I`d like a lil laugh,
hey it`s friday!
Can any 1 give me a really good CLEAN joke or riddle?
if so, 10 pts. will b waiting 4 u in u`r inbox!
2006-09-22 14:19:36 · 17 answers · asked by . 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
http://www.ahajokes.com/
http://www.danggoodjokes.com/
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Police.
Police who?
Police let us in; it's cold out here.
Knock Knock!
Doris.
Doris, who?
Doris locked, that's why I had to knock!
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
I love.
I love who?
I don't know, you tell me!
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Norma Lee.
Norma Lee who?
Normalee I don't go around knocking on doors, but do you want to buy a set of encyclopedias?
http://www.knock-knock-joke.com/knock_knock_001.htm
2006-09-22 14:32:44 · answer #1 · answered by Kappy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three friends check into a motel for the night and the clerk tells them the bill is $30, payable in advance. So, they each pay the clerk $10 and go to their room. A few minutes later, the clerk realizes he has made an error and overcharged the trio by $5. He asks the bellhop to return $5 to the 3 friends who had just checked in. The bellhop sees this as an opportunity to make $2 as he reasons that the three friends would have a tough time dividing $5 evenly among them; so he decides to tell them that the clerk made a mistake of only $3, giving a dollar back to each of the friends. He pockets the leftover $2 and goes home for the day! Now, each of the three friends gets a dollar back, thus they each paid $9 for the room which is a total of $27 for the night. We know the bellhop pocketed $2 and adding that to the $27, you get $29, not $30 which was originally spent. Where did the other dollar go????
2006-09-22 21:50:39 · answer #2 · answered by bones 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny.
So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!
One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?"
"My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
2006-09-22 21:44:18 · answer #3 · answered by Randy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three guys walk into the kings castle he says they must each go to the forest and collect 10 pieces of fruit. The first guy comes back with apples and the king says..."In order to live you must put all 10 up your butt without making any noise or facial expressions". The guy fits number one just fine but attempts number 2 and yelps in pain. The king kills him immediately. The second guy walks in with a handful of Berries, and the king says..."In order to live you must put all 10 up your butt without making any noise or facial expressions". So the guys begins, he makes it all the way to number ten and then laughs uncontrollably. The King kills him immediately. He ends up in heaven chatting to the guy with apples, and the first guy that had the apples says to him..." what happened, you were so close, you had berries why did you start laughing?" and the guy with the berries says .."I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming and he had pinnapples"
2006-09-22 22:40:18 · answer #4 · answered by neon49 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a head rolls into a bar, and asks the bartender to give him a drink. The bartender does, the head grows a body and is a full person. He is very happy being a person.. He asks for another drink, the bartender hesitates, but gives him another. The body dissappears and he is just a head again, the bartender says "you should've quit while you were a head!" hahaha
2006-09-22 21:34:29 · answer #5 · answered by daisy_may95 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there this one i read in cosmo, there was this taxi driver and it was his first day as a taxi driver so he picks up a passenger and drives off.after a while the passenger touches on his shoulder to get his attention and the driver suddenly loses control of the car.after sieving,he gains back control of the car.he pull over and tell the passenger ''i am sorry for the past 10 years i have been driving a hearse!
2006-09-22 22:16:50 · answer #6 · answered by bell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A man walks into a bar
OOOOWWWWW!!!!!
A pony goes to the doctor.
"What's wrong?" asks the doctor
"Oh, I'm a little horse"
Why did the Energizer bunny take so long in the bathroom?
Because he kept on going and going and going......
That's the best I could do
2006-09-22 22:01:24 · answer #7 · answered by cranky_gut 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A White horse DIDNT fall into the mud.lol
2006-09-22 22:43:40 · answer #8 · answered by i kissed a girl, and i liked it♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
woman walks into a bar carrying a duck
the bar tender said hey no pigs allowed
the woman said this is not a pig it's a duck
the bar tender said i know i was talking to the duck
2006-09-22 22:15:47 · answer #9 · answered by nakita 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did the chicken Run to the other side of the road?Try to run away from KFC.
2006-09-22 21:59:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋