Bible funnies:
Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married?
A. Ruthless.
Q. What do they call pastors in Germany?
A. German Shepherds.
Q. Who was the greatest Financier in the Bible?
A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.
Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.
Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in fury. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.
Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.
Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.
Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.
Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.
Q. Who is the greatest baby sitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.
Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.
Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck. (Groannn...)
PS... Did you know it's wrong for a woman to make coffee?
Yup, it's in the Bible. It says . . . "Hebrews"
2006-09-22 15:37:40 · 14 answers · asked by basscatcher 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I love it when people lighten up every once in awhile. Good jokes. I liked the one about eve and the apple.
2006-09-22 15:47:36 · answer #1 · answered by notthemamas1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok!
What is the fastest way to get word to as many as possable?
1 telephone
2 telegraph
3 tell a woman!
2006-09-23 00:23:50 · answer #2 · answered by Grandreal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Four nuns were standing in line at the gates of heaven.
Saint Peter asks the first if she has ever sinned. "Well, once I looked at a man's penis," she said. "Put some of this holy water on your eyes and you may enter heaven," Peter told her.
Peter then asked the second nun if she had ever sinned. "Well, once I held a man's penis," she replied. "Put your hand in this holy water and you may enter heaven," he said.
Just then the fourth nun pushed ahead of the third nun. Peter asked her, "Why did you push ahead in line?" She said, "Because I want to gargle before nun three sits in it!"
2006-09-22 22:50:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's good your said this was Christian jokes that way the Jews will Passover this one and go UNTO another.
2006-09-22 22:44:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nice ones. Q. What were Jesus' last words on the Cross? A. "Peter my dearest friend...I can see your house from here...
2006-09-22 22:56:14 · answer #5 · answered by canadastani 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what is a johova eye witness.?
a J.E.W.
what did the johva witness say to the centurian .when jesus was on the cross.?
a...centurina ...centurian i was the whole thing he ran out in front of the cross...
2006-09-22 22:45:27 · answer #6 · answered by Kingofreportedabuse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's the difference between an Israeli and and Israelite?
The Israelites have one-third fewer calories. :-)
2006-09-23 10:54:05 · answer #7 · answered by Pastor Chad from JesusFreak.com 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I liked Ruthless.
2006-09-22 22:44:50 · answer #8 · answered by RM 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
that was sooooo lame not cus im a christian and all but they were lame..... thats proof that christianity is no joke ok some of them were cute...
2006-09-22 22:43:25 · answer #9 · answered by Cassa B 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Cute, I'll pass them on!
2006-09-22 22:42:12 · answer #10 · answered by Tericka 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋