How do you deal with unrequited love?

Answer 1

That's a hard thing to go through - we can't control who we love, and can't make other people love us, so sometimes it happens that you love someone who just doesn't share your feelings.

Nothing I say can "make it better" or "fix it," but I do have some thoughts you might consider:

1) Whatever it is you love about a person tells you what you're looking for, so you can take this experience and tell yourself, "Now I know that I'm looking for someone with his kindness, or her sense of humor..." One of the things about love is that it teaches you a lot about yourself, and what you want.

2) Don't take it personally. I know, I know - you probably feel rejected, so how can you not take it personally, but... the reasons the other person doesn't share your feelings may not have much to do with you. Maybe this person isn't in a place where he or she can be available for a relationship - already in love, or distracted by work, or... there are as many reasons for not being in love as for being in love, and most of them have little to do with you.

3) Keep busy! The more time you have on your hands, the more time you have to go over, and over what did, or didn't happen. This is a good time to experiment, try new things, meet new people, volunteer, keep yourself occupied. Along the way, you'll make new friends, learn new things, and keep yourself from driving yourself nuts. Put it this way - it takes time to get over something like this. At the end of that time, if you, say, learn to knit and join a knitting class, you'll be over it, know several new people, and have a nice sweater. Let yourself dwell on it, and it'll take longer to get over - plus you won't have the sweater.

4) Accept that this is part of the human experience and happens to everyone. People who say they've never been in this situation are either kidding themselves, or haven't gotten out enough. If it helps, tell yourself "He (or she) doesn't know what he's missing." After all, it's not that person you really want, right? It's someone kind of like that, except he loves and appreciates you.

5) Go ahead and be a little bit petty, if just where you can hear it. Nobody's perfect. Remind yourself of how he started every other sentence with, "Well..." or how she couldn't pass up a shoe sale, no matter what else was going on.

6) Give yourself some credit. The pain you're feeling now tells you that you are capable of feeling love, of allowing yourself to feel love. Not everybody can. Remind yourself of every kind thing you've ever done, skill you've learned, every little thing you've ever accomplished, and know that you not only have it within you to get through this, you have something special to offer, including a loving heart, and will find the person who appreciates and needs what you have. It's perfectly okay to think of that person and think, "You missed out!"

Just don't hide away, curled up around your pain. Good luck!

Answer 2

Dealing With Unrequited Love

Answer 3

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Answer 4

That is some serious deep emotional sh!t you got yourself into. unrequited love sucks and there's nothing much you can do besides accept you have those feelings. She sees you as a friend and a lazy rebound bf when her relationships don't work. you're her back up plan, sorry to say. She might decide to date you when she figures out that nobody else treats her the same way, then again are you ok with that? being the last resort? Try your hardest to find someone else, and DON'T wait for her. You might end up screwing yourself if you dont date now before you get way too old.

Answer 5

It depends on if it's yours or someone else's.

If it's yours, you can continue yearning for the unattainable person, and make yourself miserable until you get tired of it; or you can force your attention away from the loved one by staying busy and surrounding yourself with friends and activities, and new experiences.

If it is someone else's unrequited love of you, the most compassionate thing you can do is to separate yourself from the one who loves you, totally. Being "friends" gives them false hope, and endless misery. Perhaps someday you can be friends, but they'll have to get over you first.

Over the years I've had a lot of experience in this area, on both the giving and receiving end, and I know what works. It's never easy.

Answer 6

that is such a good question. I am going through that right now.
The man I am seeing says he will never settle down in a relationship. We dated each other 7 years ago. And we bumped in to each other in the grocery store. Now we spend every evening together. Our chemistry is once in a lifetime chemistry.
Well, in our case twice in a life time. I know I love him very much.
I don't want to scare him away by telling him that.
I deal with it by not telling him how I feel. I know I need to tell him sometime, but not sure when. I fear I will lose him if I tell him.
I deal with it by telling myself that I am not worthy of his love....which is a lie because I am worthy of his love. I realize I can't try to convince him when it comes to love.....he has a long string of women who have thought THEY were the woman who could love him deeply enough to change him. They were warned by him that he doesn't settle down. And they, as he says, were foolish enough to think they could be the one who changed his heart and mind. I will NOT be like them. I don't want to be just another women in his past who thought they could change him.
Thus, I need to just accept the fact that there will never be more than what we have now. Kisses & Hugs & warnings of not falling for him. Deep inside of me I hope I am the one he will love enough to want to have a relationship with.

I do hope you get answers from other people who will help my situation.

For now.....I just love and don't tell the man. Not sure how long I can be like this.

Answer 7

There are two ways,
Get on with your life and realize that this person is never going to return your feelings.
Or declare your love and let the chips fall where they may!

Answer 8

Secrets To Getting Ex Back - http://ExBack.GoNaturallyCured.com

Answer 9

Free yourself by renunciation- renounce
renounce
renounce
renounce
If you truly love someone, you care more about their happiness than your own, and if they do not love you, you have to love them enough to be able to say goodbye and let them be free.

Answer 10

There isn't anything to do but get over it :) Good luck.