I've been on this site for a while now, asking people to help me with my girlfriend and our various problems. I've had a lot of answers that have seriously helped, and, after everything, I realise I've changed for my girlfriend but she's just never going to change for me... Not that I want her too, but she's so darn stubborn that she's never going to admit wrong and thus, she'll never change anything on her part to solve a problem or argument.
So, my question is... since I'm in love with her (and I surely am, there's no doubt about it), do I just accept the fact I'm the one to change or do I get out of this relationship? She's so amazing, so wonderful and so "perfect" to me that I really can't imagine being without her, and just thinking about being apart kills me inside.
She's not nasty or anything, it's just... she's not going to change, even though I've talked to her about every problem I've had - it always come back to me and "I" have to make an effort to change.
Ideas?
2006-09-22 13:30:35 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i think that the reason you are inlove with her is because of the stuff that she does in the first place, u like to please her so when she does something and she dosent want to change and she gets mad u always go back to say sorry about it.. just imagine if u where to change her then everything will b boring. thats y you r withthe person u are with because that person is the person who keeps u going with the little things they do and if they didint have those things then u wont be that interested at all
2006-09-22 13:48:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The saying goes, that it takes two to make a relationship work. But you sound as if you can't part with this girl. If she really makes you happy then why want her to change. Nothing is that bad, or can't be worked out. I know this from being married 20 years! You will never agree with anyone, on everything. Therefor you deal with it and life goes on. You had more good things to say about her than bad, and let me tell you there is not one perfect person in this world, other than God. Hope this helped. Good luck
2006-09-22 13:39:14 · answer #2 · answered by Paulda37 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is very hard when you speak with such adoration to steer you away from your beloved. To have one in your life that you cherish is special. However, it seems that her unwilliness to meet you half way on any issue at all may grow old and become burdensome on you and on the relationship. It would be a wonderful gift that she could give you to bend a little and "own" her share of responsibility for possible bumps along the road. I hope she develops this relationship skill. T
his is the kind of flaw that may not seem like a big deal in the beginning but may really burden you and the relationship in time. Keep your heart a little protected, as your willingness to grow and change may make result in your outgrowing your partner.
2006-09-22 13:49:27 · answer #3 · answered by Serendipity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Meeting someone 100% compatible is impossible. The question is, the parts that you two are not compatible with, can you tolerate them?
She not going to change, and you will love again. So if it's in an area that you can not step back and give up, then I'd say lose her and find someone new.
But note that if you give in, she might dump you anyway. Some women don't like men that just back off. It's not enough "challenge" or whatever.
2006-09-22 13:36:20 · answer #4 · answered by evil_clown_of_destruction 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can never just change someone; they actually have to want to change. You also can not force someone to change. It must be in their hearts to do so. Also, if you change her, will she be the same person that you fell in love with? Maybe, maybe not........ The choice on whether or not you should continue to love her or not is completely yours. You must assess how you feel about her, and whether or not you can deal with her the way she is, and whether or not you are satisfied with sacrificing yourself for love.
2006-09-22 13:42:16 · answer #5 · answered by pilotmanitalia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bro what the *** r u talking about and stop being a wuss. u, as a male, dont need to change sh*t, stand ur ground and dont change urself just for some chick. if she doesnt like u the way u are then go get another girl, u put up with her sh*t so she can put up with a bit of urs
2006-09-22 13:36:08 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hhhmmmmmm. if youve seen rent then you might be in luck. if youve herd the song take me or leve me, then thats baisiccally wht yoiu should do. accept her for who she is if you really in love eith her. if she means the world to you. stay. if not. still stay untill you feel like you can find someone else. but take it slow if feel that things aren't working out. im stubborn. people live with me. like me boifriend. (not really we just go to movies as "friends"). if theres any other problems you can email me. swimmerg5soccer95yahoo.com
2006-09-22 13:45:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im in the same boat. my lady is trying to change how i feel about love/sex. i believe that sex and love are one and the same and she says that sex is not important just love so basically stand your ground and don't change its not worth it cuz if u do u will be changing for her the entire time ur together while she does nothing to change for u
2006-09-22 14:00:56 · answer #8 · answered by keithy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first i'm pretty sure this won't be ur first love so if she dosen't feel the same way about u as u do to her than let go, there will be other chances. hope this helps and good luck!
2006-09-22 13:45:03 · answer #9 · answered by Isabel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just accept her the way she is if you love her that much,but i don't think changing for someone will make you happy
2006-09-22 13:39:47 · answer #10 · answered by hunny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋