2006-09-23 02:03:24 · 24 answers · asked by Melfina M 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
His wife should be his penpal.
2006-09-23 02:16:07 · answer #1 · answered by TigerLilly 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Seeking a penpal in itself does'nt mean anything's wrong. If he specifies a single girl, above the age of consent, I'd be worried. Some school, and private groups, or programs will arrainge penpals for servicemen. Some do so for education, others are set up by folks who want to provide moral support for our soldiers. Veterans for one, understand how powerful and effect morale has on a soldier. Writing to, and hearing from a kid who cares enough to write, and encourage has an incredible way of boosting one's spirits. He may simply be participating in one of these programs.
2006-09-24 10:55:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's a female penpal, then yes something is rotten in Denmark (or terrible in Thailand).
I was married and deployed for 6 months (that turned into 12 months)... my writing time was reserved for letters to my wife.
Work occupied about 16 hours, sleep & meals 8 hours... the few minutes free were spent cranking out 2-3 pages home.
But never assume (because it makes an A@@ of U & ME), ask the husband... and if he starts to dodge... he's being a shifty lil perv.
2006-09-23 02:42:56 · answer #3 · answered by mariner31 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's just a penpal. Some people are social butterflies, others find it much easier to develop a friendship with someone whom they may never meet. It's completely innocent, until he starts taking long trips to go see this person...more than likely, there's nothing wrong. If you feel as if something's up, the best thing to do is talk to him about it and be sure to keep an open mind. Don't accuse, ASK.
2006-09-23 02:06:42 · answer #4 · answered by Shining Ray of Light 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd say it was normal. There are things that are easier to say to a complete stranger than a spouse.
Military wives, if you get offended by your husband not sharing EVERYTHING with you, then maybe he considers it for your own good, and you don't need to know. You're stressed being separated and alone already; do you really want to hear about every IED, every VBIED? I know I don't talk about who gets killed, who gets maimed, how close I come to getting that steel casket flight to Dover AFB with my significant other. I just don't do it, and sensibly enough I don't get asked on why not.
And not all penpals are females either. I've written mostly males in my spare time. I don't have time for single females who are interested in hooking up, and most military males actually don't. The guys who do have plenty of time for mischief are the guys who don't have endless patrols outside the wire and can pretty much camp out at the internet cafes. And military wives, your husband has FAR more opportunity to cheat on you with some Air Force or Navy girl running around on the FOB, or with a Filipina working for KBR, or one of the Arab interpreter girls, than some female back in CONUS who may or may not be using a fake picture anyhow.
Why simple penpal letter exchanges are such a flame-inducing issue is beyond me.
2006-09-23 08:00:16 · answer #5 · answered by Nat 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
MY thought is this...if the man is married, then he should be concentrating on his WIFE...and NOT developing a pen pal situation with a stranger.
My DH is in the Military and has been Deployed. He received letters thru this one Organization that came thru our home address. I would read each one and then passed them on to either my DH or the Chaplain. I also answered each letter personally thanking the person for taking time to write. Quite a few were single females....and by the 'tone' of their letter, it was obvious what they were looking for: snag a Military Man. Those letters were sent to the Chaplain to pass to the SINGLE Soldiers.
So what I would do is this......contact the person and let her know that you are his Partner....and don't appreciate the emails. And if your Partner gets pissed...oh well.
2006-09-23 02:45:39 · answer #6 · answered by BITE ME 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's normal, but be careful. There's a very very high divorce rate when returning from deployments or long cruises (depending on branch). Giving a serviceman something to look forward to in the event he's considering divorce could be contributing to his or her decision, and you could be getting yourself in deeper than you originally anticipated.
This doesn't mean this is always or even mostly the case. Being a pen pal for a serviceman can be very rewarding. They've got a touch time over there, and they need people to talk to.
2006-09-23 03:26:31 · answer #7 · answered by farfromfl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I assume this servicemember is away from home??? I don't think it is normal if the penpal is the opposite sex.It may start out innocent enough but something is up!!! For me any communication I recieve form my hubby who is deployed for another 10-11 months is precious-if he was talking to someone else on the net or writing to another I would be very upset-especially if he told me he was so busy etc..
2006-09-23 02:11:33 · answer #8 · answered by sleepy_girl 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think it is normal. It is always nice to have a pen pal to write to while you are in the military, this helps pass time and helps the soldier talk to others, besides their family. I think if the person gets deployed this will also give them someone else to write to. As long as the relationship between pen pals stays as pen pals then it is totally cool.
2006-09-26 02:16:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men are pigs whether they are in the service or not. They never say 'NO' to a woman...I am sorry, yes they will...its when she asks if they had enough. They are a combination of butt sniffing dogs and mud slathering pigs. God did not create them. Pen Pal is just a way of saying long distance f%$^ buddy. If you do find a decent guy he will not tell you how many skeletons are in his closet. I have 3 daughters and warn them constantly about guys. So far only one out of the many guys they have dated was a good guy. Do not trust them, they lie.
2006-09-23 02:17:43 · answer #10 · answered by mark_jw2008 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
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2016-12-15 12:53:50 · answer #11 · answered by kleid 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋