Am i messing up as a parent?

Question

My 29 year old boyfriend insistes on spanking my 15 year old daughter as a last resort...is this inappropriate?

Answer 1

First of all, if YOU didn't find it inappropriate, you wouldn't have asked in the first place. You know that it is. And what IN GOD'S NAME gives this man the right to even lay a hand on your daughter? ARE YOU JOKING??????WAKE UP!!!! I am not trying to be mean, but I feel as if you are living in this little box where you aren't making a rational decision. Your daughter is FIFTEEN years old...she is almost GROWN for God's sake!!! How do you think this makes HER feel when he does it? You wanted an opinion, so here it is. Your child, your daughter is THE most important person in your life. SHE will be the one that is there through thick and thin. The one that YOU will have to rely on when you are old and can't get up and down to pee. SHE is the one that you brought into this world, and silently made a deal with God that you would take care of this little angel, no matter what. You are not doing your job as a MOTHER. Your boyfriend needs boundaries. Better yet, your boyfriend needs to step to the curb. Period. There is no guessing about that, because ten to one that sick M***** F***** is getting his jollies off on spanking her. Don't you know that some men have a fetish for that? And if he is doing this to her, what the hell else is he doing?? Have you thought about that? A last resort or not, he shouldn't be laying a hand on her, and I bet if you asked her, she would have the same feeling about it. You need to go with your instinct her honey, otherwise, something really bad is going to happen, and you are going to regret it. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 2

I think it is inappropriate bc shes 15 and shouldn't have to pull down her pants to get a spanking not at that age... theres other things you can do to punish a child of yours. I came from a family that was kinda violent and I don't agree that that would be a great solution to you answer. I think not hitting a child at that age would be better for you bc shes going threw the teen age stage and will push you away if you do so. Talking to her being there for her more would help.

Answer 3

I think it's totally inappropriate!! First, your daughter is 15! HELLO??? She shouldn't be getting spankings. Second, your bf should NOT be the one doling them out! Where is her father, why are you not disciplining her?? Step up! Be her mother! Kick that guy out!
You are not messing up as a parent, I'm sure you're doing the best you know how, but you need to step up. Don't be so hard on yourself, remember that YOU are her parent, and take control!

Answer 4

if your boyfriend is spanking your 15 yr old daughter, i think i would question that .....he sounds creepy....first of all a 15 yr old is too old to spank, by her biological parents let alone a 29 yr old boyfriend. i think he is just trying to get his rocks off. I would put a stop to it and step up and discipline your own child. he should be 'hands off' when it comes to disciplining your child.

Answer 5

Absolutely - one would wonder why he would want to spank a 15 year old girl. Sounds like a FREAK

Answer 6

well at 15... its mostly a control issue. i would start by taking her fav stuff away (phone internet etc) like grounding. spanking at that age would be last resort cause it probably wont work. or... if you two arent close. you could make her spend mroe time with you as punishment. talk and be open to what she has to say cause at this age she can become rebelius.

Answer 7

As long as it was strictly done in the form of discipline I don't see a problem. There are a billion and one theories on how to be a parent but all you can do is what you think is right and needed. We all are individuals with individual lives so you can't judge yourself based upon what other people think.

Answer 8

lady wake up, for starters they could brother and sister look at the ages.alot of 29 year old act 15 themself. maybe his "last resort" is a thrill. these days who know. how long have you been in this relationship? re-organize

Answer 9

I think this is seriously inappropriate!!! There are other ways to disipline a child and the fact that your daughter is on the verge of adulthood is not to be taken lightly. Just seems a little fishy to me!!!

Answer 10

I dont think you have any business havong a boyfriend when you have a teen at home. She needs you during these difficult times as a teen. Dump him and focus on ayour daughter. You are not setting a good example for her and she is rebelling. If you need someone to satisfy you, buy a vibrator.