last year at a very close relative's funeral, my brother was completely and utterly drunk. after about 5 whisky's he becomes quite loveable saying he loves everyone. after the 6th, he becomes foul mouthed, a little aggressive and a complete embassment. it's my father's funeral next week and we all (especialy my mum) don't want a repeat performance. how can we stop him from going over the top?
2006-09-22 21:05:41 · 18 answers · asked by the knitter 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
after the funeral we are going to a hotel for food and to swop memories with other members of the family. there will be a bar there to buy drinks from.
2006-09-22 22:34:40 · update #1
First really sorry for your loss. What a nightmare to have to be worrying about his behaviour and cope with your own grief. Are you having the wake at the house or at a pub/hotel? If you are having it at the house it might be easier to monitor and diffuse any difficult situation that will arise. Have you tried speaking to him about this? Is there anyone who is willing to keep an eye on him on your behalf? I think whatever you do, if he is determined to drink and cause a scene, he will. It is so sad that if he does he will spoil what is essentially a special day for your dad, its HIS day and you need to quietly point this out to your brother prior to the funeral in the hope that you might get through...just hope it goes ok for you.
2006-09-22 22:06:22 · answer #1 · answered by widow_purple 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father must have some Male family members who may attend?....Get some of the Male family members to pay him a little visit or a phone call prior to the service, with a firm warning what the consequences will be if your brother decides to act disrespectful...If your brother does manage to get drunk at your fathers funeral, he has no class at all......immature, etc.!
2006-09-23 04:25:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is really no way to stop a drunk from drinking only to stop the drinks from the drunk if there is going to be drinking at the funeral make sure its only wine or something of that sort try to keep him close to the one person he respects the most and looks to for advice that way maybe he will turn to them instead of the bottle. losing a father is hard i know i lost mine 1 week befor i turned 18. i miss him as i will assume your brother misses his. dont turn your back on him now keep him close the problem may be bigger then what you think or something that you never thought at all. talk to him
2006-09-23 04:40:44 · answer #3 · answered by believer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he does get drunk at your Dads funeral he must have no respect for him or your Mum and I would get him round the corner and belt him. Your going to hope he doesn't show disrespect, because you cant stop him attending the service of his own Father so I hope it all turns out as it should do on this sad occasion. I send my condolence
2006-09-23 04:31:18 · answer #4 · answered by srracvuee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and get him early in the day and have something for him to do that is really physical and time consuming. Then at the funeral, hide all the liquor in the house, everywhere. Then get your brother in AA or the like.
2006-09-23 04:15:12 · answer #5 · answered by Just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him he can drown his sorrows after the funeral.Tell him he will show respect for his Father.Tell him the you and your Mother will not accept anything less.Remind him how stupid he was at the other funeral and he might feel some shame.I am sorry for your loss may God be with you and yours at this sad time.
2006-09-23 04:22:39 · answer #6 · answered by jean 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him and tell him that you do not want him disrespecting your father's memory and your mother after the funeral, he can do what he likes when its all over but you might have to read him the riot act over this one but he might not even do it as it is his father but you have to cover all your bases. As a last resort you might even have to ask the staff not to serve him drink but hopefully it won't come to that.
2006-09-23 07:02:50 · answer #7 · answered by GaryUKB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alert some large, male relatives or friends of the family to the potential problem and ask them to escort him out if his behaviour should deteriorate during the funeral.
2006-09-23 04:12:40 · answer #8 · answered by Liz 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't invite him.
The occasion ought to be remembered in future years as a memorial to your father not for the misbehaviours of family members.
2006-09-23 12:10:25 · answer #9 · answered by CeeVee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta sit down and talk to him about this, it's going to be a very sad time for all concerned and he will want to get drunk and 'drown his sorrows'. Just talk to him tell him how he makes you feel, you and ya mum and maybe he'll listen
take care
2006-09-23 04:08:57 · answer #10 · answered by Scatty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋