Mary had a little lamb, her father shot it dead. Now Mary takes her lamb to school in two big chunks of bread.
2006-09-22 16:16:55 · 36 answers · asked by emergency_hammer 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
ohh, my god!!!
2006-09-22 16:18:44 · answer #1 · answered by Romina 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Mary had a little lamb,
She loved it tenderly
And people came from miles around
Her little lamb to see
But some grew jealous of that lamb
And nailed it to a tree
But that was not the end
For the lamb came back
And lives for eternity
2006-09-22 21:10:42 · answer #2 · answered by waycyber 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A fella from Southland related this sad tale to me:
life on the cattle ranch in the deep desolate desert of Austrailia is hard, lonely and boring. So when our gormet cook found a lamb tethered near the cookhouse, he rustled up his favorite dish.
But, no matter how good he thought the dish tasted, most of the lads sat sullenly. The rest seemed actively hostile.
The next day I summoned him into my office.
"Going to have to let you.go. Most of the boys are plum disgusted."
"Well, I can cook something else," the stunned chef answered.
"Yeah, and we'd a prefered if ye'd done so last night!"
"Mosta these boys ain't had a date for a year!"
2006-09-22 17:39:05 · answer #3 · answered by elge13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A yellow bird with a yellow bill,
Sat upon my window sill,
I coaxed it in with a loaf of bread,
And then I smashed it's fuc*ing head!
Or there once was a man from Nantucket, or
Here lies the bones of old screwy Dick!
Poor old guy was born with a corkscrew P*ick
He spent his life in the futile hunt,
To find the girl with the corkscrew cu*t,
He finally found her and dropped over dead,
Son of gun, she had a left hand thread.
I tried to clean this up as best I can. Hope you can read between the lines! Hope it don't offend you but you asked if anyone could beat this! I think I did, but hopefully you won't report me, remember, you asked! Take Care!
2006-09-22 16:32:21 · answer #4 · answered by basscatcher 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mary had a little lamb, it was a little runt. She tied it to a 5-bar gate and kicked it in the ....
Decency stops me from completing this line. but not starting it ;op
2006-09-22 17:33:55 · answer #5 · answered by Treat Infamy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mary had a little lamb, some mashed potatos and a slice of apple pie!
Hee Hee!
2006-09-22 16:22:42 · answer #6 · answered by mom of 3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Another cruel joke would be Mary had a little lamb, a little beef, and a little ham. Unfortunately I don't really think either joke is funny.
2006-09-22 16:20:22 · answer #7 · answered by Sazziable 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Mary had a little lamb,
the doctor was suprised.
But when Old McDonald had a farm,
the doctor almost died.
2006-09-22 16:20:51 · answer #8 · answered by Walking Man 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Mary had a little lamb
Full of fun and frolics
Tried to jump over a barbed wire fence
And ripped off both its ears
2006-09-22 18:58:53 · answer #9 · answered by Daddybear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mary had a little lamb and
The doctor fainted!
2006-09-22 16:18:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a problem for Jodie Foster and Sir Anthony Hopkins
2006-09-23 03:30:16 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋