or find someone you didnt love but he was faithful?
Answer 1, 2, or 3?
i have been with my BF for 4 yrs, ilove him but he always cheats im scared if i leave him i wont find anyone else that would love me orthat i'd love, esp im 35 & who is going to want an old lady? i'm also afraid of being alone having to hear my friends complain how that are lonely and sexually fustrated all the time. I also have a friend who is with someone else she doesnt love and her x cheated but she is still unhappy wishing she were with him. i dont want to end up like any of my friends, or in the situation im in, so what do I do life has no gurantees what if im worse off and all alone forever or i do worse than him? pls help confused and lost. dont all men cheat anyways? i;m tired of finding womens numbers in his pockets.
2006-09-22 14:57:46 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
im not completely happy with him either cuz he cheats and he wont stop no matter how many times i cry and threaten to leave him, he just doesnt love me. but im not happy being without him either what do i do, he refuses to change.i'm stuck!
2006-09-22 15:00:32 · update #1
Be alone. Why would you wanna be with someone who cheats on you, love isn't suppose to hurt. And I wouldn't be with someone that is faithful but you didn't love cuz that's just setting you up for failure and who's to say you wouldn't cheat on that person cuz you have no feelings for them. You should be patient cuz one day you'll find the complete package, someone who is loving to you and who you love, someone who wants to be faithful to you and someone who'll treat you the way you've always wanted to be treated. Maybe now's the best time to take some time out and let mr right find you. You don't wanna be stuck with Mr Wrong and let him go by. Good Luck
2006-09-22 15:02:47 · answer #1 · answered by ♥Shortie♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ide rather be alone! You don't want an open relationship, so don't settle for one! (even if he's mr. dream boat or whatever- think about the time your wasting, you doof! do you really want to have children or a morgage with a gut less butt head like this!?) You sound pretty confused about yourself so you need sometime in the icebox before you go hunting again anyways! go get a job with mary kay cosmetics and cater to the inner woman, and find out what YOU want- not some goofy pole on the internet ! Good luck ans God Bless! (but seriously, Ican tell you've cried about this, so stop, take a step back and find a good positive girl friend that will bring your spirits up, and do positive things (now is NOT the time to start a new hobby like smoking....)
2006-09-22 15:05:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hear ya. Listen, you can't stay with a guy out of fear. So, you've been with him for 4 years...ok, would you like to be 40 and realize you still won't be married to him because he can't commit? Think about it. You think you're old now, but if you waste another minute on him, then that's another minute that you're getting older. I can see that you want out of this "relationship", but you're afraid to because you might not find someone else that would love you or vice versa. I've been there. Yes, been there big time. I was told that I was ugly, no one would want me. The dude pretty much had a mental control over me until I decided I had enough and I would rather live alone than be with someone who didn't care about me. Think about it, if you don't care about yourself, how can you expect someone else to do it? I started to care for myself. I went to see a counselor, and guess what else? I met the man that I'm about to marry within a month of breaking up with my loser ex-boyfriend. The new man in my life and I have been dating for 2 years, but love doesn't keep track of time. Last but not least, no, not all men cheat. There is hope. There are men. If this guy won't make you happy, another guy will. Have some self-confidence and see a counselor. Best of luck.
2006-09-22 15:09:52 · answer #3 · answered by Natalia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, 35 is not old ! Middle age is now 50. So stop putting yourself down. I would not stay with a JERK who was cheating on me.WHo obviosuly doens't love you or respect you or he would not cheat and lie to you about it. Why tie yourself to someone who is obviously shopping around for something "better". Life is too short to invest your time and energy into a situation and a man who is not worth the affort. There are no redo's in life and if you shackle yourself to this guy (who is NOT Mr. Right based upon how he treats you) than you miss out on the opportunity of meeting Mr. Right for Mr. Right now. You have no kids to tie you to him, be strong and move on..you do not have to settle for being treated like you are second best and you do not have to compromise yourself to a life less relationship out of fear of being alone. Let's say you live for 50 more years...a lot can happen in those years and there are men you have yet to meet because you are stuck where you are. Lif eis too short to be unhappy. There are no re-do's. And no penis is worth the loss of your self respect and diginity. No matter how well the guys uses it. Do you wnat to look back on your life and 50 years with regret over what you should have done but hadn't the courage to do it? Be strong. You can do and you will do.
2006-09-22 15:05:52 · answer #4 · answered by misfit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a relastion ship for 4 1/2 years and he cheated on my the whole time. I was like you I thought I wouldnt find anyone else. It was a hard dissision. I kicked him out. I started reading self help books to better myself and learned that I am worth a relationship that is honest. I think you would be better off without him. You will have a little pain now but that is better than the pain you have all the time knowing that he is cheating. I'm still looking for mr. right but I am happy and not suffering every day from the pain of him cheating on me. I am 37.
2006-09-22 15:04:01 · answer #5 · answered by Kelly M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm a married sahm, with 2 kids and pregnant so if i found out my husband was cheating my answer may be a little different.
if before we ever got married i found out he cheated on me and several times. i would most absolutely be done with him. it would be hard. but there are plenty of other men in the world. and plenty who would respect you enough not to do that. you deserve better than that.
not all men cheat, actually i think i know more women who cheat but that's beside the point.
BTW 40 is the new 30 so 30 is the new twenty, so really you are only like 25 and have your whole life ahead of you. hurray!
if you really want to stay with your boyfriend see if maybe he would look into counseling of some type. because that behavior is really not ok.
good luck to you hang in there!
2006-09-22 15:08:42 · answer #6 · answered by rachel5576 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is your problem? Why do women put up with this? Sometimes I just think women get what they deserve if they continue to say with a guy who they know is dirt. And no not all men cheat. But the guys who do not cheat seem to have a hard time finding a girlfriend and they see the guys who do cheat have women so they adopt that life style because it is successful. If women would stop f**King guys who cheat it would stop tomorrow.
2006-09-22 15:06:04 · answer #7 · answered by Carlos D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no point of being miserable all the time with somebody, specially if they are cheating on you. I'm sure you'll find somebody. My mom was married to my stepdad for 10 years and he always cheated on her. Finally she got sick of it and left him,and she found someone who is treating and loving her a lot better and she's 40.Not all men cheat, you have to look underneath rocks to find the good ones. Dont lower yourself thinking there's no hope for you because there is, and if you walk around showing that nobody would want to be with someone with low self esteem all the time. Respect yourself and people will respect you.
2006-09-22 15:04:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, all men don't cheat. I think you should break up with him, and move on. You are putting a huge drain on yourself, by being with a guy who is cheating on you. Also, those aren't your only three options. You could break up with this guy, and meet the man of your dreams. Who would be totally faithful. It seems hard now, to break up with him. But it is much better being single, and you'll feel better once you move on and get away from him. Your only 35, your not old, you can definitely still meet much more faithful guys.
2006-09-22 15:10:09 · answer #9 · answered by nicole 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl leave his *** alone and I mean run!!!!
You are way better than that we as woman when we have been with someone for a long time we start to believe he is all we know and just dont know how to leave.Trust I have been through it!!!One thing love is not and can never be is unsure! Thats not love...Love is giving someone the ability to hurt you but trusting them not to! So gurl cry a river build a bridge and get over it!!!
2006-09-28 05:05:32 · answer #10 · answered by MizModelMaterial 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋