy the both of yall. You know 50, 50. Best luck to you and don't let something like this ruin a relationship only you know is worth keeping.
2006-09-24 14:59:20 · answer #2 · answered by apgiggles27 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had the same problem...now I come home from work and the kitchen is clean and the whole house is straightened up.
I got so fed up with it that I stopped doing the things I did for him. In my opinion if he wanted me to do things for him (ie: his laundry) then he should have to help me keep the house remotely clean. I didn't expect him to polish the silver every evening while watching football. But it never killed anyone to pickup their dirty clothes and put them in the laundry room which is 5 feet away.
I admit, it took him a few days to realize my point, but when we went to get his favorite work shirt out of the closet and it wasn't there and I said "sorry honey, I didn't have time to do the laundry...I was too busy cleaning the kitchen and picking up your clothes off the floor" he suddenly realized my point and has completely changed.
2006-09-24 14:38:03 · answer #3 · answered by lsulli2004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good luck with this one.
I have been with the same man for six years and he just wont clean up after himself. I have to stay on his *** about this. Just keep telling him that i can't do it all. That i work and he works and it isn't fair tha i have to clean and cook too. So we take turns cookking.
But then again i really don't wan thim to tclean because he does a half *** job anyways. But as far as picking up after him self...lol! He is a lazy *** and always will be.
2006-09-24 14:28:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What I did was go on strike. I changed the sheets on my side of the bed, and pushed them to the center, and left his side with the dirty ones on it. Yes there was a great big lump in the middle of the bed, but oh well. Then when he wanted dinner I had only cooked enough for myself, and when I did the laundry, I only did mine. When he left his stuff laying all over I just pushed it to a big pile in front of his chair in the front room. This went on for 2 weeks, until I came home from work one day and he had picked up all of his stuff, made the whole bed, washed his clothes. We Never had another problem.
I told him if he wanted a mother to pick up after him and take care of him, then move back home with her.
Good Luck and I hope that this works for you, it sure did the trick for me.
God Bless
2006-09-24 14:32:20 · answer #5 · answered by cinson1999 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
most men are slobs.. thats just the way it is. You can't really force him to do it.. but if it's totally unbearable, move out. he just might not be ready to have someone nagging at him to clean..
2006-09-24 14:30:25 · answer #6 · answered by ashwee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, you shouldn't live with a messy partner. if he loves you, he will clean and if he doesn't, then find somene else who will. Messy men are completely undesirable.
2006-09-24 14:28:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
throw a tantrum if he sees u cleaning up after him then he aint gonna do it
2006-09-24 14:30:27 · answer #8 · answered by Tish Tish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to drill it in to his head that his mother doesnt live there .over and over . til he gets it.
and this aint burger king he doesnt get it his way .and if nothing changes jus leave it there forever if its not yours dont bother something got to change
2006-09-24 14:32:22 · answer #9 · answered by PETE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will realize that as soon as you move out.
2006-09-24 14:51:28 · answer #10 · answered by tooyoung2bagrannybabe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋