Why don't adults tell the truth about sex when talking to kids?

Question

I know a girl who is 10 years old and pregnant. This could have been prevented if only her parents had told her the truth about how babies are made.

Answer 1

Maybe young kids don't want to know. That doesn't mean that they shouldn't.
Kids that don't ask, will have sex anyway, uninformed.
You are right, that child's parents should feel absolutely horrible.
Parents need to make a point to mention sex without being asked. Especially since kids are doing it younger and younger.

Answer 2

I do tell my children( age 11,9,5) the truth but the real facts of the matter is the little girl would not have gotten pregnant if her parents were taking care of her the way a 10 year old should be????when would a 10 yr old be left alone with a boy(man) long enough to make baby..the poor child being brought into this world is not being given even a slight chance of normalcy...a 10 yr old girl shouldn't be even thinking about sex..you can tell your kids the truth without telling how exactly to have sex ..I hope her parents get brought up on neglect charges because a 10 year old does not have the capacity to make a decision of this capacity
How old is the boy in this relationship?? most boys don't start having sexual fantasy let alone acts at this age to that extent

Answer 3

Well, I told both my daughters at age 7 or 8, when they first asked. Still it seems a little harsh to blame the parents on the basis they did not tell the kid what sex and reproduction were prior to the act. Perhaps it would have made a difference, or perhaps not. There are, after all, a ton of teenage pregnancies amongst those who already KNOW how it works but engage in unsafe sex anyway, certain the lightning of pregnancy will not strike them. Kids can enter puberty 'normally' as young as 9 and in some rare cases as young as 8, though of course it usually happens years latter. As for many people here claiming she should have been supervised to prevent sex I think that perception is rather naïve. Many parents don’t even realise their own kid’s smoke at age 10, and you can have sex leading to pregnancy faster than you can smoke a cigarette. At the age of 10 the kids would be experimenting with the act, they would not show any signs of relationship bonding leading to sex. Such an encounter could happen very quickly and unknowingly, with the repercussions showing up months later.

Answer 4

Ummm--that's a real poser of a question. Let me see if I can bumble around and try to give you as honest and thoughtful an answer as I can.

I guess for some reason many adults seem to think that if they give children the factual information, the kids will just run right out and put it to the test. I don't see that as a real danger, however. If anything, stories about the stork or finding babies under cabbage leaves or rosebushes are more likely to leave youngsters even more confused.

I grew up under the influence of someone who really and truly seemed to believe that if children know where babies come from and how they get there, they'll just get ideas about doing the very thing you don't want them to do--this individual really thought we did them a favor by keeping them in ignorance. Fortunately, I didn't buy into it, and when the time came that my own kids wanted to know I told them as truthfully as I could, because my opinions were just the opposite: if they were old enough to frame the questions, they deserved factual answers.

I don't think we do our children any service by keeping them ignorant of sexual matters, especially given the society we live in today. Youngsters today are bombarded from every direction with ads, movies, and TV shows that focus on sex. We need to arm them with facts, not fantasies.

Answer 5

I feel bad for Far-Potasium- wishing he'd been aborted...

Anyway, back to the question... There may be factors we aren't aware of. What are the circumstances around her becoming pregnant? was her behavior (entering the sex act) voluntary? or was she raped? Did she get pregnant by a boy at school? family member (Please, say it's not!)?...

I'm not a mother, yet, but I do have plans on how to handle "the talk"-- Mostly that it's not going to be just one conversation!

I think that some parents don't tell their kids the truth because of their own discomfort surrounding the topic. Possibly, they don't know how to start the conversation. Maybe they are afraid that telling their kids stuff b/c they think more info will make the kids more curious, causing bigger problems... (which is kinda funnyconsidering that when I found out the mechanics of sex, I thought, "Eeeew! A guy is going to put his what where??!? THAT IS GROSS!!!"... followed by a whole-body shudder.)

Answer 6

You know that is because parents are always saying that there kids are to young to know but in my opinion they are not. My 1st born came to me at 6 years old and thought she new what sex was. She had heard older kids talk about it in school. Needless to say she was not right at all, but I told her right then and there exactly what it was. I think that she needed to know the truth. Her father was a little P.O. because he thought she was to young but I am hoping that my openness with my daughter will help her feel comfortable with coming to me for other issues! So far has worked out great. I would rather talk to her about sex issues then having her make a mistake and get pregnant early like the 10year old...I want so much more for her then that and she does too..She is now 9 and has already told me she wants to go to college and become a nurse! More power to her!!

Answer 7

That girl is not pregnant because her parents didn't have the sex talk with her. She's pregnant because her neglectful parents didn't supervise her. Why is a 10 year old having sex at all?! Are you saying her parents should have told her about sex so she'd know about condoms and birth control? They should have been watching her, a 10 year old shouldn't have the opportunity to have sex. God, what's wrong with people.

Answer 8

I dint agree her parents should be watching there child at 10 why would she be alone long enough to get pregnant first of all and if she was pregnant obviously she already new about it. Why would her parents telling prevent it? Most kids are hearing about sex in first grade sorry to say would rather not tell my 6 year old how to do it so she can go try it.

Answer 9

Some parents don't know what to say. They under estimate the maturity of the child and don't think they need to know something like that. The truth is that some adults get embarrased by the topic and maybe their parents never talked to them about it so they don't know they need to talk about it to their child. And in this case the parent might have thought they had some more time before they need to have the talk.

Answer 10

some parents do,but some times kids do not listen.my daughter is 11 and she knows all about it. i would like to know how a 10 year old got out of the house to be able to have sex at her age.