Christian-Catholic, dealing with sexuality?

Question

I am in college...there is a lot of temptation here. I can't even walk down the street without seeing something provocative. How do I deal with temptation and impure thoughts?

Answer 1

I'm not a Catholic, but as a Hindu one method that is taught is to say a mantra (word, phrase, or prayer) and say it throughout the day while you walk, eat, etc. Have your mind focus on that. Catholicism has lots of beautiful prayers (some short and some long) that you can choose from to recite throughout your day. Whenever you get thoughts of temptation start reciting the prayer silently to yourself and try to get an image of God (Jesus) in your head. According to Hindu teachers (including Tantric teachers) this should help spiritualize your life and keep your mind focused on God.

Another suggestion would be to change how you look at the person. Instead of seeing them as a sexual being, see them as God (picture them as Jesus or Mother Mary). Treat them with respect (the same respect you give to honor Jesus and Mary) which surely you don't think sexually of them.

The two techniques work really well together. There is a Hindu saying about saying a mantra. It goes "Say the mantra until it says you." What it means is that you should say the prayer until you don't even have to consciously do it, it is just happening in your mind all the time. It takes some time but after the prayer/mantra (a mantra can be as simple as just saying the name of God "Jesus" over and over again, too). When saying it try to create a rhythm. "Jesus Jesus Jesus Jesus Jesus" or "Jeeessuuuss Jeeessuuuss Jeeessuuuss" or some other rhythm. Try to do it slowly. The goal isn't to see how many times you can say it or even how fast, it is to focus your mind on the name, word, phrase, or prayer and it's meaning to you (it's deep meaning). Contemplate it as you say it, meditate on it while you walk.

The idea is simple, in both exercises (which can be used together) the focus is shifted from all the many thoughts that arise in our minds to just focus on one thought, to keep our mind focused). When not walking, sitting, etc, but just in your room all alone, take time to just sit and do the word, name, phrase, prayer over and over again and to really work on focusing your mind on it. When thoughts appear in your mind simply acknowledge them, be aware of them and then as you continue to say the mantra just let the thought fade away. Be aware, consciously aware, of what is happening in your mind. The thoughts that rise up, etc. Buddhist often call the mind "the monkey mind" because it tends to jump from thought to thought to thought to thought. This is all very similar to what Catholics call contemplative prayer (I believe that's the terminology they use). Catholics, Orthodox Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, Jains, and Taoists all share this type of practice of focusing the mind and working to live more consciously, more aware.

It worked well for me. If it doesn't work try a different word, name, phrase, or prayer. Try it for atleast 30 days. If the first time doesn't work make a change (different word, name, phrase, prayer) and try again for 30 days. Don't worry if you change the rhythm from time to time. It's okay to change the rhythm and have fun with it. Afterall that's what you're focusing your mind on and if making it like a song or changing the rhythm from time to time helps, then by all means do so. Hindus, Buddhists, and Catholics do have one thing in common with prayers and that is they are usually done to various rhythms and tones (they are, to put it simply, sung).

May God's love, peace, and strength be with you!

Answer 2

I being in college, know how you feel. Luckily I am engaged so it is easier to deal with this. However, before I was engaged, I expierienced some of the same things.

The fact is, it's extreamly hard to block most out those thoughts and Impossible to block out all of them. After all, we are human. Don't fret though, God understands this and is with us. It is not about impure thoughts alone, its about acting on those impure thoughts. Try adding it to your morning prayer's before you start the day. Also, let it pass you by. How, literally imagine it like a boat in the water, you see it, acknowlege it, then move on in your mind to something else. Having impure thoughts is not a sin. Just keep your heart in the right place, keep God in mind, and you wont have to worry about acting on them.

Good luck and God Bless

Answer 3

Impure thoughts... temptation... if you are looking at gals and getting excited, that's nature. It's okay to appreciate the opposite sex (or the same one, for that matter!) and it is very understandable that your body reacts. Nature probably intended us to do most of our procreating in our late teens and twenties.

The key is what you do about it. I think the most important thing is to respect yourself and those who are affecting you (especially a partner). Be true to who you are. You are in control over yourself. Don't allow yourself to become a sex toy and don't treat anyone else like that.

A loving relationship is harder to come by than a one night stand, but having been there, done that (and yes, both during my college years), the loving relationship is worth the effort.

Answer 4

Let them come up, look at them, don't treat them as sinful or as 'impure' but just watch them come up and shrug your shoulders and say, with a little smile, there's another one! Don't make it into a big deal and they won't be a big deal. If you feel like engaging in some action that you'd regret, look at why you want to engage in it and weigh the options. Try not to let guilt and self-persecution enter into the whole assessment -- just focus on loving yourself and trying to see others in a loving way (as yourself). And never judge yourself or others if you or they decide to indulge in some sexual activity. Not saying you should but just saying that if u abstain and u then think you're morally correct and others are not, then it's not very loving.

Answer 5

That's a tough one, especially at college. What worked for me is just to look away and keep my thoughts on God. Think of the person as God's child, that helped get my mind refocused. I must have said the Lord's prayer 100,000 times walking between classes in college. That worked the best for me because it immediately got my mind off what I was looking at and into thinking and praying to God. I can only tell you that, that was a big struggle for me too.
Just pray is all I can tell you.

Answer 6

Find Christian groups that meet on campus - get accountibilty partners.
I'm 37 now and still have that problem at times. God did not make any temptation so strong that we can not pass. I have testimonies if you want, just email me.




The Whole Armor of God
10A final word: Be strong with the Lord's mighty power. 11Put on all of God's armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the Devil. 12For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms.

Answer 7

Pray for strength to resist temptation. When you have an impure thought, pray for it to go away. Prayer is the only armor we have--use it.

Answer 8

Pray for strength, pray for purity of mind and heart.

God made you sexual for a purpose, but man has displayed these precious things for all to see around them all the time it seems.

I am not saying men and women should wrap themselves in shawls, but modesty is something that seems to have been forgotten in this day and age, making it much more difficult for men and women to keep their minds and hearts on God instead of earthly and fleshly desires.

This is temptation at its best and only by staying close to God in prayer and in reading his word will you be able to resist it.

If nothing else, God may be telling you to transfer to another school that allows less worldly influence and ecourages modesty in dress of both men and women.

Answer 9

Since most christian religions are fear and shame based. that is difficult to due as they are all natural GOD given feelings. just accept them for what they are thoughts . Everybody does a quick check over of those around them both for protection from danger and to look for possible mates.
you would be a fool not to acknowledge this fact and file it in its proper place.
It is also called self control. not acting on your impulses without some thought.
this only applies unless you are working to become a celibate priest.

Answer 10

initially and foremostly, God's reward to you for recognising that even with temptation and trial, as Christians we are to positioned God first and stay our lives through him. various brothers and sisters in Christ have revealed spectacular web pages for you, so i will not upload any others, yet i'd like to in worry-free words remark and furnish you with my complete help and reward. once you've a heart for God he received't tempt you previous your limits. Homosexuality is a sin like all different. some individuals have a organic inclination to mendacity, others to being violent. merely because we've desires, that isn't a reason to act upon them. keep praying. examine the note. persist with up on those links you've been given. and that i STRONGLY advise you get fascinated about an lively Church crew. Any Christian than would gladly love you, help you along with your situation, and doesn't decide you, yet quite help you stay through God. God bless.