Okay. I'm so sick of people questioning my race after they see my mother. I am biracial. But, somehow I look more white. My mother is clearly black and my father is white. So I'm mixed. But I get so sad everytime I want my friends to meet my mom, they think its a joke just because I don't look mixed. And I'm tired of explaining myself when I don't know what to tell them! I have a strong relationship with my mom. I love her alot. People ask me if I was adopted, or whatever. And I get SOO angry! My mother says that its normal for them to think that. But I really hate it, and can't stand it.
This is me last year in June with my cousin (From my dads side.) [im the girl]
: http://i69.photobucket.com/albums/i41/NIKKIRD/938710072_l.jpg
But my question is how do I deal with this when it upsets me so much?
2006-09-22 21:56:45 · 11 answers · asked by Chrissy 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Community Service
Wear a tshirt saying - yes my mother is black, me dad white, but god forgot to stir me:)
this is only if u have a sense of humour mate
also i can see ur white but you do actually have some facial features common to black men-look at ur dad's face and then some proper white guy's face-u can see what i mean
2006-09-22 21:59:54 · answer #1 · answered by DarlaTremere 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sweetie,you didn't come out wrong You came out just how God wanted you to.
As far as people not understanding that you are biracial & that you are more "white" looking than "black" looking,maybe it's not a misunderstanding as much as it is a surprise to find out the you have a black mom when you look so white. Besides your REAL FRIENDS will either understand that your mother is black & your father is white or it just won't matter to them. Just be up front with them ~ let people know who you are, a beautiful biracial young women who has a black mother & a white father. This way when it comes time for them to meet your mother, there aren't any questions or surprises. Don't deny or be ashamed to let people know who & what you are. You're wonderful just the way you are so hold your head up high & be proud!!
2006-09-23 05:14:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm sorry to hear of you stress in this! you are a beautiful girl with a good head on her shoulders and you love and respect your family and that is all that truely matters. if your "friends" don't respect that you are bi-racial, or if they require an explaination then maybe they aren't true friends. when i've met my friends' parents and something seems off (like they are white looking and the mother is black) i don't ridicule them. i may question politely, such as: i don't mean to offend you, but i didn't know you were black? something like that i guess. or i'd be smart enough to look around the room for a family picture to see that dad is white therefore you have more of his traits. you know there are documented people throughout history that are in an al white family and suddenly one baby comes out black or vice versa.
i had a bf once that looked bi-racial and was the only one in his family that did....turns out his great great grandma was black back in the days of slave trading....so if that doesn't go to show it's odd how our genaology can come thru i don't know what does!
2006-09-23 05:09:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you didn't come out wrong. When I first met my husband I thought he was black, but when he took me home to meet his parents I realised that although his dad was black, his mother was white. I couldn't figure it out, and thought he was adopted.
It is a common reaction for mixed race people, so your mum was right.
It was a real education for me to realise there were far more mixed race people than I knew.
When my daughter was born everyone thought she would be dark, but apart from her eyes, she has always been quite pale. Her brother is slightly darker.
Everyone assumes my daughter is white, although she has an African name. Recently she went on a conference and had to stay in a hotel with a group of people who began saying racist things, assuming that she would agree with them- she was really upset that people could say things like that and reported them- they have since been reprimanded- so good for her!
You will educate people by the way you live your life- don't get angry, be proud of your parentage and of who you are- and try to dispel the myths with good humour as you go.
Good luck, and take care.
2006-09-23 05:08:40 · answer #4 · answered by loobyloo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People are ignorant about mixed marriages and their children (not just black and white) and you are not the only one. It is very sad.....Don't be angry be proud of who you are and when they see your mom give her the biggest hug and kiss on the cheek to let the world know she is your mom and you love her and you don't care what anyone thinks.....because this is true....When you all go out shopping dinner put your arm around her smile hold your head up be proud You know some people love to see the anger they provoke in others don't let them win Show you are better than they will ever be
2006-09-23 12:14:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The trick is to remember that we're all created as totally individual beings, whatever our parentage. Just remind youself of how many millions of people out there wish they were 'someone else'. Also remember that you need to allow for the ignorance of others. It may just be innocent ignorance from lack of education, but it's their issue not yours! Hopefully then your anger will subside. Be You, for you're unique!
2006-09-23 05:15:08 · answer #6 · answered by JENNY G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well y not just kinda bring it up casually before they meet your parents , so then they will know what to expect,
i wouldn't make a big deal out of it, u don't look mixed , but if u say u are then i guess u are
you are a very pretty girl, always be proud of where u came from,
2006-09-23 06:20:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way you answer to them is what really matters. Just answer them with a good smile. Thats it. Dont bother about others. Then your problem will be solved.
Have patience. Remember one thing.
"One of the greatest art of living is the art of forgiving". So Forgive all who have hurt you. ok now cheer up.
2006-09-23 05:13:56 · answer #8 · answered by Sonu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them to get f**ked! What business is it of theirs, and why do they care anyway? If they ask such questions, they are insensitive arsewipes, and don't deserve your friendship.
2006-09-23 06:54:12 · answer #9 · answered by Seph7 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
really it's not your problem it's their problem...you don't need to explain anything.
2006-09-23 05:50:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋