my girlfriend got rapped by a homeless guy when she was 15. Where both 16 now and whenever i go to touch her she tells me to stop a few seconds after she just told me it was okay. Why is she doing this? She wont trust me with anything and she's constantly studying me and waiting for me to mess something up. I dont push her to do anything physical i always let her decide. I am a guy and i do want some action and I want a girlfriend not a friend.
2006-09-23 16:01:56 · 20 answers · asked by mattman70 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
first off your still young and second give her some space she was traumatized for life
2006-09-23 16:04:58 · answer #1 · answered by milkmaider2000 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You're 16 - you don't NEED any action for pete sake. Learn patience and self control - and empathy. Your girlfriend was RAPED, not rapped. That is a life altering event in the life of women twice her age. She lost not only her virginity but her innocence and any sense of self assuredness or security she ever had. She didn't choose what happened to her - her life was shattered, and she still gets to worry about developing HIV.
Back off! She doesn't need some pubescent guy pawing all over her, trying to get her to do something she doesn't want or isn't ready to do.
2006-09-23 16:13:24 · answer #2 · answered by kids and cats 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok, when a womans in the poaition ur g/f is, its hard on both of you. She is treatin you this way because she has lost trust in people in general, not just you. She'll come around eventually, but wont say when. This has to take its time. Remember, time heals all woudns.
Just be there for her and be her friend. Try to ignore all your urges if you can. Its gonna be hard, but if you love each other it will be well worth the wait.
2006-09-23 16:36:37 · answer #3 · answered by jason l 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember the first thing you said in your question!!! You said she was rapped. She is always going to have problems that are going to be there. Be understanding to her feelings and her needs. If you need to have some "action", do the responsible thing and find a girl who is willing to have no self respect. If your were my son, I would knock you right up side the head after asking a question like this.
She was violated in a very humiliating and disrespectful way, and she needs someone who is understanding and loving. Not a jerk who wants "action" to satisfy his own needs, she already had that when she was rapped.
2006-09-23 16:09:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
" I am a guy and i do want some action and I want a girlfriend not a friend."
What do you think of when you think of boyfriend and girlfriends? Just physical stuff, or do words like 'patience' 'love' 'understanding' and 'put others before yourself' come to mind too? I'm not trying to be rude or make you mad, really, but it seems to me like you're only thinking about yourself. Consider her feelings! She was raped...can you imagine how devestating that would be? I'm surprised she even has a boyfriend so soon after that happened. Please, consider her feelings and put her first. Maybe it would help her to talk about it. I don't know...
The best of luck to both of you!
2006-09-23 16:55:37 · answer #5 · answered by Charly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude , i'm a guy and this has were given to be the most ****** question I have ever examine. She desires her area immediately because she did not ask for what got here about. They took some thing from her , and it is going to take a lengthy time period for her to discover it. i truly doubt you 2 are in love. and per chance immediately all she desires is a pal. in case you won't be able to be merely pals you should merely section strategies. once you get slightly older than per chance you'll waiting for a relationship, because immediately you're not any further.
2016-11-23 18:24:04 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has gone through a very traumatic event. She is only 16. Many 16 year olds are not ready for sex regardless. I think if you push her your a real jerk and if you cant handle waiting for her, you probably do not love her. Why would you want to push her into something she is not ready for just because you have hormonal urges?
2006-09-23 16:08:01 · answer #7 · answered by sweet cheeks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is doing this because she was raped!!!! Instead of trying to get some try and get her to talk to a professional about this. If you really need some that bad then leave her alone because you aren't ready for a real relationship and all of the things that go with one.
2006-09-23 16:05:16 · answer #8 · answered by slanteyedkat 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She may not be ready for some time...so you had better have a LOT of patience....And are you really ready to be a daddy? Got a good job? Lots of money and good health insurance.I sure hope so
2006-09-23 16:07:00 · answer #9 · answered by MC 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just leave her alone dont be mad she isnt mad at you its just i guess when you start to touch her shes fine but then she starts remembering what happened just give her sometime just be there for here and tell that if she ever needs to talk that your always there for her then she will start to feel more comfortable and and then maybe shell let you but just give her some time good luck!
2006-09-23 16:08:01 · answer #10 · answered by darlingcuttiehottie 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first off your girlfriend was raped !!! OK this will take some time to get over some as traumatizing as that she needs to talk to a counselor she need space and you need to quit thinking of your needs and think of hers she needs a friend not a lover right now
2006-09-23 16:07:38 · answer #11 · answered by ladyluck356 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋