Should a child abused by her mother be forced to see the child even supervised?

Question

I have a step daughter who was beaten severly twice by her mother and step father. My husband (her biological father) and I were awarded temporary custody however, the child is still required per the protective order to see her mother. My step daughter is TRAMATIZED every time she is forced to go. She begs and pleas not to have to go yet my husband and I would be pentalized for not obeying the protective order. Does anyone else think this is absurd? A child should not be forced to be around their abuser...no matter who did the abuse. Am I wrong?

Answer 1

In my professional opinion as a Clinical Psychiatrist, France, I think that the judge in this case is in serious need of mental help. (He/She is as bad has the mother who abused her own daughter).

Don't know what country that you reside in, but I would go back to the court system and request a different judge and explain what you have written here.

Plus it would be a good idea if you could obtain a letter from a psychologist or psychiatrist stating that the child is "traumatized", every time she has to see her biological mother.

I have an in-depth understanding of the court systems an many times I am in shock when a judge, especially a female will let a rapist out of a mental hospital when I argue before the judge that the patients shows no remorse and does not respond to treatment.

Thirty minutes after their release by the court system they are picked up by the police for rape again. If I went before the judge and told them what a jackass they are like I would like, I would be held in contempt of court.

Sad, they have no real knowledge of psychiatric problems and they hold the power like they are some kind of God.

Answer 2

I think it is extremely absurd and ridiculous, but it happens all the time. The court could care less about inflicting emotional trauma. The only thing it cares about is not looking like it is putting the child in danger.

When you look at the fact that O.J. Simpson got custody of his children, you can understand the risks the courts are willing to take with children.

My son has to do unsupervised visitation even though one of the children was charged with drug possession and even though the parents left the children unattended (15, 8,7) and went on vacation. The court ordered that my son not be left unattended and that he not be left with the druggie for more than four hours and that she have one positive drug test. The court did not take into account that these people have bad judgment and that they could cause harm in another way.

So you are not wrong. It is just that you are involved with a man who has a child in the court system and that can be a hard thing to watch. In my state, I am at risk of losing custody should I not make the child available for visitation, so I understand that part as well.

I don't know whether these visits are supervised, but you could ask the court that they be temporarily supervised as the child feels so traumatized by the visits that something must be going on there.

Answer 3

It happens all to often. The best thing to do for the child is to comfort her and reassure her that she will not be alone with her mother and that you or her father will be there waiting for her. As a person that was raised in violence I know that with the proper support and assurance that she is well loved she will survive. Please try to help her understand that she has done nothing wrong and don't talk about this subject with her unless she brings up the subject. Talk to her in a calm voice and let her know that she will be seeing her mother ahead of time. Let her be a kid. It is very easy in our anger to talk on the phone with friends and family, she should not over hear this. It is sad that still today our pets have more rites than the protection of our children

Answer 4

In my section that's portion of the courtroom ordered provider plan. that's usually round 50 or 100 funds a month, counting on their understand-how. I have considered it as low as 25 a month. at the same time as the ascertain receives SSI for a psychological/actual incapacity then i do no longer imagine the choose in my burg can order it. the quantity is so small that's merely about unnecessary even with the indisputable fact that it does strengthen to the ascertain that their youthful toddlers are nonetheless their responsibility and they desire to artwork on getting them back. at the same time as the ascertain does no longer pay it, then the provider plan isn't being achieved. If parental rights are terminated the judges around the following in many circumstances nonetheless order new child help till the youngster is followed or a lengthy time period out....i'm no longer confident if I consider that section. I do trust mothers and fathers who're nonetheless operating in direction of reunification desire to be to blame to their toddlers and to the options they make.

Answer 5

You need to appeal to the courts in order to get this changed. Perhaps a mental health professional recommending it will help. Which would mean a visit to one but it sounds like she can use it anyway. She has been through enough and should not be forced to visit someone who has beaten her. That would be like asking a victim to visit their aggressor When you put it that way it sounds absurd. I'm so sorry for your troubles and wish you all the best. Be diligent and stay strong.

Answer 6

Is your step daughter in therapy? If so, perhaps you can enlist the aid of the therapist to go to court with you to stop the visitations. Get a lawyer's advice on this first. If your step daughter is not in therapy, she should be. It probably would be a good thing for your husband, yourself and your step daughter to be counseled together. Do anything possible to help this child defeat her traumatic feelings. Therapy, therapy, therapy and a good lawyer go a long way to help protect a child.

Answer 7

It is totally absurd and one more instance in a system that doesn't always work. If you have a mediator, make an appointment with him or her. Otherwise, go to someone in Family Court at the courthouse and ask who will hear your problem.

Answer 8

It is absurd, but the law is the law. Tell her that she doesn't have to touch, talk to or even look at her mother. She can just sit there, take a book and read until the visit is over.

Answer 9

No. Espeically if she dosen't want to see her mom. I went through this when I was 1year to 5years old. I was in foster care and when my real mom decided to visit every now and then, I fought and cried and pleaded not to have to see her.
That is normal for a child who's been with an abusive parent and are now in a normal secure environment.

Answer 10

No. Go to the court and tell them the childs eishes, or have the little girl tell them. Lord, that's awful. I'd have to seriously damage anyone who put a finger on my kids. And I most certainly wouldn't want anyone who abused them to see them. Does she just want to continue causing the child pain? Why does she want visitation if she beat the poor kid?